If you're on facebook, how do you handle comments that are just too ignorant to ignore?

I try to ignore. Sometimes, I delete my previous answers on the Q. Sometimes I answer back and delete several hours after the fact. Once in a while I go full force with my answer, sometimes linking things, and go back and forth with answers if there is a reply to mine. If I could make my answers private from my friends I would answer back more than I do, but the privacy is controlled by the person who originally wrote the status. One of the many things that annoys me about facebook.

I try try to tell myself that I can pretend I never saw that ignorant statement, I don’t have to comment on it.

I have tried to respond with reason and intelligence in the past, now I move on. I’m fuming and my blood pressure goes up, but responding does nothing. No, wait, let me amend that. If it is a real friend, I do that. And take a second look at the friendship. If it is a FB friend only, I either ignore or unfriend depending on how egregious the remarks are. If it’s someone else’s friend I might comment that they are a dope, or something else not heated that discredits their opinion by indicating that it is childish and unworthy of heat or notice, really (I’m pretty spiteful on occasion) then I unfollow the thread.
Then I take the dogs out and work out the anger/annoyance by playing them hard.

@Judi: “Today the racial slurs about our president couldn’t go unanswered.”

If you were to answer the racial slurs, what is it that you feel would be improved?

If your friend had made a factually-incorrect statement, you could provide information to inform him/her. This would at least have the possibility of resolving the fact that your friend is ignorant about something (like we all are).

But if your friend just said something like “Obama is a n**ger!”, what information could you provide to counter that confusion? Nothing. So, in this case, what benefit could come from answering the comment, and what could you say?

I have a Facebook account that I use once or twice a year to post a few photos of the kids and communicate with some of my older relatives who forgot that there is something called email. But there are relatives that had friended me and then just posted some of the worst and most confused ideas I had ever heard coming from someone who wasn’t wearing a swastika. I just blocked most of them and unfriended the most egregious.

The thing is – it seems like you are feeling the pain of some jackass making a racial slur on Facebook. The corrective might be to just remove yourself from the equation by blocking or unfriending so that you are not exposed to this nonsense. You’ll likely feel better, and s/he has one less vicitim.

Switch FB for Fluther: That’s when I get modded…a lot.

I’ve learned the hard way that Facebook just isn’t the place for intelligent discussions. Why would someone dumb enough to post something so ignorant be willing to all of a sudden engage in an intellectually stimulating argument with you? I say drop it, and I admit I feel the same way you do at times.

“All it takes for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing.” I would probably say I resent or disagree with that remark and then hide the post. I wouldn’t try to reason them out of it but I would say something. Fortunately I usually don’t come across that kind of remark on my FB page.

@janbb Your answer stopped me in my tracks. Thank you for writing it.

It really depends upon the circumstance. What is the relationship between you and the offender? How often do they post statements that bother you?

Here is a list of options available based upon how the two questions above are answered:
* Post a response on the thread providing facts that prove the statement wrong.
* Send a private message with your thoughts.
* Ignore it.
* Hide the individual post.
* Hide all posts that come from the app. (like a game or specific news source, etc.) no matter who posts it.
* Hide all of the peson’s posts from your News Feed.
* Unfriend them.
* Block them.

I’ve done all of the above at some point. It just depends upon how much I care about the person, what they posted, and its frequency.

I always figure I have “bigger fish to fry”, but very true @janbb. It happens so often though, that I think I’d start feeling like a troll. In fact, I did when I used to respond. Now I save my speaking out for real life.

@hominid, he used that word while stating Faux “facts.” My nephew posted a negative bumper sticker about Obama. I pointed out to him that he’s still on my brothers insurance because of Obamacare. Then his friend started talking Benghazi, and using the N word in every sentence.
I rebutted with facts and it went on from there. He’s just a stupid kid and a scared for his job oilfield worker. I shouldn’t get worked up over it but I hate to see my nephew caught up in hate mongering.
The other was not so much an argument but I got blocked from posting on The Christian Left page because I said it was anti science to take ancient Jewish tradition and believe a child isn’t a child until after it has given birth. In this day and age with ultrasounds and children surviving when being born at 20 weeks it’s as crazy to say a full term fetus is not a child as it is to say a fertilized ovum is a child or that the world is 6000 years old. Extremism at either end bugs me.

@janbb, that’s why I couldn’t just leave it there.

Ya know, this is just making me think how lucky we are to have Fluther. For all its flaws, we don’t get that kind of ignorance and bigotry here. The discourse is, for the most part, on a much more thoughtful level.

@Judi: “I shouldn’t get worked up over it but I hate to see my nephew caught up in hate mongering.”

This actually adds a more complicated dimension to this. Your nephew is someone you care about, and you likely see him as both worth saving and it’s possible to save him. In this case, reaching out to him privately might create an opportunity for him to expand his understanding while not feeling defensive about having to play the anti-Obama thing up. The culture we live in (the group of friends, etc) and peer pressure can be a powerful thing.

@janbb: “All it takes for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing.”

I agree with this statement but completely disagree with it being applied here. Calling someone out on Facebook for being racist when they call Obama a “n**ger” is doing nothing as well. It’s not clearing up confusion about facts or dispelling a myth. It’s just as likely to strengthen the person’s racism. He knows he is racist and is advertising it by using the racial slurs. He is using it to signal for people who agree with him and to gain from the rush of having people call him out on it. There is no room for rationality or facts here.

Of course, if you are in a real life situation and some person is yelling “n**ger” at someone, then you have the opportunity to act.

