Do you have a will and, if not, why not?

I have had a will since the birth of my first child, umpteen years ago. We modified it after our second child but it was more of a technicality than a necessity. The first version had provisions for other progeny, we just added a name.
Mine goes to my wife first and the kids thereafter. Hers goes to me then the kids. We had provisions in there that covered guardianship if the children were minors and we both kicked and we ended up separating who handled the money and who looked after the children. We just felt one was more mature and responsible and having to justify an expenditure would keep from having the children given ponies because they wanted one.

Incidently, my dad would not have a will for many years. We think he thought that if he wrote one he would be signing his death warrant. We never could get him to a lawyer but turns out he handwrote one and had two of his neighbors witness it. We found it in his drawer after he died. He left everything to mom or if she were gone, to be split evenly between us kids.
A couple of problems could have cropped up, one of the witnessing neighbors had died before he did and, not having named an executor, it could have been bad if we all had not been on good terms with each other.

Yes. A will was made up by a lawyer when I was in my early 30s. The reason for it’s creation was I bought a house and didn’t want the housemate to be able to claim any financial benefit should something happen. It will be changed as soon as the SO and I marry.

You are not the grim reaper. It is a topic that is part of reality. What worries me the most is when parents do not have wills and risk their child(ren) being the responsibility of the state (in the US) because they never wanted to prepare for the “What if?”. In many states, a simple will that is handwritten or created online and notarized will suffice.

There are other factors that should be considered as well: Financial power of attorney, medical power of attorney, living will, last instructions (how to carry out preferred funeral desires, any other requests), and an advance directive.

I used to work for an estate planning/elderlaw attorney in college, and I asked him “who should have a will?” His answer was people who own property (real estate) or people who have children should all have a will.

I have a child, am in my late 40’s and do not have a will. My daughter’s father is deceased. I should do one, know I should and yet have been procrastinating. I know that if anything should happen to me, custody would go to my parents, and if they are not around, it would go to my next of kin, which is my sister, who is very able financially and physically to care for my daughter. I have considered doing a will online but have not looked into it. I know that best practice is it’s filed with the local surrogate.

My Ex and I had made wills a long time ago and once I got divorced, I remade mine quickly. I also have an advanced care directive that specifies my health care proxy.

Nope. I’m not even thirty yet. I plan to live forever.

So far, so good.

I made a will with a will writing program when my son was born, and later my ex and I did a full-on lawyer one. That is still in effect, with it all going to the kids. But i really need to re do it since circumstances have changed and the kids are older and things don’t need to be held in trust any more.

I am dumb and have not done it yet.

Yes and I set up a living trust for my wife and I two years ago for 2 reasons. Protection from lawsuits against my business and the draconian probate statutes of Illinois.

I do. Not that the recipient of it is gonna get a hell of a lot haha.

Yes! I wouldn’t be caught dead without it.

lol

Of course; had one since I was in my 30s.

One guy lived with his SO for 25 years and his mother got his 401k because NY does not recognize a live in as a spouse.
Anyone in that position cannot bitch, they chose to play by rules that left them at a disadvantage. If they say you can use the skateboard park but if you don’t wear a helmet or other safety equipment, if you are injured you can’t sue us, and you suffer a terrible head injury requiring very expensive surgery, you can’t cry foul.

As far as the question goes, I have nothing now of real monetary value that anyone would fight over, so no will as of late.

No. I can’t decide who to leave my stuff to other than my brother and I’m worried he could die before me.

@longgone remember what the philosopher Geddy Lee said: ”.... we’re only immortal for a limited time.”

Are you saying you don’t have one @LuckyGuy? I’ve had one since I was in my early 20s and recently updated it again. I do still need to sit down with my children, my jewellery, artworks and the like and to get them to say if there’s anything they particularly want. I’d rather discuss this with them myself than have them argue or feel aggrieved later.

Everyone should have a will, if only to stop the state taking a large chunk of your estate in fees.

