What are some real life spoilers or secrets?
like that Santa doesn’t exist. Or that you need to fill up the snow blower with gas sometime. Or hanging up your bath towels leads to marital bliss.
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50 Answers
Love doesn’t last forever.
Never suck on a yellow snowball, lemonade it ain’t.
@ucme Really sorry if you found out the hard way.
It is never what you say, but what you do.
Hold out for the right woman (or man depending on your POV) how ever long it takes.
If you are not prepared to kill until the enemy begs you to stop, don’t send in the army.
Always keep your sense of humour; sometimes it may be all you have.
@josie Or “other”, or “none of the above”. This is the 21st century; it’s not always a binary thing any more.
I like this one. Get use to feeling stupid. It’s a sign of growth.
@jerv
Sure it is. It’s just that certainty bothers a lot of people these days.
@josie Maybe I’ve just seen more and weirder stuff than you have.
@jerv
Maybe
But I sort of doubt it.
There is no God.
Except me.
You will have the same ongoing argument with your spouse your entire marriage.
After prostate surgery you’ve got a 50% chance of being incontinent, having ED, or both.
Every surgeon tells you they have 90% success rate with no negative side effects. 90% of them are liars.
Pillows get fluffy in the dryer.
Karma doesn’t exist. It’s often the most kind people that get the short end of the stick in life.
We are not aware of our last time experiencing something in most cases.
Also, we are all going to die pretty soon.
But we will wake tomorrow and go about our day as though those two facts are false.
Success isn’t always permanent. There’s no point in comparing your failure and others’ success.
Also, to answer the question.
Spoiler alert: We’re all going to die. No, really.
There is no such thing as a Styrofoam cup.
The Styrofoam corporation does not make cups.
Beer contains female hormones.
Chilean Seabass does not really exist.
It is called that because it is thought that it’s true name, Patagonian Toothfish, would be too difficult for many to shall we say swallow.
The cartilage in your nose never stops growing.
The mayonnaise seeming to ooze so beautifully from that flawless burger in that photo is likely Elmer’s glue.
Your organs are not carefully put back in place after your post mortem.
In fact your brain can end up in your abdomen if it suits the M.E. at the time.
Most “truffle oil” contains no truffles.
Your five litre Mustang actually displaces about 4.6l depending on year and engine option.
We collect the butter left in the dish after you leave the restaurant and use it in dishes cooked later.
If you seem severely impaired I use less and less actual alcohol in your drinks if you keep demanding more.
This question is better than PostSecret.
Water isn’t vegan.
Hell, it isn’t even kosher.
The microscopic organisms contained therein did not give you permission to consume them.
Now I’m glad I order things without butter. Not that I trust that restaurants follow my wishes on that every time. The more I know about restaurants the worse it gets.
Try to be nice to everyone. It’s not going to hurt you to say hello to the janitor or the security guard.
When dealing with the police or any civil servant, try to be nice to them, too. You’re going to get way less help if you’re rude, nasty or pushy.
If you want to get glassware to shine like new, soak it in water with a little bleach.
@Megan64: Yes, you can wash down pillows and comforters in the machine, as long as you plan to dry them in dryer to fluff them up.
@SecondHandStoke My world is shattered…
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Up until about 10 years ago there really was no “permanent record”. “That’s going on your permanent record!” was just an idle threat to keep you in line.
Now there is one. Don’t take selfies holding a beer, wine or martini glass, cigarette or a gun.
roaches don’t eat sugar. a roach trapped in sugar will starve to death.
If you ever come to NYC and get the hair brained notion you want to see the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade, save yourself some time and money and stay home and watch it on TV. Unless you wake up at the crack of dawn and get there around 6:00 a.m., you’ll be so far from the floats that you’ll barely see them, you’ll be freezing and you’ll really get a better view from your living room or bedroom TV in your jammies, smelling the turkey baking in the oven.
@LuckyGuy
Then my work here is done.
No, it’s not…
One day, I shall be able to buff my brogues with my ballsack, should I so wish.
Long way off yet, but age, along with gravity, can be such a bitch :D
PETA.
Do I have to say any more?
The aptly named Porsche Cayman is deliberately detuned so it’s performance doesn’t embarrass 911 owners.
Honda does the same thing. In Japan and the UK there are Civic and Accord models that will handily outperform USDM Acuras.
These worldbeaters are simply not made available to residents of North America.
This sort of marketing forward thinking is nothing less than criminal.
Also: If you have an E36 BMW M3 in US trim you got decaf compared to what is offered to the rest of the world.
Absolutely unacceptable.
@SecondHandStoke I thought that the EDM/JDM was partly because we have lower octane fuel (not just how they measure it, but actually less knock-resistant), partly because we can’t abide by the harsh ride that comes from a performance-tuned suspension and thus detune the handling for comfort, and a little bit because NHTSA has crash test requirements that other places don’t; requirements that tend to add weight.
1. It doesn’t matter where you go to college.
2. Sometimes people are mean for no reason.
3. Being fat isn’t the worst thing in the world.
4. You will not stay good looking forever.
5. You may never find the man/woman of your dreams.
Alcohol or drugs does not make you more aware, quicker, and alert while driving.
Answer this question 
