In your opinion what keeps people here at Fluther, and what moves or drives them to some other web site?

What keeps people: the knowledge atmosphere, the social atmosphere.
What makes people move on: boredom, getting modded and feeling butt hurt about it.

@dxs well said ,thanks.

I’ve seen a lot leave because they got tired of getting flamed because they didn’t agree with the majority. .

The consumer of internet sites tends to be fickle, and many jump from site to site. For most, the novelty of a site runs out within a year. I haven’t quite figured out what makes some people stick around after the novelty wears off, but I suppose there’s a personality trait that we have in common where we like some familiarity.

For Jellies, in particular, most people here have expressed liking our particular balance of having guidelines but not being so uptight as some other Q&A sites. Some reference sites where there was too little or no moderation, and others where the moderation is too strict or the user base was too pretentious. Others seem to enjoy that the user base is smaller and relatively anonymous – I’ve heard Jellies complain about other sites asking for the user’s real name, and some who have so many people that it’s too busy to manage.

Clearly there are people who like a free range web, and others who like a more selective site, or else those other places wouldn’t exist. That’s the beauty of the web, there’s something for everyone.

People stay because some people here are cool & interesting. People leave because some are vocally opposite. ;D

Fluther used to be a hell of a good time, but the quantity and quality of posts continues to dwindle. It’s become very predictable, and while that’s comforting to some, it’s just plain boring to others.
I find myself here less and less, and have to search for something that piques my interest more and more. The game questions used to hold my interest between bouts of brilliance, but they now seem to get dominated by members that don’t even understand the thread, but post over and over and over again. I hate it when I log on to see where someone said something really thought provoking 2 responses up, that was answered with “Then everyone would do it.” or “No.”
Fortunately, I’m catching up on work and reading more.

@ibstubro I’m not trying to be mean just for the sake of it, but I often see people lament the current state of Fluther and then say that it used to be better, like as if they’re some kind of exception.

I use it as a social site because FB is a little too boring. I come and go throughout the day and am saddened on slow days with little input.

For the most part people here are interesting. I do think that over the past few months the excitement generated by controversy and opposing viewpoints has lessened. I don’t like it when we all conform (feel free to disagree with me here) to what is politically correct. That being said (I just said that because that particular saying irritates people) I think civility and self restrain is necessary.

What makes them stay:
The social aspects, the discussions.
What makes them leave:
they hate having their beliefs challenged, and are unable to defend them.

I stay because it feels like home.

I consider leaving because of how nasty and cruel and rude and hateful some people can be when they don’t agree with you.

@Dutchess_III You should have seen some of the flame wars on ASkville , you would swear there was real bombs and bullets flying , fluther is a lot more polite.

Among the many things I like about Fluther is that it’s easy to switch topics without losing one’s place in another thread.

Right before I joined here I was a daily participant in a social commentary/discussion site, but it was frustrating if you were not one of the first five or six postings. And if you answered early and came back later, it was near impossible to sort through.

And 10/12 years ago, I was active on a site with lots of discussion threads and an ongoing conversation, and got to know the personalities and interests. But the site was reformatted to be more of ongoing discussion threads; if you missed a day you were completely lost.

The structure here keeps many of us around; people leave because of weariness at some ongoing disputes over certain issues that seem to creep into a lot of threads.

@zenvelo Oh like religion, and politics for starters??

@SQUEEKY2 You got it! See, someone always brings up religion and/or politics, just like you did! :-)

@zenvelo well they are 2 very hot topics that very few can agree on, and most think their view is the only view on the topic,those types I try and stay away from.

Stay : Habitual
Leave : Weaklings taking things way too seriously.

Fluther’s a community, with all that community entails: an opportunity to connect, to be heard, to get feedback, to be recognized. Everybody needs community in some form, but tastes vary. Fluther is like a quiet little blue-state college town. Chances are, if you’d like living in a place like that, you’ll like Fluther.

The “quiet little” aspect can get a bit boring at times, but it also means you’re less likely to get lost in the herd. Here people quickly get to know you (for better or worse) and will remember what you said last month (for better or worse). The “blue-state” aspect certainly isn’t to everyone’s taste, though for some people the sport of challenging the dominant ideology here is a reason in its own right to stay (good for them). The “college town” aspect means that there are some good, informed discussions and lively debates to be had, along with a bit of disdain for the ill-informed or intellectually lax.