My business partner added a rider to his leaving me his Harley. His wife knows and is happy that she doesn’t have to deal with it. She has never liked it since he bought it 30+ years ago.

Nope. I don’t have anything but books and trinkets. In CA, my partner will get all of my stuff. I’ll do it eventually. I’m only 41.

No. I don’t own much anyway, and only hope I’m disposed of in an environmentally conscious way. As for my bank account, well who needs a few cobwebs?

Things that you will don’t have to be valuable. They can be precious emotionally. After people die, fights don’t just emerge because of the things of monetary value, often they’re about the emotional pieces. Plus, we all have friends and people we love and having expressed our preferences in a will ensures there is no confusion about our wishes. Even if our only family is our pet, we need to ensure our final wishes are clearly expressed to those who have to clean up our final details.

Good point, @Earthbound_Misfit. I’ve seen major family rifts over cheap cars, china, silverware, furniture, crematory ashes – it’s amazing how family dynamics change once a person dies.

So true @jca. People will fight over crazy things. I guess after someone we love dies, our emotions are fraught too so we may not be acting rationally. Even things like photo albums or costume jewellery can cause family break-ups.

Also, I don’t know what it’s like in the US, but if you die intestate in Australia the government’s trustee steps in and they charge like wounded bulls. Plus here, if people work, their employer will have been contributing superannuation payments each payday, so they’ll have some money behind them. Even if it’s not a lot, I think most people would rather say where even their small amount of assets go after they die.

I have a will, a living will and a safe harbor trust.
Everything goes to my wife.
If we both die at the same time or my wife dies first then it all goes to designated charities. Nothing to family or friends.

I keep meaning to write one, but I haven’t yet. Right now, I have so much more debt than assets, that it’s hard to believe anyone would get anything out of it. But I should at least leave someone my passwords and things. And at best, yes, write that will.

I don’t have a official one since I don’t really have any physical assets. I doubt there will be much of a fight over my computer and pee-stained mattress. They will be fighting over who has to make the trip to Goodwill to get rid of my crap.

I do have instructions on my desk under my monitor with info and passwords about how to pull money from my stocks and push that into my bank account and withdrawal the cash along with info about my life insurance.

@johnpowell: Unless I’m mistaken, once you die, your assets freeze which means nobody will be able to withdraw money from your accounts.

@johnpowell If you make someone the beneficiary on the accounts the assets will move to them even without a will. It is easy.

@Earthbound_Misfit Yes I do have a will. I am only playing with what I call “make a difference” payments. That is money that would go to people and places where it would make a difference and be a hand up

I do have a will, though I don’t know that there will be that much that I will be leaving. I am not planning on scrimping when I retire for the soul purpose of giving away money after I am gone. I am currently planning on making a modification to my will. My slacker nephew, my one and only descendant, looks like he is going to be waiting on tables for the rest of his life and I am afraid that if I left him a lump sum, he would blow it all. I am thinking the best thing would be to set up a trust that would give him a monthly payment.

@LostInParadise A trust for your nephew seems like a wise move. I have a similar situation with my nephew. He is so far behind in bills but as soon as he gets some cash he blows it on (what i wold consider) crap. A Four Wheeler?! Really?! You can’t pay your mortgage and you buy a a f-ing 4 wheeler?!?. “It’s only $100 per month.” And he has fancy Cable TV: over $100 per month (no internet) . ”“It’s my entertainment.”

I have a living will and as my ability to invest savings grows, I find myself having a similar desire to push some monies in the direction of really good hard working people…and not just because they need a break. What attracts me the most are those who work hard and easily put a roof over their head and food on the table and even though real life knocks them to their knees they keep getting up and doing what needs to be done the entire time often sacrificing their own needs for their family and even animals they love.

But before I ever get that ‘68 Camaro I have wanted for 40 years….there will be a crew of deserving people who will get a break they need before I get an old Camaro.

(I feel like I am answering a question I wrote…surreal)