(NSFW) Have you ever been abused?

I watched my dad and mom in physical altercations a couple of times as a child.

I saw my dad hit my sister twice in situations I would consider abusive. Other times were good old corporal punishment.

I think I’ve been in some emotionally crippling relationships, but we were co-dependent versus abusive, I think. It can be a fine line.

And I mentioned to you guys once that I was sexually assaulted by a handicapped man when I was 16. Fuck that guy.

In what scope of “abuse” are you speaking of less I be presumptuous?

Yes.

Yes, I have. I’ve experienced physical, sexual, mental, emotional, and financial abuse- from parents, in my marriage, at home, in the workplace and from friends. I’ve wondered why, but that’s what I’ve been dealt in life and now have to live vigilantly to protect myself

Yes. My father was verbally and physically abusive.
After my mother left him she started dating a drug dealer. She left me alone with this creepy guy a lot, so she could hang out with her crack head boyfriend. I thought he was cute at first, but now I just think he’s dangerous. I would rather not get into what happened with him, though I’m sure you can guess pretty acurately.

^ I don’t know, my imagination can run pretty wild, and if you suffered anything half of that I would have to say you are a miracle you are here and still sane.

@Hypocrisy_Central Abuse as you would define it. If you want to be clear of your personal scope then lay it out for us, by all means.

@linguaphile Wow. That sounds like a lot to take. i’m impressed it hasn’t left you closed off and cold.
When you wonder why you have endured so much, do you see a common link between the types of people you are around or any other possible thread?

Yes.

No. I’ve never been abused. I had to bust my ass as a kid, working in miserable conditions, but we all did that. We pulled together for the family and all I ever knew was love. I’m so sorry for you guys that were abused. I was a kid. What the hell would I have to defend myself?

I was psychologically abused, physically abused to a lesser extent, and emotionally neglected, which made me an easy victim for sexual abuse as a child. My unhealthy relationships were somewhat abusive, but I was no angel, either. There was a period where my son was out of control and a danger to himself and others in the household, and I went overboard trying to restrain and discipline him. It was all I knew.

When I decided I wanted to end the legacy of dysfunction and abuse, I had to unlearn those bad relationship skills, and teach myself and my son healthier ways of coping from scratch. We’re far from perfect, but we’re much healthier and happier, and very close.

I had corporal punishment at the hands of Catholic Nuns in the 60’s….my mom felt belts, hairbrushes and bars if ivory soap were the best tools at hand for meting out punishment…I had an up to then trusted male neighbor chase me down with a 12” penis candle hanging out his jeans zipper that I broke in 2 and got back handed until I safely ran away.

Unfortunately adults are so disconnected as to the damage their warped views of right and wrong are and the impact they have on young impressionable innocents. Do I blame them or the other adults they once trusted who rained holy hell upon their innocence? How do we stop this vicious cycle?

We can stop the cycle by looking in the mirror and asking ourselves if this is acceptable behavior and would we like it if it was done to us. And then stopping someone from doing it to another person.

yes

@anniereborn You made me realize my answer was too simplistic. The problem is much deeper than my answer.

@hearkat That must have been tough to face in yourself. You should be proud to have turned that situation around. Thanks for such an honest answer.

Yes… but one of my abusers is missing his two front teeth.

@Adirondackwannabe I’m not sure how you mean?

Yes, I was sexually abused as a very young child. The person who did that to me died when I was 11 years old so that’s when it stopped thankfully.

One thing… just because someone was abused doesn’t make them a highly potential abuser.

Research shows that abusers were often abused as children. People assume it also means abused children grow up to become abusers.

No…. the statistics of abused children becoming abusers is surprisingly low, actually.

^ That is a government secret not to be leaked, now hush up about it. ~~

I’ve been a victim of peeping. The last incident, it’s my neighbor who did it. I was so scared, I was screaming because I thought he would enter our house through the back door after I caught him peeping on me while I was taking a shower. Before also while jogging on a vacant lot outside our village some drunk guy just grabbed my hands.