What has happened to you that you always feared, avoided, or judged?

I have a neighbor who constantly bashes about how often people boast and how good her son is at the same time. An example is: “I can’t understand why people are so proud of their children’s achievement at school and boast around. Look at my son. He only gets the gold medal for the city’s sport competition and the first prize for the city’s math competition, yet I have never boasted”

My fear of being avoided or judged.

Nowt

“Did you hear about Joe.getting lung cancer” “No surprise. The guy smoked like a chimney”
“Did you hear about her skin cancer?” “No surprise. She spent all day sunning herself.”
“Did you hear about big Pauly’s cancer?” “No surprise. He’s so obese he makes a whale look thin.”
“Did you hear about John getting prostate cancer?” “No surprise. The guy never had a physical.”

And then I got my diagnosis.
Sh*t.

@LuckyGuy Like my BIL who won’t use a microwave for health reasons, always talked about healthy foods. He got the colon cancer at age 46. Sucks.

My ex used to make fun of bald people. My brother ran into him recently and he is now mostly bald.

My mom was so insecure and needy that it eventually brought on the thing she feared most….after 24 years Dad filed for divorce because he couldn’t take the drama any more.

When I was younger I was a judgmental shithead, and I thought people who put their own happiness as a high priority were selfish, and I thought I was so much better, and that I was going to spend my life improving mankind rather than worrying about something as pointless and ephemeral as my own personal happiness.

Guess what my priorities are nowadays…

Children are so quick to criticize adults, I think, they still so idealistic and they don’t understand how life wears you down and makes you into something you never intended to be.

I used to criticize and judge my older cousin who had Bipolar Disorder (not to his face).
Guess what I have now.

Well, for posterities sake, I’ve always feared dementia of some sort. We’ll see in a few years. The concussions may catch up with me. :(

That most homeless people are drug addicts, mentally ill and/or alcoholics. Now I have teetered on the edge of homelessness after being solvent and independent for decades after being cut off at the knees by the sword of the recession ( depression ) the last few years.
I still struggle with my self image ( ego ) of why I am not like all those other homeless people.
Also judging suicidal people, I never thought I’d ever consider suicide, certainly not over any relationship, but homelessness, yep, I would gas myself before I lived on the streets, still might at some point. lol

I was homeless for about three weeks. I slept in my car and would go take showers at a community center for five bucks. When it got really cold I would wake up to turn the car on and let it warm up. I have a job but when I first moved to the area I had a lot of debt.

Edit: and I was amazed at how comfortable the back seat of a Honda Accord could be. Very spacious car.

I can think of three occasions when I was specifically judgemental and lo and behold I am now in the same position as those people. In the last 12 months I have consciously changed what I am prepared to say, I never make positive remarks when things are going well in my life, I never say never and no longer do I comment about aspects of other people I find distasteful. I prefer not to tempt fate these days.

That I would marry an insecure moron, discover it too late, and have to go through the hassle and expense of a divorce. Oh well.

@Coloma Just curious. What was so “lol” about your comment? Sounded pretty grim to me.

@janbb Just my sardonic humor. ” I still might”...being someone who likes to keep their options open.
I see nothing grim about taking ones fate into their own hands if the lemons cannot be reconstituted into lemonade.