To scratch that fundamental itch for community, you need to feel that there’s a place for you. Lots of people come, take a look around, and just don’t see where they’d fit in. Maybe they get such negative feedback from members that acceptance looks hopeless, and they don’t relish the role of perpetual outsider. Maybe they’re unwilling to make the adjustments that all new arrivals to a community need to make (every community has its rules, both explicit and implicit). And, of course, conflict is natural part of any community. It takes a certain amount of personal resilience to not let the occasional conflict sour the community experience for you.

I’m still here after 4 years and do not participate in any other Q&A or discussion forums. I’m a one site kinda girl. haha
Fluther is great fun, interesting, stimulating, yes, a community. I’m super easy going and rarely get pissy about anything, live and let live. :-)

I’ve been here 7 years and it’s been pretty good, for the most part.

What I like: the format of the site is simple. I have seen other sites that people referred to, and they’re confusing and hard to navigate. I like the social aspect. I feel like many Jellies are my friends, even though we’ve never met. A bunch of Jellies are on FB, which adds another dimension to our friendships.

I like that if I have a dilemma I can use Fluther to gather ideas and opinions. I visit Fluther several times a day, usually, clicking back and forth between FB and Fluther.

Some people very heatedly defend their opinions. I try not to get too caught up in that. I try to remind myself that these are opinions, and we don’t have to agree, nor are we obligated to defend them. I have my opinion, you have yours, let’s move on.

What I have not liked was the very heated religious questions. I am glad they ended. It was getting old fast.

I also wish Augie was still here as Manager. I liked her a lot.

Another thing I wish is that there would be more people asking and answering. It’s disappointing on a day like today, when I wasn’t around here for about 5 hours, and I log in and no new questions have been asked in General. Yes, there were about 3 new ones in Social and this one in Meta, which is nice, but it would be more stimulating if there were more.

What I like: Apparently everyone here has an IQ of 132.
What I don’t like: Except me! 129. :/

@Dutchess_III and I’m not tellin’... bright and good natured, good enough.

I need good 20 – 30 people to talk each day to balance out my need to tell every bit of my life to someone. I find that I use both Fluther and Answerbag. I once had a Yahoo Answers account but I missed the social interaction and it was took hard to level up and I kept forgetting my passwords.

Thoughtful responses to funny questions, funny responses to thoughtful questions, occasional thoughtful responses to thoughtful questions, grammar lessons, awful puns, recipes and… je ne sais quoi is what keeps me here. (Also, good questions, and my continuing quest to learn whether she likes me or not.)

What drives me away… boredom.

What keeps people here? The users.

What drives some away? The users.

Break out the heroin we’re all users. lol

I stay mostly because the people here aren’t assholes. I’ve been to some other sites but none of them has so many good and intelligent people like this site. At least jellies here have enough common sense not to flame or degrade others or act like 5-year-olds. I’ve seen enough of these things on other websites already.

Some say the small size is boring, but to me it’s an advantage. With this small size, I can get to know people more, and create a stronger relationship with them. Bigger size just confuses me. I can be lost.

One thing I don’t really like about Fluther, apart from some ideas others have pointed out and I agree, is the fact that older jellies seems to be so grumpy when new jellies mess up. Come on! They are learning the rope, give them a break. If what they do is wrong, just talk to them and show them the way, there’s no harm in doing this. Some old jellies don’t talk and just stay grumpy like the new jellies already know that is so wrong, while the new jellies continue their doings thinking nothing wrong has happened. And then “boom”! A conflict, and the new jellies are bewildered.

I just wish people would either stay or go without fucking bleating on about it.
This is a q&a site with a “community” vibe, not rehab.

Addiction. Everyone’s addicted to Fluther.

@jonsblond got it right.

I prefer Fluther over other Q&A sites because, typically, the members are more educated/intelligent and I’m not distracted by constant horrendous grammar and spelling. Most jellies don’t type and behave like a 13-year-olds, with a few exceptions. If I were to leave Fluther, it wouldn’t be for another Q&A site.

I’m not nearly as invested in Fluther as I once was. I don’t have a whole lot to contribute these days and I feel like I’m growing out of it and losing interest. Certain members’ shenanigans and narcissistic tendencies are just getting old and I find myself rolling my eyes at things people are saying around here far too often.

I still haven’t stopped coming around, but I feel it’s getting close. Let’s face it; I won’t be missed much. Only time will tell.

I get sucked into web forums but I never have more than one going on. Honestly, I’m probably close to taking off for a while. It’s been tumble weeds around here lately but that could change quickly.

Questions (and the responses) like this.

(And my ongoing morbid fascination with group process and the behavior of a more-or-less contained community.)

@ibstubro I’m not trying to be mean just for the sake of it, but I often see people lament the current state of Fluther and then say that it used to be better, like as if they’re some kind of exception.

