Is your life better sober or inebriated?

Be always drunken. Nothing else matters: that is the only question. If you would not feel the horrible burden of Time weighing on your shoulders and crushing you to the earth, be drunken continually.
Drunken with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you will. But be drunken.
And if sometimes, on the stairs of a palace, or on the green side of a ditch, or in the dreary solitude of your own room, you should awaken and the drunkenness be half or wholly slipped away from you, ask of the wind, or of the wave, or of the star, or of the bird, or of the clock, of whatever flies, or sighs, or rocks, or sings, or speaks, ask what hour it is; and the wind, wave, star, bird, clock, will answer you: “It is the hour to be drunken! Be drunken, if you would not be martyred slaves of Time; be drunken continually! With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you will.
-Charles Baudelaire

I find it very hard to cope without alcohol. Physically I’m fine as a field of stags in heat. But mentally, I feel bored, nothing is interesting and I have a severe lack of motivation for anything. I know this sounds minor, but to me it is not, especially when I remember how awesome stuff was before the drinking. Which is lame really; why would I start drinking again if I recognize that life was better without it? Well I guess that’s why it’s a vice or some shit. I couldn’t really even answer as to why I started in the first place. And what I do know I’d rather keep to myself.
But I can’t go back to it, or else everything will just tumble down a pit again and get worse and worse.
But the urge is THERE, and very hard to combat. I’m not entirely clean, as I give up a lot and just have a night of drinking. But at least now, for the passed year it hasn’t been every single night. And I’m serious here, for about three years, it was EVERY NIGHT, and on the odd occasion that I wasn’t able to have my shit, I almost felt on the edge of despair.

Just makes me feel stupid, because I recognize that life was better without drink, so why do I still want it so much? Interests and the love of life come back, but it is so slow and gradual, and beer is still a very strong incentive for me.

My life is so much better since I got sober. But @Hypocrisy_Central you ask a naive question, because most people are unable to parse that distinction.

When I drank, it was my best thinking that got me to continue drinking. Alcohol was the treatment for all that was wrong in my life, and it worked to a great extent, until it didn’t. And even then, it worked just enough one or two times a month for an hour or two to convince me it was still working in my life.

But I was unable to see that or understand it or to take an honest hard look at my life and what alcohol was doing to it.

So people without a problem with alcohol will do just as you describe, and will not take a drink unless they are in a position to safely enjoy it. The rest of us cannot make that decision.

I find, and I don’t know if other people feel this way, that alcohol makes me feel whatever I already feel more intensely.

So if I’m depressed, I tend to stay away from alcohol, because it just makes me feel worse.

But if I’m trying to have a good time, am in generally good spirits, and have a positive outlook, it can be a nice social lubricant, and help me ease out of my shell a little.

I also don’t generally like to be “inebriated”. I enjoy a drink – mostly because it tastes good. If I’m spending money on alcohol I’m buying something that is of higher quality. It is a treat that happens to also be a tool on occasion.

As Socrates said: ”...Let [man] know how to choose the mean and avoid the extremes on either side, as far as possible… this is the way to happiness.”

Sober. I don’t.

Both. haha
I prefer clear thinking and sobriety most of the time, and I never get “inebriated”. I know my limits, and rarely exceed them, however, I do enjoy a few lite beers, 3–4, several times a week in the summer. I also do not undergo any negative personality changes and have never had such issues with consuming moderate amounts of alcohol.

I also only imbibe in the early evenings before dinner time. I do not like drinking alcohol with meals, I’m a water girl, and have zero desire to ever drink at the lunch hour. I do not get how some people can have cocktails at lunch, I;d be asleep at 3 o’ clock. lol

Sometimes a pirate coffee is just what the doctor ordered, though. Haha.

I haven’t had a drink of alcohol in years. If however, you had asked about the ganja…

@zenvelo But @Hypocrisy_Central you ask a naive question, because most people are unable to parse that distinction.
What do you believer causes people not to be able to distinguish being schockered, wasted or blitzed from falling in a deep ravine or pit if they can see the detriment of falling in a pit, why not the negatives of not being in control? Or are they afraid to be in control so they have to go out of their way to take the control from themselves?

@Seek I also don’t generally like to be “inebriated”. I enjoy a drink – mostly because it tastes good.
I am not so interested in the social drinking, I know people who can have a beer or two while watching the game with their dogs or buffalo wings and not lose control and get stupid, and there are people I know who have to have 3 40oz just to get stupid. The reason they can’t deal with life sober in their own minds, I don’t know. Eventually when it gets to a point they can’t keep a job, or hold down meaningful relationships, I wonder if they found their choice worth it or not. What would make them see life sloshed or wasted better than not, even with the unmasked problems it brings.

@Dan_Lyons If however, you had asked about the ganja…
Let’s ask about it, can you do without it, and if so why not? Would that be an indictment that your sober life is lacking something that the Mary Jane has to fill?

Sober – By far. The light is better, people are friendlier, my reactions are faster,
I will drink a little to be sociable but you’ll never find me drunk.
If you do, please call the police! I’ve been drugged!

