Is this normal? (read details) [possibly NSFW]?

Have you tried taking things into your own hands, so to speak to help relieve the tension ?
If your young and healthy,or even just healthy not unusual to think of sex quite often.
As to your question before I was married it would be very long periods between but have been married now for over 25 years so not that long now, but our work life does get in the way from time to time.

So to speak, try masturbating…a lot. That will solve part of the problem and perhaps make it easier to be more selective and less obsessed.

I am old enough now so that I don’t think about sex in quite the same way as I did when I was younger.

Absolutely nothing wrong with masturbating either by your own hand or a toy,relieves a lot of built up tension, as long as it’s done in private and doesn’t affect your day to day life, try it, it may help a lot.

I do masturbate a lot, it makes me even more obsessed because I want to make those fantasies real. Ugh, it’s so annoying that even just looking at this for one single second gets me all wet. A single stupid second!
Masturbating has become kind of boring, since I know there’s noone I could get to do all that stuff I think of. I’ll create an imaginary friend, I’m going nuts. I said nuts.
Ughh can a human being become crazy because of this?
Tired of my own fingers, really.

I’ve gone for over two years with no sexual partners other than myself at a couple points in my adult life. This was during ages when my body was prime reproductive age, so I was very horny – but I wouldn’t consider it obsessive.

As someone who has lived out most of my fantasies at other times in my life, I found that the reality never matched the fantasy. If you’re not satisfied by masturbation, and you’re not interested in pursuing sexual relations with anyone who doesn’t meet some unrealistic standard you’ve set, you’ve painted yourself into a corner.

It sounds like you may need some therapy to explore the reason behind creating unattainable goals for yourself and are making yourself “nuts” in your words.

@hearkat It’s not unrealistic, it’s just that I don’t like someone that much. When I was still together with my ex I was great with him (before things looked like the texas chainsaw massacre), it’s possible to like someone real again. (I wouldn’t go back to therapy for this, I love my impossible standards. They’ve helped me achieve many things in general)

The main purpose of this question isn’t finding out why I’ll never get laid because noone is what I want, it’s how I’ll stay sane and not hit on the little blue people in the kitchen.

Too many cocks spoil the br…that went wrong a bit

@bluish Welcome to the XY chromosome holders’ world. :-)
At any one moment 33.3% of the male population under 50 has those same thoughts. (That number was scientifically determined by assuming half the population is married and at any one moment ⅓ of the world is sleeping.)

That desire means you are young and healthy. Think how sad it would be if you were on the other end of the spectrum and had no desire whatsoever.
I say savor it and act upon your urges if you wish and feel you have the right person.
This will pass. Hopefully later than sooner.

@LuckyGuy Thanks, nice answer. (haha hopefully later than sooner?) That means I’m not a psycho, right?

@LuckyGuy So, when do the sex thoughts start to go away?

“I don’t know anyone sexy enough, so I go out quite often but still I don’t seem to find what I want. They’re either too young, too old, too creepy (said by a girl who finds the Joker sexy as hell), too shy, too sleazy. Am I too picky?”

“it’s just that I don’t like someone that much”

Maybe you have to know someone’s personality to be attracted to them. A lot of people are like that. You mentioned Tom Hiddleston- in some ways it’s easier to be attracted to a celebrity than to a stranger in real life, because you “know” them through their body of work and interviews, etc. I definitely have to like someone’s personality to be attracted to them. Without personality, even the hottest guy is a no-go. Case in point, I have a celebrity crush on Steve Buscemi but Brad Pitt does nothing for me.

You could approach hookups differently, and instead just try to meet new people with no end goal in mind. Maybe attraction will organically happen out of a new friendship.

Also if my hunch is right, and their personality is what turns you on, you should look into erotic fanfiction. That sounds like a joke but I’m totally dead serious. The top 10% is better written than any published erotica I’ve read, and it’s all about your favorite characters. (Unlike porn, which is all creepy anonymous strangers.)

@Haleth Buscemi? God you’re awesome. He is so good. Not that I have a crush on him, but he’s amazing.

@Adirondackwannabe Hahahaha, thanks! I’ll take it. When I tell people it’s usually like, “haha, Haleth, you’re such a movie buff.” They think I’m exaggerating or being ironic. Nope. Totally dead serious. Steve Buscemi is the man!

I’m nut’s for Tarantino flicks too. He’s seriously twisted. And he can seriously do sexy. Selma with the snake was hot.

I think we’re running this thread off course, but agreed!

