Possibly I have the 'creepiest' neighbors ever?

For the most part I would kill them with kindness. If you see them on the street, go right up to them, stand in front of them and say, “hello! how are you doing?” and smile. Better to make them uncomfortable than for them to make you uncomfortable.

If someone peeks in my window, I would take my clothes off and go get as close to the window as possible. And smile.

Is moving an option? Do you rent or own? In other words, are you invested in trying to change this relationship?

Kill ‘em with kindness. It might be rebuffed, but sooner or later if you continue, something will break, and you’ll get your chance.

In the meantime, come here. We like ya!

I have a somewhat similar problem with a neighbor who owns a vicious dog. The fence between us is rotten, and it’s a problem. So far they are uncommunicative, but lately the dog hasn’t been out as much.

@snowberry yes! was thinking of that neighbor of yours and the dog as I wrote this!!

I sympathize.

Many years ago when I was a teenager some new folks moved into the house next door to us. It was in the fall, and later in the fall – at Halloween – someone egged their house. (For the record, it wasn’t me; I’ve never egged anyone’s property. I also never knowingly hung with anyone who did, so I have no idea who vandalized their house.) My father was outside the next day and noticed one of them (the neighbors were a middle-aged woman and her mother) trying with great difficulty and little success to scrape the dried egg from a window. He suggested to me that it would be a neighborly thing to do for me to take a ladder, a bucket and some cleaning supplies and offer to help. Knowing that my dad’s “suggestion” was in the nature of an implicit command, I actually agreed with him and complied willingly.

I offered my services, the offer was accepted, and I spent the better part of the day cleaning dried egg from their windows and woodwork. The neighbors hardly said a word to me and did not even thank me after I was done. I thought that was sort of odd. They also never said a word to my parents.

We found out later and through other neighbors, since the neighborly relationship never – ever – got off the ground with those two, that they automatically assumed that I had egged the house and that my father had simply made me clean it as punishment. They never even acknowledged that if that had been so, he would at least have been attempting to rectify the situation. No. They assumed that my parents were raising petty criminals and foisting them on the neighborhood, and that I was a delinquent in the making.

You just can’t win with some people.

Get interactive with them. Go next door and ask if they have a good recipe for _______. If they do, try it. If they say no, eventually, make some whatever, bring them a njicely printed copy of the recipe, with a generous sampling. Tell them that someone provided you a recipe, and since you knew they didn’t have it, perhaps they would like to try this one.
Be very cheerful. Use your very best Stepford Wife face when you are around them.
Don’t be afraid to ask them for help; advice, recipes, where to find something around town, and – what do you think – type things. They will thrive on your helplesness, and soon look forward to seeing you come by. In vite them over at least once, and make a reaon to leave the room, so they can snoop a bit. So what? It seems to keep them going.

^^ might work!

Does this mean you are back in the UK?

Being an American who lives part time in England, what I have found is that the neighbor-culture there is a bit different than in the US. A lot of housing is spaced close together, so there is an etiquette where you don’t (noticeably) peek into neighbors’ gardens or windows. So, yes, these women are acting oddly.

If I had to take a wild guess, it sounds as if they have a limited social life and turn to you for a bit of excitement in their day. One of our neighbors does this. It may also be that they are old fashioned and don’t like the fact that you have an SO to whom you are not married.

Like others, my recommendation is to treat them in a friendly manner. Do you know their names and they know yours? That might be a place to start.

Fuck that. They look in your windows, and are straight up rude to you? Two old biddies? They probably have nothing better to do.

I’d confront them. If they look in your window make sure they know you see them. Ask them WTF? Report them as “peeping Tom’s”. When you hear them whispering, yell “I hear you”.

You shouldn’t change your life to appease assholes. I don’t care how old they are. Tell them to fuck off.

Obviously, I’m not a passive person who is nice to people who go out of their way to be mean.

When you see them staring in the window, I’d stare back and maybe get naked. But that’s just me.

When they stare in the window you could simply smile and say “Can I help you?”. I’m a reasonably intolerant person but in this case I would suggest smiling and being exaggeratedly friendly might be of more help than being antagonistic, even if only for yourself. And the woman down the road who you would like to meet, what about just simply knocking on the door and inviting her over for coffee, I’ve done it myself in the past, we didn’t end up to be bosom buddies but that wasn’t the object, it was enjoyable and an expression of neighbourliness.

I think because they are older they probably expect you to be the friendly introducing one? I don’t know I could be wrong.

I think that when it comes to neighbors, friendly is a much better way to go than stinky. I think these old ladies probably just need an excuse to become friends. It is worth a shot.

I was going to suggest a 50,000 candle power spot light and blind them. But @Ashleigh’s answer sounded better.

Give them a gift of binoculars? But perhaps they’d be too obtuse to get the point.

Whatever Happened to Baby Jane…much.
Beat them about the head & shoulders with a big black dildo, then claim madness runs in the family & settle everything over a nice cup of tea, hoorah!

Here in the southern US it is usually the existing residents who make the overtures toward the new neighbors and welcome them in but I think where you are it may be a little more conservative or entrenched in their ways.
So, try to reach out to the nice neighbor. There has to be a reason you have concluded that they are nice so maybe it will be a little easier to introduce yourself and get to know them. I know it is hard for some of us who are more introverted and not comfortable with starting conversations but if you look at where you are now after a year what do you really have to lose if you get the cold shoulder. I would think that if you can make one neighbor a friend then there would be more acceptance by the others although I would not count on the spinsters to ever coming around.

Stand outside in the dark smiling at them. Do so every night.

Just have a pot of water simmering, so if they come out, you can ask them in for tea.