Yes hypocrisy, I can do without and am doing so. Lately I have found that all it does is make me sleepy, and I need no help in that direction whatsoever.

How about you. Are you a drunkard? Are you a drug addict? Can you do without your addiction(s)?

Like @Symbeline, this subject is sensitive and largely one I don’t know the answers to.
There are many situations in my life that the negative outcome was a direct result of drinking alcohol. There are many memories I have that I don’t share that are shameful and a direct relation to alcohol. I know my path in life has changed because of alcohol. My short answer is my life is better sober. I just haven’t chosen to always live it that way.

Alcohol, for the writer, is a tool. I stay sober for my most wonderful of relationships. I know when a writing mood strikes me, and the red wine comes out and the writing mood strikes. Lately, I fuck sober and write drunk. I have the best of both worlds, but, unfortunately, my fuck partner won’t be available until September. Expect plenty of drunk Fluthers from me between now and then.

@Dan_Lyons How about you. Are you a drunkard? Are you a drug addict? Can you do without your addiction(s)?
The only addictions, if it can be called that, is shopping online at Amazon, though I never actually buy anything 97% of the time, and Fluther; you people and the way you think are so fascinating, and baffling. I have never had any desire to be drunk, or high, or live that way. To me it makes about as much sense as taking a perfectly tuned Lamborghini, putting ill-fitting bald tires on it, loading it up with watered down fuel, knocking it out of alignment, spraying stucco on the air breather, topping it all off by smearing Vaseline over the windshield, then expecting to speed down a curvy stretch of road with the same speed and efficiency as it would before you tinkered with it to make it perform less than what the car builder engineered it. Whatever problem I had would still be there when I sobered up, _I could do no effective solving of the problem if I can’t even find the door, if anything, the problem will compound because if I can’t work, then I lose my income, and now I have more problems because I have no way to pay my expenses.

I prefer sober with occassional moderate distractions.

Your questions speaks of extremes, either all or nothing.

My life is good because I know when it’s time to be sober and when it’s time to crack the relief valve and blow off a little steam.

Even half a glass of wine turns everything into a blur. This sensation of loss of control is terrible.

@Hypocrisy_Central why not the negatives of not being in control? Or are they afraid to be in control so they have to go out of their way to take the control from themselves?

I can’t speak for those for whom alcohol is not a problem, but for drinkers like me, consider this cite from the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous:

The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago. We are without defense against the first drink.

@Hypocrisy_Central: If you are going to use Yiddish, at least get it right. Schnockered.

Sober, but then I’ve only been drunk maybe twice — way back in high school… so I really wouldn’t know.

@BhacSsylan: The Beaudelaire is gorgeous, even though the advice may be misguided, but there are some translation issues.

“Le Bateau Ivre” does translate as “The Drunken Boat.”

“Il faut toujours être ivre” is “it is always necessary to be drunk.”
“Il faut vous enivrer sans tréve” is “you must get drunk without respite.”
“Il est l’heure de s“enivrer” is “It is time to get drunk.”

(“Je suis un imbécile ivre” is “I am a drunken idiot. I said that, not Beaudelaire. However, I have never been drunk and no longer even drink the monthly glass of wine.

@gailcalled “Il faut vous enivrer sans tréve is “you must get drunk without respite.”
Trêve. :)

^^I thought I was typing the circumflex key on the laptop but my eyes let me down.

Here it is. Trêve. I scold other people for not being accurate and that was just laziness on my part.

Well, I knew it had to be trêve, but I still looked up ’‘tréve’’ in case it was actually a word. haha My dad was a huuuge fan of Beaudelaire, but I never caught on much, myself.

(Check out his voluptuous (one of his favorite words) poem to his mistress’s hair, La Chevelure And read a short bio to find out how his alcohol and drug excesses played out…a nasty end.)

Heh, not surprising, the translation is from Eugene O’Neill’s ‘Long Day’s Journey Into Night’, so he probably took some liberty for the sake of the prose. Thanks for the clarification, though!

I used to think it was better inebriated now I know it is better sober.

@zenvelo The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so called will power becomes practically nonexistent. We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.
NO ATTACK ON YOU, but to me that passage is just a cop out. I could use an example but I don’t want to make it worse to anyone offended.

@gailcalled If you are going to use Yiddish, at least get it right. Schnockered.
However would I keep you busy if to not follow behind to clean things up? ~~

@flutherother I used to think it was better inebriated now I know it is better sober. I used to think it was better inebriated now I know it is better sober.
What was the tipping point or ”ah ha moment”, that let you know being high, blitzed, and wasted was not better?

I don’t know if better is the right description. Less boring might be more what you are looking for.

@Hypocrisy_Central When children came along.

You know what’s perfect? An energetic, productive, sober day, followed by a relaxing meal and a glass or two of wine that matches the food.

@Hypocrisy_Central Your calling that a cop out demonstrates you have no understanding of alcoholism or addiction.