What is my gender?

Your avatar appears male, but I’d be surprised if that were actually you.

Male, but a few here have thought I was a woman.

100% unadulterated hetero male, and damn proud of it.

Mu.

Female
@SQUEEKY2 Good to know. With a name like squeeky2 I would’ve thought female too. Mostly because some people make a squeeking sound when they sneeze and it is usually a female who may sound like that. I for one sometimes squeek when I sneeze.
Boy, I hope this made sense. The benaydrl is kicking in and I don’t have my reading glasses in. Oh, well Good night all.

You appear to be Captain Picard, who is indeed male.

As for me, I am divorced. That makes me “me sexual”

I’m not gay, probably, and women disgust me so it’s just me and my hand and I’m fine with that.

You my dear must be female. I too belong to the “fairer” sex.

My sex is female. Beyond saying that I have a vagina, I don’t care much about my gender, so I don’t know?

Since, according to the WHO, “gender” is defined as ”... socially constructed roles, behaviours, activities, and attributes that a given society considers appropriate for men and women”, and I usually think society’s standards are fucking stupid, I don’t typically adhere.

Even growing up, before I could properly form opinions and before I could convey why, I used to get so mad when people would describe me as a tomboy. It’s not something that made sense to me, because I was female, not a boy, so why did I have to be compared to one?

I guess I’m neutral? I don’t believe there are inherent differences in men and women and I definitely don’t like perpetuating the belief that there are.

Gender is a human thought structure.

I am male but some on this site have thought otherwise . The confusion was entirely on their part.

Female, with only moderate penis envy.

My gender:

Female, biologically.

40% female and 60% male, socially.

Female, although you probably will never see me in a dress, unless it’s lingerie.

@zenzen – I don’t see why it matters.

If you say something brilliant, it makes no difference if you are male, female, or something in between.

Conversely, if you say something really stupid, it still makes no difference what your gender is.

This is what true gender equality is all about. You’re judged on your statements and thoughts, not on what biological accoutrements you happen to have attached.

Oh, and if you want to know, my gender has been confused so much on this site that my profile has a little joke about it. The confusion doesn’t bother me, I’m just curious as to why people think it at first.

I hadn’t given your gender a lot of thought. Picard is male, but seems pleasantly adulterated.

I enjoy your participation and leave it at that? It’s one of the beauties of the internet…there’s no baggage of race or gender or nationality unless you want to drag your baggage everywhere with you.

I know you’re a man – who you screw or how you dress is of no interest to me.

I don’t even use the newer definition of the word gender, I still use its roots. Gender and sex are the same to me, as are ‘gender roles’ and ‘sex roles’. Gender and sex refer to a state of facts surrounding one’s biological reproductive traits (at birth), and the latter are referring to roles attributed to those genders (be they valid or not).

Given my understanding and use of the terms, I do not know what gender/sex you are.
I am male.
If you’re subtly prodding for discussion about genders/sexes and/or gender/sex roles, then I recognize there are definite differences in anatomy, chemistry, and behavior between the two sexes. And I have no problem acknowledging such.

I have to admit to a certain naivete on the whole subject of gender. It seems that a lot of people here have given the matter more thought than I have, so I’m quite open to correction. But it seems to come down to this: sex is objective and gender is subjective. In other words, what we call sex can be determined by someone else, based on objective criteria; but gender is a determination that someone can only make about themselves, based on self-image.

If that’s a correct understanding, than it’s nonsensical to ask anyone else what gender you are, since only you can answer.

I don’t care what your gender is. In general, I think it’s silly when people make a big deal about revealing or not revealing their own gender.

I’m sick of playing online games and someone says a general remark to a group like “You guys go around the corner and look for bad guys” and some miffy girl has to point out that she’s NOT a guy. “Guys” in that moment just meant “You as a group of people”

But I also think it’s silly when someone makes a deal out of being secretive about their gender. Either tell or don’t. Meh.. who cares?

It only kind of matters when you’re going to meet someone IRL and you get that surprise. After assuming someone was male all these years you find out they are not. It’s a good story to tell. But other than that—who cares?

