Relationship Advice?

Sounds like she’s looking to replace you, but on her terms and in her own time, not yours. Be prepared, dude!

What sort of mistakes? Are we talking poor communication or that type of thing or forgetting to buy her a birthday present or leaving your socks on the floor? What sort of mistakes are you making that you’re not allowed to fix?

Small mistakes poor communication. We just got together so we are still figuring out dos and donts. In simplest form I accidently broke something of hers that we both worked for and it meant something to her. Told her I’d replace it and that I was sorry and she wouldn’t accept that. She doesn’t seem to accept apologies or requests to fix things she just waits till she’s over it and wants to act like it never happened. But she wants to fix her mistakes doesn’t let me fix mine lol it’s annoying

Sounds like a tough and unfeeling girl. Are you sure this is who you want? Start being a tiny bit distant/aloof and see how she reacts.

I’m not getting that she’s unfeeling. Is it possible she lack confidence and self-esteem? So she can make mistakes and should fix them but she doesn’t want to challenge you to resolve your errors and mistakes? Which feels right to you in terms of her actions and attitude? That she’s unfeeling and selfish or controlling or that she perhaps lacks confidence and would rather let your errors slide?

@ZEPHYRA yeah I’ve done that. She reacts. Distance and Ignoring gets the best reaction. Me and her are both 21 and we are both competitive. We have a ton of fun and love each other a lot. She’s just not as open about feelings as I am. And that’s weird because most girls I’ve been with have been way more open than me. @Earthbound_Misfit I think all of those could be right but what do I do lol?

I would speak to her about it. Pick your moment and be gentle about it but let her know that when you make errors you want an opportunity to make amends and to learn from and correct your behaviour. That you’re aware of your own foibles and are willing to try to address them is a sign of your maturity. You need to make it clear to her that this is bothering you. That you don’t want to be let off when you make an error and that you want to keep working on your own self-development but also on your relationship.

It sounds like you like her or you wouldn’t be prepared to try to resolve this. So let her know you’re interested in her and your relationship and want it to keep improving. See if being honest and straightforward helps. I’m not into game playing. I believe being direct (in a nice way) is the best way to solve relationship woes. That way both of you know where you stand and there is less likelihood of miscommunication. Let us know how you go!

Misfit thanks. I actually did this but I’m neurotic and I feel when I do this type of thing it pushes her away. I don’t want her to feel so much pressure to change. I’m the type of guy that likes to be very involved in relationships an outgoing type. She’s sort of the same but different. It would suck if this is what breaks us apart.

If it was me, I’d tell her that’s your fear. I really don’t believe much is to be gained by trying to push things under the carpet. If there’s a problem, get it out in the open so you can talk about it and try to resolve it. Perhaps she doesn’t realise how serious you are about it OR perhaps she finds dealing with problems confronting. That’s why I think being gentle about how you approach it is important but not so gently she doesn’t realise how important this is to you.

I hope you can resolve things but if you can’t perhaps you’re not meant to be together? Having very different communication styles can be worked through, but it takes effort and sometimes one or both parties aren’t willing to make the investment.

You certainly sound more sensitive. Be careful, sone women take advantage of this.

Not something anyone can help you with unless you describe the kinds of mistakes you are talking about. Did you do a terrible job on the grout in the bathroom, or did you sleep with someone else? Likewise, what are her “mistakes”?