If your child did something illegal would you turn him/her in?

Depends on what he/she did. If it was selling smack or something like that, no. If it was robbing a bank absolutely no. If they like raped a kid or something then yeah, probably.

It would depend on what it was.

I was absolutely in agreement with the brother of the Unabomber Ted Kocynski, who worked with the Feds to get Ted Kocynski arrested and caught. Since he was murdering people, I felt the brother did the right thing.

“Something illegal” is just too vague. It’s troubling that so many of the hypothetical questions at fluther share this trait.

@stanleybmanly and that vagueness is a part of the question. The overarching question here is how you feel about family vs Joe average citizen? Does the severity of what they did affect your decision or the fact that they were related to you colors your actions regardless of the circumstances?

There are laws that cover a variety of subjects; some we might agree with, others we would not. Would you be more inclined to turn them in if you agreed with the specific law and not do so if you thought it was a stupid or unnecessary law that violated your personal rights or do you have more of “the law is the law and therefore what you did is wrong” type personality? Are you more prone to turn them in if the commit a crime against a person (say assault) as opposed to property (say vandalism)? What if the person deserved assaulting (in your opinion)? Would you hide them or, if you knew where they were, lie to the authorities about having this knowledge? Are you more likely to give them the benefit of the doubt or believe their side of the story without even hearing the other side, at least not in a court of law.

I am very much of the opinion that there are both huge variations in both the gravity as well as relevance of laws. Then there are laws that are flat out unjust or onerous. So will I dial 911 when my kid jay walks or removes the tag from his mattress? Is that the question? Wouldn’t it be better to ask “what sort of crime would your child have to commit before you would turn him in?”

Not exactly @stanleybmanly that is part of the question; does your perception of the severity of the violation affect your judgment or actions and the rest of the question is are you less likely to do so with your child than with with a stranger or a colleague from work or a friend?

It is a question not only of the illegal act but also the age and circumstances. See your 16 yr old kid speeding through a stop light? My punishment/response would be much more onerous than reporting him to a cop. Learn of a 22 yr old hiding from the law because of a violent incident in a drug deal? I would work with him to get a lawyer and turn himself in.

Learn of a 35 yr old child molesting children or beating a family member? I would call Family Services and then the police.

@rojo The answer is yes to both questions. Of course the kid takes priority in the list of reluctance. But let’s forget about my relatives or folks I know and care about, and address the issue of “at what point are you willing to snitch somebody out?” At this point I’m beginning to realize that I should not have answered this question initially.

^^ Thank you for your time and input.

Initially, my response was… ‘of course not’, but then…

Most likely not, unless I feel it would be the only way of stopping his behaviour and that behaviour was truly immoral and causing serious misery to others.

Besides… illegal is – as written earlier – too vague. Many illegal things are not immoral and sometimes they even are ‘the right thing to do’.

This is one of the few parenting questions that, as a non-parent, I cannot guess my response to without experience. It would depend on the child, the crime, the consequences, and the ethics involved.

And I don’t even know if I would respond in the moment the way I would given all the hypothetical facts.

No clue, would only be able to find out in the unlikely event of those circumstances occuring.