I’m female btw. I think everyone knows that.

@zenzen You are a hotmail.

My avatar is a squeaky, hyperactive, tiny male mouse… so some jellies have assumed I was just that. My avatar is there as a result of a response I gave back in 2012—“What cartoon character best fits you.” I would’ve liked to be able to say “Jessica Rabbit,” but I’d be lying.

Some days, I feel more like Mad, Mad, Madame Mim

If a movie was made about my life, I’d ask Emma Stone or Ellen Page to perform me as a teenager.

@keobooks – here’s the thing. I would never meet someone that I know from Fluther in person. Ever.

Fluther is virtual. Life is real.

@elbanditoroso I’ve met several Jellies IRL and enjoy doing it very much. (To clarify, I mean I enjoy meeting them, not “doing it.”

@janbb lol
I don’t hink I will get the opportunity in the near future to meet with others on the site, but I would love to, if for no other reason to share full complete understandings that can be covered in conversation where written text just can’t get it. I hope to meet anyone on here sometime… that would be javin!

I don’t know, what is your gender? That’s up to you.

I’m lucky enough to have no qualms about the female body I was born in.

IDK but you’re gay.

@elbanditoroso—You DO understand that the people on this site are not virtual. They are flesh and blood real people who you meet via the internet. They are not virtual people.

I’ve been on other sites that had regular meetups all over the world. I went to many of them and met posters from all over the place. It was quite fun.

It tickles me to no end when I have the opportunity to talk to a Jelly. I have several Jellies phone numbers.

Put ya dick in a blender & find out.

Just wanted to say.. I was kinda disappointed when someone on this site mentioned that they were going to a certain event and I mentioned that I was going there too and it might be cool to meet up. They acted kind of creeped out. Maybe it was because I was new to the site or something. This was 2008 or 2009 that it happened and I asked via PM once they posted about going there. ., but if just about ANYONE—even people I “dislike” here asked me to meet up with them because they were in town or going to an event I was going to, I’d DO IT.

It’s SO fun meeting people and finding out what they are really like. Once there was a guy on a site that I completely loathed. We found out that we’d been going to the same gaming convention for years and even though we disliked each other, we decided to meet up. We had a blast. I found out that most of what I hated about his posts was part of his extremely dry and sarcastic sense of humor that did NOT translate well into print but was totally funny IRL.

Anyway.. I guess this doesn’t count because I always knew he was a guy. But I have surprised people in the past. People used to always assume I was male until they met me or heard my voice.

I have 2 X chromosomes and a working vagina and female reproductive organs.

I rarely wear make-up and I dress like a little boy. I can’t cook and I hate manual labor. I have long hair and love jewelry. What’s my gender? That’s up to you to infer.

I’m a man.

I’m an independent. Or a libertarian. I can’t keep them straight. I didn’t register for either party.

I am a male and a man, but not a mailman.

Male
I have, based on genetic testing, an X and a Y chromosome. Thus I am Heterogametic, which is the chromosomal definition of what the scientific community calls “Male”
Now, all sorts of people think the scientific community is some sort of conspiracy to either maintain an oppressive status quo, or unleash the dogs of revolutionary war.
I think it is simply an information resource.
By that standard, I am male.
Feel pretty good about that too.

I’m female and you’re male. There is only one jelly I am not sure about their gender and I would be interested to know. There might be some jellies I think are one gender and are actually another, but only one I wonder about. I think gender does make a difference in life experience and how people answer questions.

Ok serious answer.

I’m a man. A woman’s man. IF you ever saw me you could tell by the way I walk. Unfortunately I don’t have much spare time for conversation. I like music at a high volume and women with a healthy body temperature.

I don’t understand why jellies are putting what gender they are attracted to in their answers.

@JLeslie Because it’s very important for us to know that these guys are big, strong, straight dudes that chug beer, pump iron, and score mad kitty. And don’t you ever think any different, little lady. I am Man, hear me roar!

Great thread guys. I wont single anyone out, however, I would like to respond and comment to what I’ve read here, and elsewhere.

