It’s obviously something unresolved in your life. 3 years is a long time to be having the same nightmare. I’m sorry that you feel you can’t lean on your friends anymore for support.
Have you tried to look inside yourself for the reasons why this doesn’t go away after so long? Are you avoiding confronting something that the accident brought forward in your life? The fear or reality of mortality for example? Are you under a lot of stress in your life currently? Has the accident become a symbol of some sort of insecurity that you have?
I found some relevant info and though I hesitate to offer it, since I’m not a big Dr. Phil fan, I think it’s not such bad advice.
“How to Stop Recurring Nightmares
If you have a recurring nightmare or night terror that is causing you anxiety, Dr. Phil has some advice:
Dreams of any kind usually reflect unfinished business from your life or from just that day. Thoughts and fears that you may suppress while you’re awake reside in your subconscious and can manifest when you’re in a dream state. For example, nightmares may evolve from feelings of inadequacy or of not being worthy.
Nightmares that repeat a traumatic event reflect a normal psychic healing process, and should diminish in frequency and intensity if recovery is progressing.
If you have unfinished emotional business while you’re asleep, you can finish it while you’re awake. Set up a ritual before you go to bed. Things that you can do:
1) Talk about the nightmare with someone. Give it a voice. Describe it fully, scene by scene, what happened and how you felt.
2) Write it out. Write out the whole scenario, including what happens when you wake up, if you sleepwalk, etc.
3) Act it out. Play all the characters involved.
4) Imagine a more pleasant ending. It sounds simple, but getting every neurological loop involved can help finish the business.
If those rituals don’t lessen the nightmares, take a closer look at your internal dialogue. What you tell yourself can have a dramatic influence on your subconscious.
The Association for the Study of Dreams offers additional information:
About five to 10 percent of adults have nightmares once a month or more frequently.
Many people experience nightmares after a traumatic event such as surgery, loss or an accident.
Others experience nightmares when they are undergoing stress in their waking lives, such as a change on the job, pregnancy, moving, financial concerns, etc..”
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/206
I do have recurring nightmares but they aren’t so serious. I can sort of laugh at them usually. I spend a lot of time commuting so my dreams often involve trains and boats and not getting to work on time or not being able to get home, being stranded with no idea how to get home.
I am not sure how you are supposed to imagine a more pleasant ending. I mean, it was an accident and it was traumatic for you. I would acknowledge that to yourself. But maybe fiction, an imagined good ending will help you cope? It’s worth a try. They say the brain cannot distinguish from a real and an imagined event. So in the interests of healing it might be worth a try.