When can a child be given freedom?

It sounds as if your father comes from another cultural tradition than the US. I personally believe that girls absolutely own their own lives and destinies, and should choose their own paths. But your father doesn’t, and you are living under his roof.

Here is what I would do. Do not argue with him. It is fruitless. You will not change his mind. You have to hold your own truth to yourself. If you believe it, that is enough.

Then I would get through high school. If you can, save up some money. If it is possible, go to college somewhere far away from home.

Then I would plan to break off contact for a while with my family. I would get my own job and apartment and life.

Yeah Marinelife, I tried arguing and explaining but he seems so resistant! Hmm, maybe you are right but his words are so discouraging, he would say you cant go anywhere, you lack skills, you wont reach high in life and all that shit all the time.

@Khajuria9 Ignore him. He is trying to keep you down. His words come from his own wounds—they are not really about you at all.

Look around you for other role models. For example, Alice Allison Dunnigan or you might find some of the information in this document helpful.

Hang in there.

Angela Merkel became chancellor of Germany.
What has he done with his life?

No man, no wounds, he has had no wounds, he is quite well educated, is in a significant position and is an avid reader but is a biased personality. He is baised on religious matters, about girls and their freedom, maybe you can call him a male chauvinistic, and my mom is like a perfect servant of his, but I cant be.

What country do you live in, if I may ask?

First I’d like to express my opinion on your last question—- Yes, I think it’s terrible.
And second, I think it matters more that when you are ready to be independent instead of when you should be independent. Thus, since you’re asking this question, I’m gonna go for now. I think you are ready to start to think for yourself and try to find what you’re looking for right now.

And for a little more advice, you can try to google controlling people/ parents. I did it, too, and I remember there’ve been many articles/ advice/ researches about this. Some advice on how to deal with these situations/ people and to speak affirmatively for yourself and avoid stuck in the traps between their words can help.

You are not a child, you are an intelligent mature woman. He needs to deal with that, but I’m not sure he can in your culture. We can talk if you want.

I would also ask, like Janbb, where are you from? your father’s opinion sounds like out of a different time and place. It might be hard to counter such an argument if you are in a culture where that argument is the norm. In that situation, going against one’s parent might present a rupture that you don’t want. Perhaps, since he is a great reader, as you say, you could provide him with some literature to read that will open his heart and mind. But I would do this at a calm time, and not at a time when you are having a confrontation with him.

skfinkel, no, I cant make him read, he would never listen, all he reads for is to gain power over others to control them better, he thinks he is the emperor. He would still say, no matter how many articles he gets to read that girls can’t own freedom, they are and should be slaves, to the parents at first, and to the ones they live with, next.
janbb and skfinkel, I am from India (This nation sucks)