Do you have a very strong memory of feeling safe as a small child?
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longgone (
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October 26th, 2015
I discussed this with friends recently, and we found that all of us have a certain memory which brings us back to being very young, feeling as safe as possible. For all of us, these were particulary powerful memories, and we couldn’t remember feeling as safe since.
I’m wondering: Are we just happy to have been loved, or might this feeling of safety be something children actively look for and do not forget easily?
My memory is that of lying in bed between my parents, falling asleep there after waking up from nightmares.
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7 Answers
It was not so much a matter of feeling safe as never feeling unsafe. My small world at home was all that I knew as a small child. Because I grew up in a middle class home with loving parents, feeling safe came as naturally as breathing. I don’t ever remember consciously thinking that this was a really safe place.
Not since I was 4 and my brother died. I can’t really remember prior to that but I assume I felt safe.
Childhood comes with its own set of anxieties. That’s the compensation for being unable to appreciate many of the fears afflicting adults.
I have a few very strong memories of feeling unsafe, but no, I didn’t have a very warmfuzzy family life.
Like @LostInParadise I could not pinpoint one period or memory when I felt safe as a child; I never felt unsafe with which to compare it. My early childhood was uneventful I guess; growing up with mom (dad was at sea a lot , months gone but home for months) various aunts, uncles, cousins and my grandmother. A close knit family that lived close by each other and were always together. I remember it with love. That changed when we moved to the US when I was 10 but even though I missed them all terribly and have felt this void ever since, I never felt like I was not in capable hands.
Like others I grew up in a warm stable and comfortable environment in which the concept of ‘unsafe’ did not exist. Sometimes my life felt too constricted and I envied adults who could do what they wanted.I didn’t realise how unsafe their world was.
I’ve never felt safe.
Recently reading an old newspaper clipping of my father appearing in court for aggravated assault against me when I was 3 might have something to do with that…
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