Huh, @Symbeline?

Where did I except myself?

One of the things that I used to enjoy about Fluther the most was the frequent total derailments of questions. Mine and others. It’s been months since I’ve seen that happen, and I’m pretty sure it’s no longer allowed.

@ibstubro Sure it stil happens, even when mods are involved.

That’s not a derailment, @dappled_leaves, just a fun question.

There was a time when @Dutchess_III would lead “Who’s your favorite football player?” over into the abyss of baby snot without a second glance.

@ibstubro Sure, the question is fun – so is the derailment. My point is, the question was about the effects of combining certain foods, and it has become a discussion about New York geography and the joys of specific sausages. I have no problem with that at all. But it’s a good example of how some threads do still become derailed.

The joy of sausages? I see a coffee table book with varying varieties of sausage serving positions. LMAO!

One of the things that I used to enjoy about Fluther the most was the frequent total derailments of questions.

There was a time when Fluther didn’t have sections and every off topic answer was removed. People left when the sections were created and off topic answers were allowed. In the past so called fun questions weren’t allowed and neither were game questions. You think it’s bad now @ibstubro? I don’t think you realize how lucky you are. (not trying to be mean. just stating facts)

@dappled_leaves – In Social questions, the conversation is allowed to evolve and unfold. A derailment would be if someone started discussing topics other than what was being discussed (like “who’s your favorite football player”), or back and forth banter between 2 users that would be better suited for chat or PM. If that post were in General, then it would be a derailment to go on a tangent about the origin of sausages.

I don’t think it’s bad now, @jonsblond. I was questioning @Symbeline calling me out by name.

”@ibstubro I’m not trying to be mean just for the sake of it, but I often see people lament the current state of Fluther and then say that it used to be better, like as if they’re some kind of exception.”
Where did I except myself?

In response to my post which was nearly identical to @livelaughlove21‘s
“I’m not nearly as invested in Fluther as I once was. I don’t have a whole lot to contribute these days and I feel like I’m growing out of it and losing interest. Certain members’ shenanigans and narcissistic tendencies are just getting old and I find myself rolling my eyes at things people are saying around here far too often.”

“There was a time when @Dutchess_III would lead “Who’s your favorite football player?” over into the abyss of baby snot without a second glance.” The hell?? LOL!

Well, my granddaughter, Zoey is my favorite football player. Yes, she is as strong as she looks. The other day she climbed on her play pen. She was holding on to the rails with both hands and her feet slipped off the side so she was free-hanging. I kid you not, she pulled herself up with just her arms until she could put her feet back on the bottom rail.

Is that American football, or the more European soccer, @Dutchess_III?

She’s a cutey, I kid you’s not!

@hearkat Really, it does not help to have you explain it. I’ve had comments modded from Social questions for ever-so-slightly straying from the specific question, and so have others.

I am NOT complaining about this, so there is no need to be defensive. The rules are applied inconsistently, and that’s how it is. All I’m saying is that some threads do still derail.

It’s that nasty “Mukin football @ibstubro.

a.k.a. pussy rugby

* MeRkin *

Time out
Time out
Hurry up and wait
How the HELL can the last 10 minutes last an hour??

If the moderation is being questioned or challenged publicly, I think the team has the right to respond publicly, @dappled_leaves. It’s not about “defending”, it’s about communicating and clarifying, which we choose to do for the benefit of the community at large. My response was addressing your comment, but it wasn’t directed only to you.

Yes, we are not as consistent as we’d like to be, because we simply can’t see everything that is posted to the site, so some things get missed. This is why we always ask Jellies to flag anything that they feel is questionable and to not respond to it in the thread (it isn’t even necessary to comment “flagged” when there’s a spam post).

The other issue about inconsistency that has been an issue since moderation began on this site, is that virtually every Jelly’s interpretation of the guidelines varies to some degree from everyone else’s. We have worked behind the scenes to ensure consistent interpretation amongst the team members, and we use these opportunities to help anyone who reads the post better understand the official position.

Thirdly, sometimes users don’t notice the reason for their comment being modded. We’ve had people complain that they were on-topic, when the comment had been pulled for a different reason, such as being flame-bait or writing standards or as a response to something else that had been pulled rendering it out-of-context.

@hearkat Okey dokey. Usually, when I try to “communicate and clarify” it is interpreted as “stirring the pot”, but I guess when the mod team does it, it’s super helpful, even if off-topic.

None of what you said contradicts anything I said. So… thanks for weighing in? And hey, you already get 3 GAs for doing so! Yay!

We’re in Meta; so it’s not really off-topic.

