Is there any point in all that stress and rush to buy and prepare things for Christmas?

I agree with you. I’d be happy just spending time with my family having a simple meal.

I think it’s pretty much for the sake of kids.

With my own gift buying, anybody I’m not seeing until after Christmas, I don’t stress about buying for by Christmas.

One of my coworkers spent Thanksgiving home alone, due to having her adult family in other places, and to me, it sounded pretty nice and relaxing. In my case, we have a close relative with a terminal illness, so we’re appreciating each and every holiday together for the time being.

I finished my shopping last week, did most of it online, finished wrapping last night, and we’re going to someone else’s house for the holiday dinner.

Who’s stressed and last minute??

I’ll try to look at it from an evolutionary/survival of the species perspective.
Could it be that it is a form of exercise and helps prepare us for disaster? The winter solstice has been happening for way longer than humans walked the earth. It is the longest night of the year and miserably cold. We are trapped indoors. The ancients who just sat in their caves during the long nights, got stiff and out of shape and were not able to hunt down prey as easily. The ones who got up during the darkest nights, collected firewood and food, stayed healthier and survived. They passed their genes down to future generations.
I know I certainly got a couple from a prepper living in a cave 1000 generations ago.

I also wonder if there is a mating success component – like bower birds, where the female mate with the male with the nicest nest. Did men begin to select for women who cooked fantastic meals, baked cakes and decorated cookies? Did .women begin to select for men who were able to decorate houses? Are Christmas decorations and Winter festivities like a Zahavi Handicap that signals greater biological fitness?

@cookieman You and I are Y chromosome holders. We don’t feel the hoiliday stress the same way as most double XX s. They suffer the most (self-imposed) stress thanks to the likes of Martha Stewart and HGTV.

Lucky I definitely agree with you (but didn’t want to say it for fear of people saying I’m generalizing) that women seem to be more into holiday stress than men. If you go to a fancy department store on Christmas eve, like Lord and Taylor, the jewelry counter is 3 deep with men just out of work, willing to spend a nice amount on the wife so they have something decent to hand her on Christmas day. The women, on the other hand, have been for the past few weeks running ragged with baking, wrapping, buying, running, stressing about buying what and for whom. Maybe the men have had the job of hanging lights on the outside of the house, Yes, this is generalizing but this is what I’ve observed in my decades of being alive, and for my family, too.

I also know there are a lot of birthdays in late summer (August, specifically). That shows us that when it’s cold and dark, people hole up in their cozy caves and get busy getting busy, and 9 months later, voila, look what the Gods have given us!

@jca Yesterday, 12/23, on the Diane Rehm Show, NPR there was a 1 hour segment on holiday stress and how women and men look at it differently. They looked at a huge data base from daily activity diaries. (I forget which university or organization did the study.)
The women are trying to get things done and the men are helping. The men go for a single act of generosity and figure they have done their part.
Women could fix this if they said “let’s not make cookies – we shouldn’t be eating all that fat and sugar anyway. Let’s just relax by the fire.” :-)

I have two Xs, but I am also lucky enough to be the youngest of seven children. I have never had any holiday at my home. It used to be my mom who always did and then my sisters took over. For some reason, they say they enjoy cooking tons of food and getting their houses ready for our large family. I don’t get it. I really don’t.
I enjoy shopping for gifts and wrapping them, but that’s about it really.

Very much a personal value judgment. For some people, it’s the culmination of the year and a time for family and such, which they can enjoy because they have time off.

For others, it’s a major pain in the ass.

For others, it’s just another day.

It depends on YOU .. what’s important to me may not be important to you.

No stress or rush here, all done & prepared for nowt but fun & great company…hoorah!

I agree absolutely with @elbanditoroso. It is strictly a personal choice what you make of it.

I grew up in a house where my mother was totally overcome and overwhelmed by the social obligation aspect of Christmas. She logged the Christmas cards, made sure her kids had “better” presents than the competition’s kids, and made little snide remarks about the lavish dinner provided by her parents-in-law.
I learned how not to do the holidays.

I bustle about, cook or manufacture most of the gifts I give out, and host an easy-to-prepare dinner for my kids and whatever waifs and strays stop in.

That’s the point for me. The prep is a joy, the holiday delightful.

@ZEPHYRA , I wish for you some joy during these cold dark days, and happiness in the new year.

I put a wreath on the door and decorated the dog (who wasn’t happy about it) and that was the extent of my holiday decorations. I go to my brother’s house for Christmas eve and I’m home alone on Christmas day with a nice book and I love it. No stress here.

