Under what circumstance is it acceptable to use the opposite gender's toilet facilities?

Haha! I like this question. It reminds me of some of my stupid toilet memories.

When I was young I never took much attention to the signs of the toilet in my school. I went to the rooms indiscriminately. The rooms for boys and girls were identical, which added to the confusion. Not until one day a boy said behind me: “Why is there a girl in this boy’s room?” did I begin to change.

And more recently, I realized I had been going to the wrong room since I first entered university. There was actually no sign to distinguish the two rooms, and the men’s toilets were the only things to tell the two rooms apart. But I always thought that the room could be used by both men and women!

I can only think of one acceptable circumstance for using the wrong toilet: when one toilet breaks down. Shortly after I made my university toilet discovery, the ladies room broke down. A big paper was hung on the door, which read: “Toilet currently unusable, please use the men room instead!”

Any pot in a storm.

If there are too many women in the women’s queue and there is no one waiting for the gents, those stalls are fair game. But I live in Europe and we aren’t so hung up on gendered toilets.

If there are too many men in the men’s line and there is no one waiting for the ladies, those stalls are fair game. But I live in America and we aren’t so hung up on gendered toilets.

It is much more acceptable for a woman to use the “men’s room” than the reversed situation.
I figure it would be social suicide for a man to attempt it.
~I can see the newspaper article already… charged with disturbing the peace, peeping tom, harassment, public exposure – and in that sate public exposure is a sex offense requiring registration as a sex offender. He loses his job, and house and ends up sleeping under a bridge because he had that second cup of tea so his girlfriend did not have to drink hers alone.

but @LuckyGuy, @Dan_Lyons knows what he’s talking about, surely and he’s not just posted that because he thinks he’s being clever and mocking me.

@LuckyGuy I don’t think it’s tea that would do it. Usually something a little stronger.
Has anyone actually seen a longer line at the men’s room? I never have.

I use the men’s room all the time in restaurants. If there is just one for girls and one for boys and the girls room has a line, any line, it could be one person, and the men’s room is open, I use it. It’s stupid that they are labeled any gender at all in that situation. Go into a Starbucks or a small restaurant and sometimes there is one bathroom period. I know even the Starbuck’s I sometimes go to in NYC has two bathrooms and they still are both unisex.

@LuckyGuy You might be right. I have seen men come in with a very young daughter or when the bathroom is multistall. Or, back in the day when some men’s rooms didn’t have changing tables for babies. I don’t think women care. My husband came in with me when I was so injured from my accident I could not go safely by myself. Those are special circumstances though. Most of the time there isn’t a line for the men’s room.

It’s not as taboo as it once was especially when both rooms only have one porcelin hole and you can lock the door. If the coast is clear it’s fair game. An old bar i used to frequent simply gave up on keeping them separate. I’m also seeing more and more unisex bathrooms in high traffic places like gas stations and even coffee shops.

If it’s a place you’re familiar with that only has one toilet and a lock on the door, go for it if the door is unlocked.

The only other time I would do it is if I was in a line for the men’s room and a female friend did her business, assured me the ladies room was empty, and offered to watch the door. I’d never walk into the women’s room unguided. Just because you’re not in a stall doesn’t mean there isn’t something exposed that you do not want a strange member of the opposite sex to see.

I’d never go in there unless I was either escorted, escorting, or unconscious.
The sight of an 80 year old man gently helping his arthritically crippled wife of 52 years perform her intimate duties brings tears to the eyes of every beholder. While the view of a 60 year old single man just appears ka-ree-pee.
“Hello, 911?”

@LuckyGuy You are talking about multistall bathrooms. Primarily I was talking about single bathrooms. Multistall men’s rooms almost never have lines, or at minimum never have a shorter line than the woman’s room.

If I am in a restaurant (or fast food place) and need the bathroom, and someone is in ladies’ room taking their time, and men’s room is empty, I will go in after checking first to make sure it’s empty. I will only do that if I know I am going to be quick. 9 times out of 10, when using a public restroom, I am quick anyway.

I will use a men’s room if it’s a one holer and the ladies room is occupied. I never understood why they don’t just make one holer bathrooms unisex.

I was meandering about a building late at night a few nights ago with my friend and nobody else was there. I used the women’s room because I was curious to see what it looked like. I found Narnia!

@dxs You wrote: “I found Narnia!” Just as I thought! I’ve suspected that for years.

Is it true the toilets heart shaped? I know drain pipes are. That’s so the heart shaped pellets can be efficiently whisked away to the perfume factory. Why else would women eat magic bioprobiotic with live culture yogurt? The commercials all show flowers in their digestive tract so I can only assume the pellets are like rose petals.
Did you wear dark sunglasses? I have not dared to peek inside for fear of the UV-G light getting on my skin and potentially changing my gender preference.