I am rarely serious, although, fun is an exact science. Notwithstanding, jellies have read into, or perhaps projected a mite, into this question.

Thanks Lingua, and yes, you and Jleslie and a few others have seen my pics or video clips performing. I am male and unrelated to Mr. Picard ~

Lingua i owe you a photo of the tee shirt logo you designed, and one day an actual tee. Pm me pls.

In summary, I was reading about Bruce Jenner and this question popped into my head. Just when I thought I was fresh out. And Fluther said it’s good to go… Great thread jellies, regardless of what and how you wrote… There are no correct answers; there are only questions.

Bruce Jenner is going to be a hideous woman. I fully support his (and anyone else’s) transition, but dude is going to be one scary looking chick.

@JLeslie I would think that those who put their desires in their answers consider those desires either effects or causes of what gender they consider themselves to be. So, they are offering what appears to them as the same information others are putting… their gender.

I find two things interesting in this thread: 1— those that answer the question with their sex (i.e. those that respond to a gender question with their sex when so many consider them two different things), and 2— those others that subscribe and answer based on gender being a choice, but all their answers seem to match… ‘you’re gender is whatever you choose’.

Going with the ‘gender is a choice’ concept, I can see why people are trying to do away with it. If I can choose to be whatever I want, whenever I want, then what I choose at any given time (long term or short) is meaningless. But doesn’t that just negate the concept of gender? Why choose one at all? And if not choosing one, then gender becomes a mute issue. In which, case aren’t we right back to the concept of sex?

@Sinqer I don’t really have a problem still using the concept of gender, although I do see how it is problematic for some people, and I would want all people to feel comfortable, even if they don’t specifically identify male or female, and all the many combinations possible. Maybe it needs to be male, female and other.

The terms sex and gender are often used interchangeably and sex used for gender does not have to mean anything to do with “sex,” but it can.

I think in a lot of ways gender is like religion, race, and other identifiers we use. I’m a woman, Jewish, not religious, and married. Some people might not list their gender as a meaningful identifier for themselves.

I think @livelaughlove21 is probably right. Men associate being a macho man with being attracted to women, so they are compelled to list they are attracted to women to further define themselves as male. I don’t really see the two things as related. Gay men are men. Lesbian women are women.

@Sinqer

Sex is physical – genitals/chromosomes
Gender is mental. For example, most of the people in this thread feel their gender matches their sex. But for a MtF transperson, despite their male sex their gender is female.

To this end, it’s not so much that gender is chosen like you imply. Did most of us choose to have our genders match our sexes? No, it wasn’t conscious. Same way for people whose genders don’t match their sex.

And then there are also people who don’t feel “right” in the gender binary. They don’t really feel male, they don’t really feel female. They might choose to label themselves as genderqueer or agender or some other word. But the choice is just the label they’re assigning to it – they didn’t choose to feel agender.

Does that make more sense?

@Mariah GA

Agreed. GA @Mariah

I think what @Mariah wrote makes sense, but it doesn’t change that the words sex and gender are often used as synononyms.

Plus, if a oerson born with male sex organs, and maybe even raised as a boy, decised to live as a woman and wants to be called a woman, but never goes through the sex change surgery, they still would not want to say their sex is a male I don’t think. They might have boy parts, so to speak, but they identify as women, and I don’t think they want to be much reminded their “sex” is male. I would say their sex is female.

@Mariah To paraphrase your concept (and please correct if this is not it): sex refers to the genetic disposition of the anatomy. And gender is an unchosen mental disposition.

If this is so, then why does gender relate to sex (i.e. why are genders masculine and feminine)?
Why aren’t the genders more like: antagonist, bookworm, mad-video-gamer, etc.?

I only ask, because the mere fact that the genders are rooted in the sexes (even in the root of the word ‘gender’) offers, what seems to me, only two available options, male and female. But I can’t see how people are arguing away these genders (i.e. gender roles are false misconceptions), but at the same time acknowledge their gender as male or female, and even speak/chat about it in those words.

