What Is something you would not want to find In your bed ?

Laughs, a bat?

A bed bug.

A bat! @Adirondackwannabe had us all traumatized with that one!

At least I can still laugh about it.

@Adirondackwannabe haha…i wouldn’t either.

Bed bugs, ticks, spiders (black widows, brown recluse), turds, somebody else’s pubic hair.

A priest.

@talljasperman Eww creepy crawlies Big no no.

Snake, insect, snail anything like that and dog poop!!!!!!!!

A horse’s head.

Another guy would be a bummer.

I was 13 when I saw that @Pied_Pfeffer. Talk about traumatized!

Any type of insect or anything uninvited, (man or beast).

Lady Gaga…

A stranger.

How about I list the only things I want in my bed; pillows, blankets, kitties and Johnny
Depp.

Grandma, naked, legs akimbo, pleasuring herself with a rubber fist.

Milo here; Gail.

@ucme
Thanks, now I am aroused.

@ragingloli Pump up the volume…dance, dance.
http://youtu.be/g5TVKhjEVtQ

@ucme – is that you in the third row with the large eyeglasses and big teeth?

Bugs of any kind.

@elbanditoroso No, that’s me at the front on lead vocals.

@Pied_Pfeffer reminds me of that Mafia film.

That’s what she was referring too, The Godfather.

Jody Arias. Or John Bobbitt’s ex wife.

@Adirondackwannabe Lol, Lorina Bobbitt. I remember when I was in school and that event happened, after that all the boys in my class were using the name “bobbitt” as a word for chopping off dicks. It was even verbalized; he was bobbitted! Or I’ll bobbitt him or again, he suffered bobbitting.

“Take out a knife & slash that cock off, bibbity Bobbitty boo”
You shall go to the balls Cinderella :D

Damn man, that was…pretty good lol.

Hey, good or bad, this shit just flows :D

I would not wanna find Goldilocks in my bed, coz that would mean she ate my porridge & broke my kids chair, bloody cheek.

A female ISIL terrorist or my ex-wife.

Actually, there’s not much difference.

A dead body

“I don’t know of anything worse after an all night binge than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember her name, how she got there, and why she’s dead. That’s when I say “I’m never doing this again!” Followed by “And this time I mean it!”~ AstroChuck.

Cthulhu.

A cockroach.

A spider. I just can’t deal with those buggers. Heh. BUGgers. lol

Wimp.

Cookie, cracker, or bread crumbs. Or burrs, brambles, stick-tights.
Anything uninvited that moves independent of me.
Marbles. Discomfort and noise.
A used condom.
Ice. Wet.
Waxed paper, TRY it. or sheets of paper of any kind.

Sorry, I just realized I answered the question:
“What would you hate to wake up and find in your bed?”
As in, groggy and unsuspecting.

Hope you don’t mind, as I Asked it.

A clown.

A cane toad, an insect of any type, a snake, my ex-husband.

My severed limbs.

Sorry to offer a serious answer to a silly q, but… a smothered or crushed infant. How the hell do people co-sleep with their babies without getting freaked out at this thought? Gives me the willies and I’ve never even had kids.

ETA: Just read this article, which explains it a bit for me. Nothing against parents who do or did this; I get that there are a lot of benefits. Still gives me the willies, though.

@wildpotato After having kids, you develop this bizarre radar that’s always on alert even when you’re asleep. Handy for not smothering your kid. But that also means you’re probably not getting your full rest. Might explain why I wake up bleary-eyed and my husband wakes up totally refreshed. :P

SIDS scares me more than the possibility of smothering my kid. :(

A cockroach.
When I moved into my apartment, I discovered it was infested with cockroaches. I called my sister to try not to freak out, and her only advice to me was “Don’t sleep with your mouth open”.

@wildpotato: My daughter slept in my bed from around 5 days old onward. I made sure she was a distance away and it worked out.

@Dutchess_III They need to find their OWN beds, that’s all. The little eight-legged freeloaders.