This reminds me of a story. There was a psychology (or maybe it was a behavioral economics) experiment where all the students in the room randomly drew cards between 0 and 100. They weren’t allowed to look at them and put them in a headband that displayed the number to everyone else. The goal was to pair up with the person with the highest number. One girl in the room had a perfect 100 on her head and she was flooded with people looking to pair with her. She knew she had a high number so kept holding out for a top score. Everyone paired up and she was left with one of the lowest partners in the room because he was all that was left.

There’s nothing wrong with being choosy. Being IMPOSSIBLY choosy, is by definition irrational and harmful. Dudes who are “perfect 10’s” know it. Having tons of women constantly hitting on them tends to ruin their perspective when it comes to women. With all my buddies growing up, I’ve noticed the better looking/charming they are, the worse they treat hookups/girlfriends/wives etc. For them, very beautiful women are a dime/dozen. I’m not saying you have to settle for a guy you don’t like, but you might not want to rule people out so quickly. There are a lot of above-average guys out there who know how to make a woman feel special (especially in the bedroom). They may not be underwear models that can grate cheese on their abs, but I’m pretty sure most of those guys are narcissistic, gym-junky tools.

@Adirondackwannabe I can’t tell you when the sex thoughts start to go away. Mine are still as intrusive as ever – even though I shoot only blanks.

@bluish That desire is like a condiment on your food. Sure, you can eat a hamburger without ketchup or drink your tea without a bit of sugar, but the meal is that much more enjoyable if you add a little spice.
Right now you have the right mix of testosterone and estrogen juicing through your blood stream. Enjoy it. Sadly, it does not stay forever.

@LuckyGuy ——with that xy chromosome thing before, you meant I’m like guys now? I know they say all they think about is sex but… most guys I know would fuck anyone, I’m definitely not like that.——

@Haleth Yaaaay someone who knows exactly what I’m talking about! (fanfics work but not thaaat much now, it’s like I’m becoming less and less affected. Some voice is telling me “you’ll never get anyone real”)

@gorillapaws That makes sense and… means I’m doomed?

and again @Haleth There’s something weird about how I choose guys: they have to be good looking (I know many will consider me shallow but I can’t care about that now) and maybe I won’t give a damn if the guy is comletely stupid, but that’s for the first half hour we’ll spend talking when we first meet. Then, if every conversation I start ends in two seconds because he can’t talk about anything except his car or his favorite football team, ugh… I try to convince myself that it doesn’t matter since it’s 99,9% sure I won’t start dating the person… Still, I can’t. It’s awful, really. I’m trying to go for the meaningless night with a stranger but it seems that, no matter how horny I might be, if he says something stupid I’ll laugh at him and that’s not what one should do in situations like that. And if I actually find the guy, I’ll be so totally freaked out after it’s over, because I’ll sure want to see him again and that’d probably not be what he wants. Ugh. Also, it’s so difficult to wait until I’m in a relationship again, it’s not what I want right now, I just got out of one that lasted almost two years and the last ten months were like a horror movie, I can’t do that again.

Maybe I’ll renovate the house.

@bluish I meant you were describing the feelings and thoughts of many guys: thinking of past experiences at inopportune times, seeing a woman and wondering what it would be like, ....
We don’t act upon it but the thoughts are there.

“Maybe I’ll renovate the house.” Good call!

I am not you and cannot make this call for you but I believe you are a bit too demanding in what, or rather, who you are looking for. You will never find perfection but you can find friendship.

I have a friend who does not have what American culture would call the perfect (or even average) body shape. When she was out looking for a little physical contact, many times she would not even get a second look, let alone a second chance. But, she had a very positive attitude both toward life and toward her self.
If she found a gentleman she was interested in she would say something along the lines of “Look, I know I am not your dream date and I know I am not exactly what you are looking for, not being a perfect 10 or probably what you would consider a 7, but then again you are no prince charming either. We both have certain wants and needs that we could satisfy for each other on a short term basis if you want to consider it”.
Many times she would end up either going home with him or he with her and while the majority of times these ended up being a one night thing, many times they led to second dates, third dates and longer lasting relationships.
She doesn’t do this anymore however, she ended up marrying her last date and now is happily married living in a suburban neighborhood with a husband, two kids, two dogs, umpteen cats and a great outlook on life.

@LuckyGuy Oh I see… that’s interesting.

@rojo It takes me about a month to find a decent pair of jeans or decide which lipstick is red enough. I spent about three months finding the right guitar. This now miiiight take a little longer.

If I were you I would be contacting an escort…..