“Stirring the pot” is usually when someone initiates the conversation or broaches the topic. I will again admit that I did that with the ‘not a social network’ post. Generally, it has always been the moderators’ preference to handle things via PM and emails. This is why the vast majority of our public moderation statements are in response to questions or comments that others make about the guidelines or the moderation or the team members – which you interpreted above as being defensive.

If those who have questions or concerns contact the Mod team privately, we will respond privately. If someone expresses those thoughts publicly, it only makes sense for us to respond to them within the same thread, so that all who see the question can also see the answer.

And Meta posts are supposed to turn into Lurve parties anyway, amiright?

I did not realize that this was a lurve party.

I do not have a silly hat, and I do not feel the lurve. The noisemakers, on the other hand, are practically intolerable?

I׳m stuck.

@ibstubro have you contacted the ministry of silly hats?

I think “silly walks” is the one where they is someone “stuck” !

I came for the food, and stayed for the fun.

I think we need a cocktail room in the chat zone. haha

@Kardamom Come for the company. Stay for the pie!

Did someone say “pie?”

Glupbdbt tsch tsch. Thorry I canth tok, I’m itten pie rot now.

Okay, that sinks it, somebody propose we open a saloon and grill in this town.
I shall be hostess and @Kardamom will be the cook and @jca can keep the books and @stanleybmanly can be bartender and we will have pie on the menu. lol

There will be pie.

A pie for a pie, only makes the whole world hungry.

High apple pie in the skyyyyyoh.

Somebody’s gotta be the gol durned farmer! This town needs a sodbuster. And it ain’t a’gonna be me; that’s hard work!

Don’t expect me to be a shepherd, either.

Maybe I’ll run the town’s newspaper.

Fluther the party town. I’m glad I’m here.

Anyone packin’ Rhubarb pie will be shot on sight. lol

I’d like to hear more from some like @ibstubro & @livelaugh, my bud from OK who never posts. Where’d the vamps go?

I want peach pie. It is, after all, summertime.

Key Lime or lemon for me please.

I WANT SOME F-ING PIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!%$&(((((((((((((((___________

@jca Peach pie YES. Apple pie can be accomplished year round, but this is peach time. We have an apple tree that yields 4 shopping bags of golden delicious apples. Not the best pie fruit, but the wife makes marvelous pies, and an unbelievable apple cake that’s so simple to make, that she builds gatherings here around them. The cake is moist and full of nuts, served warm with vanilla ice cream. We give away a lot of apples by extorting percentages of the goodies made from the recipients.

I’ll take the rhubarb pie as long as it’s rhubarb and apple. Or blackberry and apple. Or steak and kidney or cheese and onion or a pork pie. Okay now I’ve gone into pie overdrive.

Don’t forget chicken pot pies.

The chicken pox pie trend has gone viral. ;-o

@Brian1946 Really?

Yes! We need savory pies! I want a shrimp pot pie with lots of fresh peas and some blue cheese melted on the top.

Now, where’s my damned silly hat??

Here’s one for @KNOWITALL!

@Coloma, hater of silly goose depictions gets a Mother of a hat.

This question turn into some kind of meat pie party?

what was the question?

PARTY?
PAR-TAE!

Go with it, Squeek!

Squeek Kebobs!

Yeah? well time for me to say good by, got to hit the hay.

Hay pie.

You’re the horsest with the morestest, @Dutchess_III.

I certainly don’t have the time, nor inclination to join another Q&A site. I only use fluther! I have been driven away in the past by psychos here or just rude obnoxious people. (Mind you, I can be obnoxious too). What keeps me here? The wonderful people who do remain. I have had some questions answered with such care and kindness.

On the negative side, you are right @ibstubro (If I understood you correctly and to add to that point).

Many here who just click answer, click answer… day after day, don’t really answer a question. I feel that puts people off from asking. For me, to ask a question is to have as many viewpoints, ideas and slants as possible. Just because two answered and the answers seemed ‘okay’ does not mean there was no room for more answers. When you answer all day and all night and all week and month, you are probably less inclined to answer as comprehensively as possible. Some might even say ‘yes I have done that’ or ‘no’.

Why do that? If answering has become a labour for one, then sign out and come back when you are ready for more.

One of the biggest things that drove people away, new people I mean was this whole ‘I am a senior member so I shit ice-cream bull’. That was nauseating, but people entertained ‘them’ like one does elderly sorts losing their marbles. I’m not sure if that still occurs or not.

(as I am around less and less)

Anyway, I have always come back and always will stick around. I hope this site goes from strength to strength and the only way to do that, is welcome new people and mean it!