Apparently, gender reveal parties are the new thing. Thoughts?

Sounds like a more complex version of I will show you mine if you will show me yours. Edit as long as the fetus isn’t aborted , or mistreated put up for adoption, because of gender then it’s ok.

I had to google since I thought it was joke. But yeah, somehow this is a thing. The stupidest thing ever but a thing.

Ladies.. Spreading your legs isn’t hard. The baby shower is enough of a reward.. Don’t even get me started on the scam known as wedding rings. Your snowflake isn’t special.

I don’t have much of an opinion about it. I probably wouldn’t do it, but I don’t get why it’s cringe-worthy or the “stupidest thing ever.” Who cares how a couple finds out or reveals the sex of their baby?

Explain, please, because I’m clearly missing something.

It seems a bit over the top to me. Seems like everything has to be such a production anymore.

I hate parties but there’s free food, right? I’ll go.

I’ve never come across this but I can’t see the harm in it. If people want an excuse to get together and celebrate with friends, good on them.

Ah, a request for an opinion, so here it is.

A ‘gender reveal’ party sounds like, on the surface, another reason to spotlight the mother-to-be. Obviously, the child won’t remember it. If the child was conceived in the traditional sense, it is highly doubtful that the sperm donor will appreciate the celebration. If it is regarding a child of anyone belonging to the LGBT community, then there is little to no chance of them participating in a ‘gender reveal’ party.

So who does that leave?

Ugh.

Naked twister does it for me.

@Pied_Pfeffer ” If the child was conceived in the traditional sense, it is highly doubtful that the sperm donor will appreciate the celebration. If it is regarding a child of anyone belonging to the LGBT community, then there is little to no chance of them participating in a ‘gender reveal’ party.”

How do you figure that?

Shrug. Another reason to have a party? Why not. Must we be stoic 24/7?

WTH? I had no idea what this was. My mind went to games like 7 minutes in the closet.

So, it’s like a baby shower is that it? Ugh.

“Gender reveal parties”:

Copy, paste, and add your link immediately after, no space. Should look like this in the “Live Preview” box.

Welcome! Stick around.
If I’d been sooner to the question, I would have searched and linked for you.

I might ask @nutallergy to be my deaf date…we’ll exchange photos, but never have chatted on the phone.

I think it’s dumb, but it’s a harmless party. If I was asked to attend one I would suddenly be asked to work that night.

I agree with @livelaughlove21 and @Earthbound_Misfit. I don’t see why people are saying it’s cringe-worthy or the stupidest thing ever (a la @livelaughlove21) and if it’s an excuse to get friends and family together, it’s a good thing (a la @Earthbound_Misfit).

If people enjoy it, it’s a party and everyone has fun, who am I to say that’s a bad thing?

@livelaughlove21 How do you figure that? Based upon experience. Of all of the baby showers (a common practice) I’ve attended, it is rare to see the father there. Add another, and non-traditional, party to the equation, and it becomes even more doubtful that a man would show up.

If you mean why doubt whether people in the LGBT community would throw a ‘gender reveal’ party, does it really mean spelling out?

@jca It’s not a bad thing if the people invited and attend enjoy the event. It just seems like yet one more extravagant excuse to spotlight a woman carrying a child.

@Pied_Pfeffer: I understand. I am not a big fan of formal parties, depending on who the party is for, venue, etc. My attitude toward all of them is if I am not into it, I find an excuse not to go and I don’t go.

@jca Me, too. Still, it leaves a feeling of guilt for not attending, and probably worse, that something is wrong with me for desiring not to participate in what others consider a highlight in their life. It’s a baby. I wish them all health and happiness, no matter what their gender turns out to be.

@Pied_Pfeffer Based on your limited personal experience. Got it.

I’ve never been a part of a gender reveal party, but the ones I’m seeing online do include the dad, so I guess your prediction doesn’t always hold. And I don’t see why a gay couple having a baby would inherently be against such a party just because they’re gay. I suppose you do need to spell that out for me.

Methinks people are being a bit judgmental and uptight about this. Seriously, who cares if the excited couple wants to share this moment with friends and family? No one is forcing anyone to throw one, or even attend one. It seems odd that people are so against it with no good reason.

Like I said, I wouldn’t do it. I don’t even want a baby shower. My bridal shower was enough to make me never want to have a party like that again. However, I see no harm in people (who have decent people in their lives that aren’t selfish assholes, unlike me) doing it.

