How do I react to this?
Yesterday I was at my cousin’s house and we were cooking and at some point, her mom looks at me and says: ” Oh my god, you have this huge thing(pimple) on your face” then I stay quiet, then she says ” Do you see it, oh my god it’s so big it’s right there, why is it there?” then I stay quiet, I say I don’t know and she kept talking about it in her shocking expression.
Her daughter told her to stop then she said : ” Well it’s right there, yall can be lying to yourself but I wont be lying to myself it’s there.” So i just sat at the table then I couldn’t and went in the bathroom to cry a bit and came back.
How do you answer that question ? How do you react ? I felt the rush of anxiety rushing threw me. I don’t know why it’s there, it came by it self I didn’t invite it. It’s like being ugly. I didn’t choose to be I just am…
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19 Answers
See – this is a part of why you need to stay further away from these people. No wonder you feel badly about yourself. You have to find a way to say “it’s none of your fucking business” politely. You might try practicing saying something like, “Do you know how rude you sound? Of course I’m aware of it.”
The moral is don’t be around people who are damaging to your self-esteem.
Sometimes people don’t think and ask the stupidest questions. It’s like seeing someone with a whole in their shoes and asking why do you have a whole in your shoe. Do you think if the person had the chance or budget to have brand new shoes they’d be wearing the one with the hole in it?? _”
Way to go @janbb !!
“Do you know how rude you sound? Of course I’m aware of it.”
Clear, concise and to the point without being vicious, obnoxious or verbally abusive!
I like it.
You should’ve said something like this…
“My pimple is temporary, your terrible personality seems to be permanent”
I don’t have the words for what I would say. I have never encountered (in my adult life) someone who was so humiliating. As a child, yes, and I find her behavior child-like. I would probably say something like “ok, do you have to keep harping on it?”
haha xD she would of smack me ! @ucme
@jca It makes me realize how age is not really a sign of maturity ! Also, I see how staying quiet is also not working because they continue on the subject ! I think janbb’s answer is one I should kick myself and have the courage to answer when someone is being “mean”.
Stand up, call a cab and leave. Do not return.
Be nice to the cab driver though, they can be mean, miserable bastards too :D
Most children have better manners by the age of five – and you say she’s a mother!
You know @Inconito101, just because some people are older doesn’t mean they’re smarter. Some people are idiotic and rude. I’d put your aunt? (cousin’s mum) in this category. She’s obviously an insensitive idiot. So you may have a zit on your face, and that’s no fun, but she’s a moron. Your zit will heal. She will always be a moron. Try to keep that in mind when someone behaves this way.
Sending you a big hug because despite what I’ve just said, it still feels horrible when someone behaves that way.
Pimple are temporary you no need to worry or think so much about it. You can just say its a pimple which will go in few days why are you reacting so much.
Oh wow that is EXTREMELY rude!! I would never say anything like that to someone and neither should she. If ever she does it again, just say yes, its there I know, shrug it off and pretend not to care, if she keeps on going with it ask her if she wants a closer look and get in her face, or ask her if she wants to touch it. She will very quickly shut up about it. But your pimple will go away eventually, just don’t ever let her see the effect of what she says to you bothers you, pretend it doesn’t and cry about it later. Don’t give her the satisfaction.
haha Yes! thank you giving you a big hug too :)
I notice age is not a sign of maturity long time ago!! Hopefully the world gets better for future generations ! If people could look without any MENTAL OR ORAL labeling would be great ! mehh! :/
@BBonds great advise, I will never show my emotion again you are right, it always better to keep them to yourself in these kinds of situation. What made me feel even more anxious is that her daughter was going on about it to her mom. Telling her how she cant say stuff like that, she rude, and that she feels insecure about herself which is why she said that to me. [This is when I got out of the kitchen and went in the bathroom] I really appreciate her for defending me but i think she should of just let it go since it’s her mother at the end of the day.
You know what @Inconito101 it might be that her mom does that to her as well, and possibly in front of people like her friends or the guy she likes/boyfriend. She probably just felt at that point in time she needed to defend you as it’s one thing for her mom to do it to her, but another to do it to other people as well. Maybe she made a bigger deal than she should have, but take it as her wanting to stand up for you and also stand up against her mom, which was quite brave. But yes, next time, should it ever happen again, just stand strong.
Yes maybe! Thank you for your advice :) <3 @bbonds
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