How is it possible for someone to enter your dreams?

It’s not possible.

What might be going on, then? It seems to me there are two main possibilities: either he guessed that you had dreamed about him and wanted to probe for information, or he is sincere but delusional. In both cases, the “fact” that he “remembers” more than you do is a key clue. Things he remembers that you do not are in fact inconsistencies in your two experiences. They are evidence that you were not in the same dream. But the two of you are spinning them as experiences that only one of you remembers. (This is how folie à deux and related phenomena begin.)

Maybe you both had explicit dreams about each other on the same night. That’s not strange at all, and is in fact more likely given how close the two of you are. It’s still just a coincidence, though. And if you are both capable of lucid dreaming, then it would be even easier to convince yourselves that you are capable of sharing dreams. Lucid dreamers are able to exert a certain amount of control over their dream environment; so if they dream about themselves willfully entering someone else’s dreams, it will feel more like they really did manage to do so.

Furthermore, lucid dreaming inhibits the natural reaction to recognize the implausibility and incongruity of one’s dreams upon waking by forcing the dreamer to remain within certain rational parameters while still asleep. Thus it can be harder for a lucid dreamer to distinguish between fantasy and reality—despite the fact that a key feature of lucid dreaming is knowing that you are asleep and dreaming.

For your sake, I hope your special someone is sincere but delusional. If it’s the first option, then he seems a bit manipulative. Then again, maybe he feels the same way about you that you feel about him, suspects that the feeling is mutual, and is just trying to confirm that before going any further. That would still be a bit dishonest of him, but maybe more forgivable. If nothing comes of this, however, he might just be looking for an ego boost.

Astral travel is possible.

It’s not possible for someone to enter your dreams. You, however, can imagine them in your dreams, just like you might when you daydream about someone.

This means that anything that the person you’re dreaming about says or does comes from your imagination. It is not something that the real-life person actually says or does.

This is an important distinction for anyone who cares about telling the difference between fantasy and reality.

Achoo

@talljasperman No, it is not. We’ve been over this before. I’ve even proposed experiments that would allow us to verify your claims. But you’ve never once taken me up on any of them, which suggests that even you know that you’re just fantasizing.

He is ‘pulling your leg’ as we used to say. When he asked if you’d dreamed about him recently, the word ‘recently’ shows you have discussed your dreams with him previously. He was interested and wanted to take things further to see how you would react, or perhaps to draw you into revealing more than you intended.

Welcome to Fluther.

I’m glad that others have already attempted to debunk this absurd and highly manipulative notion that your friend has given you. (I don’t take a soft view on his action or suggestion. If he really believes what he says, then he’s even more invasive than I think, isn’t he?) In reasonably sane and independent-minded persons who are in general control of their own sleep-wake patterns – and sleeping alone – no one enters our dreams but those we put their ourselves, willingly or unwillingly, by ourselves. Which is not to say that what your friend says is absolutely impossible, only not in the way that he suggests.

That is, I believe that under certain conditions controlled by others one’s dreams can be somewhat manipulated. I’m not talking technicolor, high-production-value dreams like the movie Inception, but something along that idea. Given the right conditions of sleep deprivation, drugs or torture and other such mind control, and given a certain amount of psychic distress or inducement (including hypnosis) or general weak-mindedness of the subject to begin with, I don’t doubt that it may be possible for someone to “insert himself” into someone else’s dream. But that would be a rare thing, and not likely to be happening to someone who still lives a more or less normal life.

If you’re able to get to and from school on your own, pick out your own clothes and dress in ways that don’t cause people to stop and stare on the street, hold conversations with others who can understand what you say and respond appropriately – and which don’t cause third parties to wonder who you could possibly be talking to – and if you’re sleeping in your own bed alone and without any kind of hypnotic suggestion, tape loop or special bedtime story or suggestion about “what to dream about”, then you’re putting your friend into your own erotic fantasy. And that is completely normal, natural and nothing to be ashamed about.

But it’s also something that I would not care to share with someone who is trying in any way to assert control over my mind. You might want to think about this friend from a distance for awhile, if that’s possible.

Why does the term “cold reading” come to mind?

@jerv I was just thinking the same thing! We have a psychic connection~

@icantbeloved Cold reading is a set of techniques that psychics use to draw someone out in conversation. They start with a vague and open-ended question (“have you been dreaming about me lately?”). Then they lead you through a conversation with more open-ended questions and statements, based on what you’re telling them, your body language, etc.

Cold reading is a combination of educated guessing, paying attention, and showmanship. There’s nothing psychic about it. It leads you to tell someone more than you realize, so their educated guesses sound creepily accurate.

The guy you like sounds manipulative. It’s not possible to enter another person’s dream, or drag someone into your dreams. If you believed him about the dreams, his manipulations seem to be working on you. How old are you? Because honestly, this whole situation makes him sound creepy, and I’m a little worried.

If you don’t listen to anything else I say, keep this in mind. It sounds like he’s trying to manipulate you into having sex with him. And if he is willing to do that, he could place you in other, dangerous situations.

I think you could use an outside perspective on this guy, from someone in real life. Is there anyone you know who is sensible and trustworthy? Please tell them everything you have told us, along with what you now know about cold reading.

Curious that “he says that YOU dragged him into Your Dreams”?
Yeah, very manipulative.
Try this next time you dream…..
Repremand him in your dream tell him that he has no respect for your privacy nor for your feelings. Tell him that he is a coward who would rather manipulate others than be honest and caring and respectful of another.
Tell him that you don’t want a “master” and “slave” relationship where one is holding power perceived or not over another.
Then see what his demeanor is after that!
He is in effect forcing himself onto you.
In real life you would distance yourself from this type of person, so why not in dreams too?
One cannot make you dream anything that you yourself do not want too dream of.
Pray for protection before you retire at night from evading entities whether perceived or not.