What do you think of my planned retirement prank?

I think it’s a great joke! What are they going to do, fire you? :-)

Maybe I am in the minority, but I squirm and look for the exit sign during pranks.

I’m with @gailcalled about pranks, and I don’t really see the point of this particular one anyway. Do you want people to think you got a real Rolex?
I don’t get it. Please explain.

Since you asked, the response depends upon the company atmosphere. It’s one thing when the employees are close-knit and have a sense of humor. It is another when this is not the case. You may be retiring, but the prank may backfire for those left in the wake and unaware that it is a joke.

Honestly, I’m the type of person who wouldn’t be able to tell a fake Rolex from a real one, so unless your plan also includes making it crystal clear to EVERYBODY that this is a fake, it could end up falling rather flat.

And by crystal clear I mean having the paperwork for the fake one at hand and passed around at some point for the clueless (like me.)

Only you know your company and the other employees well enough to know how this will go over but to me it seems questionable at best.

But I don’t know your company or it’s employees.

I don’t get it – do you want others to think you got an expensive Rolex, or to think that you got a fake Rolex?

Is Rolex still a thing?

What can they do? Go out on your own terms with laughter!

I think that it would take an expert to tell that this watch is a fake. This particular model sells for over $30K

I told my co-workers and management that I don’t want a retirement party. But I could see that they wanted one so to humor them I agreed to it.

All of the retirement parties I’ve been to have been pretty lame with pranks and roasts directed to the retiree. Knowing my coworkers it is likely that they are planning some stunt for me. Perhaps I just might get the last laugh if they thought even for a second that the Rolex and the letter were real.

All I hope for is that I can catch them off guard see the aghast looks on their faces.

I have no intension of letting anyone think that the Rolex is real after a very short time (maybe 5 minutes).

Have fun at your party @gondwanalon and enjoy retirement : ^)

Not really understanding what the point of this particular prank is.

I don’t get it, but it is after all your retirement.
As an alternative, I might suggest shaking hands with everybody, hugging a few, having a couple of drinks and promising to keep in touch and then doing it.
But I am decades away from retirement, so what do I know?

You could write your self a severance check for the full amount that is in your bank account.

The joke would be – if the new CEO gets wind of the joke, and decides it would be nice, in the future, to retire people like that. Everyone but you might end up with a real Rolex.
Even funnier, they have a real gold watch to present to you, but the one you have is so elaborate, they feel bad, and whisper amongst themselves that they should just return it, and not tell you.
I think your joke would roll better if you end it with something endearing. Have the watch delivered with a bouqet of roses, one for each woman or even each employee expected to attend. (Maybe two or three extra, just in case.) After reading the letter, state that you’d like to share the joy. Go one by one to each and hand them a rose. It would be terrific show of good will. Then as you let the truth be known, they would be already bribed to not hate you. This is suggested to you in keeping with the same humor intended for your prank.

One question. What if the CEO shows up with a real presentation?

For those of you who don’t get it, I’ll say again that our previous CEO was cheap even though she made around $5 million per year. My current bosses are also cheap. They might consider giving me a $20 gift certificate to Starbucks for a retirement gift (no exaggeration). They even asked me if they could do my the retirement party at my house for a BBQ. So I figure that just the thought of me receiving something of real value from the company is just so out of their comprehension that it would blow their minds if it were to really happen.

Also our new CEO will suddenly be seen as a very very generous man. That is until I pop their bubble. HA!

Can you dig it?

@Here2_4 Thank you for the suggestion. Believe me their is no way that they would give me a real gold watch. There was one x-ray tech who retired after 40 years with the company. She got a watch but it wasn’t gold or anything like a Rolex.

If the current CEO shows up then I’ll be SOL. The joke will be on me. HA!

@gondwanalon

Yeah, we get that your bosses are cheap. I just don’t get what’s really prankish or, honestly, funny about this.

Be careful no one gets caught in the eye by a runaway tumbleweed.

Don’t find it funny but I’m more of a witty person than a prank person.