@hominid That’s why I wouldn’t argue back and forth on FB but I would need to say that I don’t agree. Silence is complicity even if it doesn’t change minds.

I had two people on my FB page whose posts I disagreed with. None were as overt as that and I just hid most of their posts.

I usually ignore because I feel like I could argue all day and not change the person’s mind. If they make a claim that is supposedly factual, and I know it’s definitely not true, I will occasionally post an article refuting, or maybe a Snopes.com link showing that what they’re saying isn’t true. Normally I don’t even do that, as I really feel it’s futile to try to change people’s minds on things like this.

If they have a personal opinion about Obama or something similar that is not factual, I don’t bother. When it comes to politics, for the most part I try not to argue with people. I am not going to change their minds and they are not going to change mine.

I simply ignore.

I feel really fortunate to have burned off all my need to debate that kind of stuff here on Fluther. I kind of feel sorry for folks who make Facebook their platform, because it’s silly to air that shit in front of friends and family. Anyway, I never respond because that is pointless. Rarely, I will unfollow or hide someone. But mostly, I’ll make an effort to tolerate/not react to the phenomena of a person caught up in their vitriol.

I had all kinds of vitriol once upon a time. What I learned is that what I believe, in that way, doesn’t change how the world turns. Someone’s prejudiced remarks aren’t going to change anything. They’re just having their experience of the world.

When you hold on to a greater truth, remarks like that become insignificant.

@Judi Thank you for the context of the particular situations. When it is a family member, I send a private message. Two factors are assumed: 1.) They don’t know all of the facts, and 2.) They don’t know the potential repercussions for posting false information.

A private message and how it is worded can net the desired response, as long as the sender is open to insight. (Meeting in person or picking up the phone is even better.) Both my SO and I have nieces and nephews that post items on FB that are factually wrong, self-indulgent and/or potentially embarrassing to the family. If it is important enough to be addressed, it is done so privately, sincerely, and with an open mind.

As for The Christian Left page, this is another case where the response has to be worded carefully if a result is desired. It can be said in such a way that evokes discussion without putting others on the defense.

Some people are just not interested in reason or accuracy. And those people are called people that aren’t my friends on Facebook. I’ll only respond to an ignorant comment if I know that this person should know better, or that I believe that this person would consider changing their opinion to fit facts. A moron or a hater is not worth my time, because nothing is going to be accomplished. I don’t need to reply to every inaccurate post anymore because I know some people are so off base with their comments, that I can tell that reasonable replies will just be ignored and waste my time. But, I removed all those people when I made a new Facebook profile

I try to ignore it.

The trash is often put out there by people as bait. They don’t look for an honest reaction or feedback. All they’ll do is add another insult on top.

I have a similar and far more complicated issue with some whatsApp groups that I’m in. One particular that consists of about ten dear childhood friends and their spouses. One of these is so ignorant and still opinionated that it quite often triggers a reaction from me.

My wife has forbidden me to respond to this “lady” and mostly I am wise enough to remain quiet. Once a year, though, on average, I lose my cool. And on whatsapp you can’t edit or delete your post.

In this circumstance I would go along with what people said about sending a private message to a relative, especially a younger relative, and remind him that letting friends post racist stuff on his page without him standing up means he is acting in a racist manner too.

In other circumstances I have not been shy about defending people who have made racist comments in response to points I have made. I posted something decrying the Zimmerman acquittal after killing Trayvon Martin. An old college friend posted some statements that Martin deserved it, and after a back and forth on his racism (all in front of about 25 mutual friends) I defended him.

Healthy discourse and argument and discussion is one thing; I will not abide hate on my page no matter who it is from.

I don’t get that much hate stuff on my page. I just have a couple of ignorant red necks who I went to school with who keep talking about their 2nd amendment right and God. And they demand religious freedom. It’s easy enough to ignore.

When it comes to things like racism and stuff, I think people should say things. If we’re really trying to get better as a society, someone has to let people know what they’re saying is not okay. It has nothing to do with trying to take away your free speech or whatever. It’s about trying to actually move on and make our species better.

Like do people not realize little children aren’t born to hate? That stuff is always taught and most of the time the kid will grow up and understand, but other times that kid is going to grow up and not learn, then the next thing you know they’re in a position of power due to nepotism and they’re ruining people’s livelihood because of their crappy ideology.

Problem is, some people don’t want society to get better. :(

I’m learning not to engage. It’s tough and it sucks. But there will always be stupid people, forever, and arguing rarely changes them, and I’m finding that my own anger is like poison to my soul. I’m learning to let it go.

@Blackberry, thanks for the validation. I was torn between wondering whether I was being sucked in or standing up. I always hoped I was a stand up kind of person.

@janbb “Ya know, this is just making me think how lucky we are to have Fluther. For all its flaws, we don’t get that kind of ignorance and bigotry here. The discourse is, for the most part, on a much more thoughtful level.”

Exactly. Which is why Facebook has pretty much been replaced by Fluther, for me. I visit FB about once a week – and, as you all know, I check in with my jellies at least once a day, often more.

I would ignore it and/or delete/unfollow the person. Because saying something wouldn’t lead to anything positive.

I immediately unfriended a person who posted a picture of a white teenager supposedly pooping on President Obama. How is that funny?

UGH! The worst was today! Someone posted This disgusting article and I couldn’t remain silent! For my own mental health I should just write her off and unfriend her but the altruistic side of me says that if I allow this kind of bigotry to go unchallenged nothing will ever change! My wise daughter says that it’s about relationships and you can never effect change in peoples hearts by running from the relationship when things get hard and sticky. That keeps buzzing through my head every time I want to vomit.