Fluther confessions: What do you have to say my child?

I have still another, just realised I asked three questions in one night, oh the shame, the horror.

He who smelt it dealt it.

He who said the rhyme did the crime
He who did the verse made the atmosphere worse

You got a nipple in yo eye.

@ucme What do you have to say my child?… Dad?

I once dreamt we had a Flutherfest at my place. It was like we’d known each other since childhood.

@ucme How’s your Mom doing? Doing better?
Oh and let’s not talk about the thing. Even after all these years it’s too embarrassing.

@LuckyGuy How could you even allude to The-Thing-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named? It was never to be breathed again.

Father, I confess that I have been addicted to Fluther :( may God have mercy on my soul.

Your daddy is a pervert, but never fear, he is still your daddy dear. lol

@ucme Did you have naughty dreams again? Please stop eating cold pizza before you go to bed

I often fluther when I’m in pain, bored, stressed or insomniac. Which makes me feel like I’m the resident grouch.

Thankful you guys put up with me.

Father, I also want to confess that I have just sold my soul to the devil and become a mafioso. May God have mercy on my soul.

@Symbeline Haha, yeah I did, but it’s since been removed, from the topics at least.
@talljasperman Which whore from hell did I bang to have you for a youngling? :P
@LuckyGuy Mummy is recovering well, since she was flashed by a yank with a very tiny penis.
@Cruiser Not dreams no, I tend to be wide awake when masturbating :D

@ucme I’m glad to hear that she’s ok. Now that MTD, (man-tail-docking), is in vogue her description fits all my friends. After the hairless chest craze we knew that was not far behind.
By the way, your Mummy was talkin’ to my Mom and she admitted she a little worried about you. She wants to know: “When you are going to get a real job?” For this she sent you to school?

@LuckyGuy I suspect that to be a lie of sorts, although I did hear you had your mum insert her finger up your arse, nowt to do with prostate trouble, you just like it so much…she said.
Also, your mum is desperately disappointed in how you turned out, but puts on a brave face to cover up her shame, along with that mask she uses to obscure her many warts.

My confession: some of you have intrigued me enough to google you.

My confession, I’m enjoying not working for the summer. FREE AT LAST!

I’m actually @Hypocrisy_Central.

boy it’s good to get that off my chest

@ucme Hey so it has…the hell’s up widdat?

@Blondesjon It’s nice to know, Dr. Jekyll.

@Symbeline Topic editor most likely felt it crude, fair enough :D

@Blondesjon Can’t be, you’re never constantly banging on about yourself, usually playing the victim & I don’t hear violins playing each time I read your posts, more like a tuba.

that’s kinda why it’s worked for so long

NOOOOOO! @GloPro! You discovered my Mafia noir secret too?

Oh, @Mimishu1995 I know all about you. I can see why you left your past life behind and joined the mafia. If you didn’t have such a fearsome looking weapon there I would consider blackmail.

Yeah. Being a Mafioso is a great way to take revenge on anyone who have made my life miserable ~

Explaining why “mafia”+“noir” is also a perfect combination :D