I guess what I’m wondering is: Is there a male gender? Is there a female gender? Are there other genders besides?

Lastly, I didn’t imply gender is chosen. I offered thoughts/considerations of relations within a perspective in which genders are chosen, because I have heard and read others speaking and writing such ideas. I explained my applied concept of ‘gender’ earlier in the thread, and it has nothing to do with choice. I use sex and gender to mean the same thing.

I don’t apply the gender-roles, or gender as it seems most here do, hence my questions trying to understand it. I can’t grasp the idea of the male sex of/with a female gender without applying some form of standards that define what a female gender is as opposed to male; and if such definition is applied, then the gender roles have been substantiated then and there. If not, how so?

Let me add a disclaimer now that I am speaking from the outside since I am personally pretty gender normative. This is something I’ve read a bit about though.

Yes, there is a male and female gender. The movement nowadays though is to stop thinking of gender in the binary and more like a spectrum. There are people who feel they are neither male nor female, or both equally, or more feminine than masculine but not fully female.

It is of course tied to sex. The concept of gender exists, however, for people who do not feel right as their physical sex to explain how they do feel. Because people obviously make assumptions based on appearances. We have other words to describe properties like “bookworm.”

@JLeslie I’ve found that most pre-op transpeople will freely identify their sex as matching their current physical body. That is the entire purpose of the current distinction between “sex” and “gender.” Still having the concept of sex is useful, for example, at doctor visits in which they still have to concern themselves with sex-specific risks (i.e. a MtF transperson who still has to get checked for testicular cancer, will tell a doctor that her sex is male).

@Mariah Gender is mental.
That somewhat nullifies you later statement “No, it wasn’t conscious”. If it is not consciously made it would appear more psychological to me. I guess animals are by default, genderless. A tom cat doesn’t see a queen in heat and think, no I am not going to jump her bones because I am soooooo much like her, I want to jump the bones of that tom cat trying to get her. The mama cat goes into heat, they hear the caterwauling, they spring into action to mount that queen before the other toms. If it is not conscious the claim that animals actively are gay is ludicrous.

OK, I meant mental as in psychological (versus physiological). I was not aware of a difference between the words “mental” and “psychological” in this context.

Very interesting report about someone who switches gender on a regular basis.

@thorninmud Interesting article, but it would seem to support the fact that there are indeed two recognizable genders, male and female, and that they are distinguishable.

The only part I found myself opposed to was the description of living or existing between genders. Never once was (s)he between, always one or the other.

Just because that person wasn’t agender doesn’t mean that nobody is, though.

One of my favorite webcomics is drawn by an agender person, you could check out their work for some explanation of their feelings about gender: http://chaoslife.findchaos.com/agender-agenda

@Mariah

She indicates that she doesn’t like it when others don’t ‘respect’ her lack of gender, but she doesn’t seem very concerned about ‘respecting’ their application of gender to her. Does she think no one else should categorize her behaviors as feminine or masculine, or some mix thereof? Or perhaps no one should make educated guesses or assumptions based on her sex? Some of the bubbles at the bottom referred to her sex, and perhaps gender considerations attached… should no one be allowed the freedom to make such guesses or assumptions?

And lastly, the most puzzling part to me, why accept the concept of gender (with masculine and feminine as at least two of the possibilities) to turn around and create a word that says you have a gender that is not a gender? It sounds like she is offering one of two understandings (actually it sounds like she is mixing them, because she doesn’t really understand what she means that well):

1 – there are two genders (male/female); I have no gender (implied by her definition… agender means without gender). This one makes me wonder on what basis she even supports the existence of the unchosen mental dispositions (genders).

2 – there are at least three genders (male/female/agender); I am agender, which amounts to nothing more than I am not one of the other two. This one is the creation of a term which has no meaning save to point out what the subject is not, in which case, why not just skip the neologism and simply say you don’t have a gender?

Sorry I forgot to reply earlier. I am really not an authority on this subject and I’m not sure if I can clarify this topic any further for you. You might enjoy this discussion currently occurring on reddit though.