I think it’s a great and funny idea. That presentation box for the watch will be the cherry atop a very funny sundae. The letter of commendation needs some work, and the gag is so cool that you should solicit help here in crafting it. One hazard to consider is the possibility that your immediate supervisor and lab manager might already know in advance of the cheap token planned for you. In fact wouldn’t one or both of them be involved with “presenting” it? You’ve been to other parties so you know the drill. Perhaps you could arrange in the letter for the watch to be the gift from the grateful mayor of your city for your dedicated service to your community in the performance of your job. Or pick some ancillary company or group affiliated with your company whose members won’t attend your ceremony. This way, if the CEO does show up, you can fool him or her as well. Someone you trust will have to be in on it. It would really be cool if some “messenger” could deliver your elegantly and expensively wrapped package in the middle of the party. Be sure to accept or open the company token first. Then open the gag gift to the amazement of all in attendance. The whole thing is a perfect commentary on the “thrifty” attitude of your “betters”. On the other hand, there are those here who will argue that you should be grateful to your “betters” for any recognition at all. Sounds like a hoot.

@gondwanalon yes, I totally get it and think it is very funny : ^)

Thank you all for your impute.

@stanleybmanly You’ve got good ideas. I have loose ends but will attempt to tighten it up as I get more information about the so called retirement party.

Perhaps I’ll get a trusted colleague to be in cahoots with me on this to help to pull it off.

Perhaps I’ll just make up a fictitious award. For example I could be awarded the “Martha P. Smith Award” which is presented occasionally to company employees who exhibit the highest standards of customer service and live the company values on a daily basis over at least a 10 year period. Print it on a believable award sheet. No one would likely admit that they have never heard of it and by the time someone suspects anything the prank will be over.

I’d do it just for the hell of it.. What are they gonna do? Fire you..? Then you could get retirement AND unemployment (yowza!).

So, did the prank go, or flop?

It turned out far better than I hopped for. Here’s a picture of me (caution I’m old and ugly looking) with the watch.

I had the currier deliver the watch to my supervisor (he was in on the prank).

I was so nervous because my prank seemed to be a so over the top. My goodness who is going to believe that I deserve a $30K gold Rolex for retirement (I worried)? To my dismay and delight, everyone bought it! My fake teary-eyed astonishment must have helped. But then I felt so sorry for the bad thing that I had done (especially when my supervisor sent thank you e-mails to the head honcho of the lab as well as the hospital president and CEO) and I didn’t have the nerve to speak the truth. So I just told a couple people and the truth will spread like a wide fire. Soon people I didn’t even know were talking about it. One women sarcastically asked me in the hallway, “So, how do you like your gold Rolex?”. I tried to say that I like is OK but instead we both suddenly burst out laughing. And what’s wrong with a little laughter now and then even if it is on company time.

I didn’t feel bad that my boss sent the thank you e-mails because the recipients were on vacation and by the time they got back, I will be gone. HA! Sweet!

Everyone were such good sports about it. It felt good to leave them laughing.

That’s terrific. I’m glad for you that it went so well. Congrats.

@gondwanalon You’re kind of cute.

@janbb HA! Cute like this mole rat? Adorable.

Is that your son?

@janbb is right. You have one of those genuine, happy, warm smiles which always make people attractive. You look like a very nice man to know, even have for a neighbor. Hard to believe such a person could mastermind such a diabolical stunt, but it sounds to have gone off very well, and lots of fun for those who really matter. Happy New Year! Happy new retirement!

@Here2_4 Well bless your heart. You and @janbb are so kind. Thank you for the well wishes and everyone for impute. I needed your help to pull this off.

Happy and healthy new year!

Haha, the girl behind attempting to look busy, multitasking & striking a pose :D

@ucme At that clinical lab you had better be doing 3 or 4 things at the same time or you will fall behind. Of course we always made time for goofing off too.

Goofing off, a fine tradition :)

@janbb

I think what makes him look so cute is that mischievous glint in the eye which presages lots of good natured devilish fun.