@Pied_Pfeffer: To me, with any party, my choices if I am not wanting to attend are either a) have a great excuse that is fool proof (going to another party, etc.) or b) go to the party and stay briefly. There’s always the option of sending a nice gift in the near future with a lovely card. I don’t feel guilty if I don’t go, as my life is busy and I am not always available.

From what I’ve seen, gender reveal parties include both parents.

Is it a gift giving party?

@JLeslie: That’s a good question. I just googled it and found this forum topic from 2011 (a few years old as far as the internet goes but still good commentary):

http://community.babycenter.com/post/a26558593/do_i_bring_a_gift_to_a_gender_reveal_party?cpg=1

Some say it’s just a small party for close family and friends, some say bring a small gift, some say they wouldn’t bring any gift. I’ve never been to one so I have no idea what people really bring, if anything, but I usually feel inclined to bring some kind of gift to a party, even if something small. I’ve never been to one so I have no idea what kinds of things people give. There are also people on that forum who say it seems like overkill, like an excuse to receive gifts.

I’d never heard of this. We have parties after the baby is born, usually called a ‘Christening’ or a ‘Naming ceremony’ and taking a gift for that is normal. I didn’t , but some people do. When I found out I was pregnant, I kept it quiet (except for telling my husband) until the first trimester was over. I never had a baby shower (I didn’t know anyone here to have such a thing anyway) and I didn’t ‘Christen’ my baby for obvious reasons. In fact…. there was no one but me at his first birthday, come to think of it. After my 19th week when we have our ultrasound, some parents want to know the sex of the baby. The tech asked us and we said, ‘sure’... and she pointed out that the sex was obvious. In her Swedish dialect, she said, ‘There is his pung (his ballsack) and there is his penis.’ It sounded really funny in Swedish… I guess you had to be there. I didn’t tell anyone. It made me terrified because I knew it had just doubled my chances of having an autistic child.

“Gender reveal party” sounds like something that should happen at a strip-club. “And we have, yet another female, gender 100% confirmed!”

I too don’t see why the father or a gay couple would not participate in something like this. Fathers of all stripes are more and more involved in all facets of childrearing and this kind of new ritual, like “bark mitzvahs” seems right up yuppy ally.

My knee-jerk reaction is that it feels like another narcissistic ritual of this “I’m the first person ever doing this” age but chacun a son gout. If you are expected to bring a gift to it and to the baby shower and when the baby is born, then I would find it objectionable.

@cazzie I think you touched on one reason the idea makes me uncomfortable. It’s too early. If the party is when most couples find out the sex of the baby, the fetus is only 4 or 5 months if I remember correctly? Baby showers are typically the 7th month or later when statically everything is likely to be going ok with the pregnancy and the baby is viable with little to no intervention.

I guess maybe since I had so many pregnancies end in miscarriage and ectopics I would err on the side of not “jinxing” anything and go more with the traditions of not setting up everything and not celebrating too far before the event of the birth. I like the idea of the party shortly after the birth for a naming or similar.

My sister had one of these. It was the first I’d heard of them and it seemed like harmless fun. I think it was actually the father that suggested it.

I’ve never heard of this before but it does make me cringe. I didn’t want to know the sex of my children before they were born.

Okay, okay! I stand corrected.

This question was posted on Facebook yesterday, and the responses were similar to the ones on this thread. Two said that they were fun. One said that the husband attended, which makes sense as he was finding out the sex of their child. One said that they must be for the first-born. And one called me up to say that it is border-line narcissistic. A relative, who happens to be a lesbian, said that she would attend one. Out of all that people who “liked” the post, only one was male.

So let me retract my initial response and replace it with this: I typically do not enjoy big social events, so unless it is for someone I care deeply about, I would not desire to attend it.

I do not think that people have both a baby shower and a gender reveal party (at least for the same attendees). My friends, at least, have had a gender reveal party and no shower. It, actually, was probably to their detriment since they actually needed baby supplies and people didn’t know whether to bring a gift to the party.

I thought about having one… just as an excuse to celebrate the pregnancy and surprise everyone with the baby’s sex at the same time. But, ultimately, it seemed like a lot of focus on something that was not important to me (i.e. the baby’s biological sex). And we decided to not find out the sex in advance… so that would have made a gender reveal party difficult…

@Cupcake That would have been a “surprise gender reveal party”!

@janbb I guess my husband and I had a gender reveal party in the delivery room… but no cake with hidden blue frosting…