Did you know that we are all doomed when the earth catches fire today?

I can help these people. We all know that it is as easy for a rich person to get into heaven as it is for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle. I can relieve these people of all their filthy lucre. As a Jew I have no chance of salvation, but I can take on the burden of the excess of wealth of others to assure their eternal bliss.

Sweetie, that was back in October. We’re still here.

Yep. The world was roasted on 7 October. I often wonder if in parallel universes the folks holding these beliefs are vindicated. I can just see them expiring happily proclaiming “see?”

I guess this means that I can stop paying my mortgage!!! How cool is that.

I guess that means it’s pointless to boycott Starbucks today?

Oh, wait! What if anyone in possession of a secularized, non-snowflaked, Starbucks Christmas “Holiday” cup won’t be called to the Rapture?

Tough choice, that.

And don’t let the heathens blind you with all that mumbo-jumbo about “dates” and “the calendar”. Stick to your guns!

Why the heck didn’t you tell me sooner?!?! I would have skipped this morning’s spinning/pilates class, and I wouldn’t be bothering with the laundry.

@Seek
Hon, this must be for the left over sinners this month…
Perhaps one can wait for December’s.
Just submerge yourself in a bathtub today!

So many doomsdays; so little time. With all the various “prophets” out there endlessly proclaiming, it’s just so hard to keep track of them all.

I don’t even bother trying to keep track. I like surprises :)

Well, hells bells! Now I have to return all this stuff I bought.
Tsk.