@Adirondackwannabe

I absolutely have. At most of the concerts I attend, we XXs are outnumbered by the XYs about fifty to one.

There’s never a line in the ladies’ room at the Cannibal Corpse show.

A few years ago, my sister and I used the men’s room at a concert. The line for the women’s room was around the block. A good hour wait. It was only 10 minutes for the men’s room. The men were very courteous about it. There was a line of women waiting to use the stalls. The men continued to use the urinal trough. We turned our backs on the men’s activity to afford them a bit of privacy.

When you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go!

@LuckyGuy @dxs You two probably don’t know the half of it. Some women’s bathrooms have lounges, complete with makeup mirrors and couches and chairs. We must have full-length mirrors in there. Magazines, too. Some ladies rooms are regular hangouts.
By comparison, though, I have always been impressed at ESPN Zone restaurants. There are TVs built into the walls above the urinals in the men’s room so that you don’t miss a single moment of your game. For the stalls, the TVs are positioned for a seated view, but who would really get that comfortable in there? I guess if you couldn’t get a seat at the bar…

My question from 2010:

http://www.fluther.com/89588/why-do-we-consider-it-acceptable-for-a-woman-to-use/

I’ll use the gents’ facility if it’s a single, locking room (not a communal room with stalls and urinals), if the ladies room has been occupied for a while, and if I’m really having trouble waiting.

I wouldn’t go barging into a communal men’s room, just as I expect guys to stay out of the general women’s room.

I definitely knock first. No barging in.

If they have two single toilet bathrooms, like they do at a lot of gas stations. Why even make them gender specific? They’re both only holding one person anyways.

I’ve only used the women’s room i public places where the men’s room turned my stomach.

There was a gas station in San Ardo CA that had a men’s room that looked like it was from the movie Trainspotting, and a woman’s room that was pristine. I didn’t want to even walk into that men’s room for fear my shoes would be ruined.

When I visited a small town in Spain I was amused that the locals don’t really care what sign is on the door and everyone uses whichever one has the shortest queue or is cleaner. Only the tourists were bothered. I wish everywhere was more like that.

During the early stages of my transition, public bathrooms were hard; no matter which one I picked, someone would stare or tell me I was in the wrong one. I couldn’t even answer back and say “No I’m not” because my voice still sounded very feminine. Now, after nearly three years on testosterone, with facial hair and a receding hairline, no-one bothers me in the gents any more.

Honestly though, I wonder why any woman would ever want to use the mens bathroom; they are almost universally disgusting.

Odd random fact; there’s a “men only” gay bar in Manchester that still has segregated bathrooms. Why, I have no idea. Men use both of them. And yet, still, the womens one is cleaner.

@AshLeigh “Why even make them gender specific?”

‘Cuz all men are boys at heart and often leave messes in their wake?

@SadieMartinPaul, I’m not convinced. I’ve got two brothers, and two sister. The girls are worse.

The worst bathroom I ever used was on a train from Paris to Nice. It was a bumpy train. Blech!

I recently mistook the signs on the ladies toilet for the men’s at Iquitos airport in Peru. A cleaner came in and tried to tell me, but my Spanish wasn’t good enough to understand what she was saying. It was only later I worked it out- I was suitably embarrassed.

@Harold If it makes you feel any better, I went into a bathroom once and wondered to myself why the ladies rooms had urinals. It wasn’t until I sat down that it dawned on me that I was in the men’s. I’ve never felt so blonde.

@GloPro: That happened to me, too. It was in a movie theater, large bathroom. If there were men in there, it would have tipped me off.

@GloPro, did that twice in the same restaurant! I don’t know what it was about Red Robin that made me do that! The second time I realized I was in the wrong place when I heard a man peeing at the urinal.

I accidentally walked into the men’s room the first time I visited the Colts’ new stadium. I passed the entrance for the men’s and thought I was walking into the women’s. Since bathrooms are usually side by side. Turns out the bathrooms had two entrances/exits. When I saw all the men, I immediately turned around and walked out. So embarrassing.

@Judi I think it might be because some chain restaurants are all layed out the same way. One in my town has flipped the bathroom sides from every other typical orientation I’ve seen, and I was just going in that door out of habit.
I’m so glad to hear that I’m not alone in being so silly!

We have a bathroom at a local mall here and they redesigned it recently into a smaller area, and designed a strange entrance to it and it isn’t obvious right away which way to walk. My very smart and clever boyfriend had to come find me again and ask… ‘Um… is it left or right?’ I forgot to warn him. He is very shy and would have turned multiple shades of red had he err’d. Many, many people, especially the elderly get flummoxed by it and on my way out or in, I have had to be a guide and point. It makes me feel like a flight attendant. The problem is that the icons denoting the way to turn are so large that you can’t see them. They just look like avant garde designs on the wall.

@GloPro – LOL, I know how you feel!