@chyna “decorated the dog” – that’s funny. Poor dog.

Stress is good for the economy. It guarantees that people put themselves into debt to buy crap for people that they don’t need and will end up in a landfill. For most people, no matter how prepared you feel you are, there is always more. Made some cookies or painted a picture for that special loved one? Well, according to tv, people celebrate their love for the most important people in their lives by buying them a smartphone, television, or car. You’ve screwed up, Mr. Scrappy Gift. Go run to the mall. Bring your credit card.

I’ve heard people describe how they’re working so hard to make this a great xmas for their kids. Do you know what your kids would really love? For you to be less stressed, spend more quality time with them, and stop shopping.

(I saw a picture of the decorated dog, and she looked less-than-happy but willing to oblige.)

@chyna did you put a Santa hat on him? Love to see a photo of Christmas canine.

@ZEPHYRA See my avatar for Christmas canine.

There is a real benefit within families of whatever makeup and structure to make and keep traditions. It provides a sense of continuity and connection. And that sense of tradition is how older generations communicate a sense of family to younger generations.

As we mature, though, we learn that we can reshape our traditions to ease the stress of meeting outdated standards. As parents age and pass on, as siblings get separated, as marriages fall apart and morph into other arrangements, a mix of old and new traditions instill in us a sense of family.

Ever notice that the people who get most bent out of shape over a missed tradition are kids home from college or in their early twenties? They seek reassurance even though they have left the comfort of home, It is not until they are on their own completely that they begin new traditions and cast aside the old ones.

If you feel stressed out and overwhelmed at this time of year, perhaps you’d benefit from asking yourself why you do some of the things you do. And if a tradition is no longer useful, make a new one! Do anything two years in a row and it is a tradition!

The adults in our family stopped the gift giving thing a few years back, we have three small nieces and we buy for them.
Several family members choose to work on Christmas, like Mrs Squeeky she gets triple time for working the holiday,I like getting together and having a drink or a meal but as I get older the holiday just seems to mean less and less each year.
Maybe the stress or the all out commercialism just kicked me in the head once to often.

As for your question as to what is the point, for some I would say it’s expected of them and they like the stress, for others it’s put on them and they do it for the love of family and tradition.

Christmas really doesn’t have to be a major hassle unless we allow it to be. We made some changes in our family this year, adults do not exchange gifts and Christmas is for the little ones. This is the first December that I have actually enjoyed, for the first time, in a lot of years. Most of the Christmas baking was done ahead of time and frozen. The decision to not exchange gifts with the adults was a good one and everyone agrees. I am actually having fun this year and am enjoying time with those that I love.

No. After decades of high stress holidays, multiple events, massive gift giving stress and expenditure I have kept it really simple the last dozen years or so after divorcing my ex and the worlds most demanding family. lol
It has been nothing but fun for me these past years. Tonight we are doing a simple pizza party and salad bar thing, dessert, exchanging a couple gifts and watching movies.

Keep it simple I say. The best part is the gag gifts, I bought my daughters cat a battery operated Parakeet. hahaha

We did Christmas here once, and I enjoyed doing all the cooking by myself. The actual event was at our auction house which allowed the kids plenty of room to run around and play. I cooked all the meat and vegetables so everyone else [coming from 2–5 hours away] just needed a salad or desert.

I no longer give or receive Christmas presents as I’m not a kid, and don’t have young kids in my life.

I don’t enjoy it at all. I listened to my husband about a few gifts for his relatives and I completely regret it. I always do when this happens. The best thing for me is to spend a shitload of money or not go to Christmas at all.

@LuckyGuy is certainly on to something. Most of the Christmas traditions we still see in the western world began in Northern Europe. They pre-date Christianity, of course, as we all know and were linked to the Solstice and not quite the 24th. Not sure if any of you have ever lived this far north or can fathom the hardships people had to endure through lean times, but checking on your neighbours in the middle of winter and bringing what food and supplies you could spare to help see them through certainly was necessary. Before Jesus was invented and that myth spread, we had an understanding of our Universe and paid close attention to things like where the stars were in the sky and when and where on our horizon the sun set and rose. On the 21st of December, the Northern Hemisphere experiences its shortest period of daylight in the 24 hour period. We should all check on each other to make sure all is well and have enough put down for the next few, dark, cold months.

I’m not stressed. Even if I were, I’d think it worth it. I love Christmas!

I completely agree and I made a public declaration that I would no longer participate in the consumerist madness anymore 7 years ago. I’ve enjoyed the holiday season more than ever since then.