What punishments make one stronger?

Loneliness.

If you don’t appreciate _____, then you won’t mind going without it.
(anything you were stupid about as a kid)

If your trying to waste my time, as well as everyone else’s, then let’s get together on your time and we’ll see what we can do!
(those who thrive on disruption)

Don’t tease the dog/cat, and then you won’t get your face taken off.
(me to my nephews, a million years ago)

Why don’t you do things that make you stronger so that you are stronger and reward yourself for doing those things?

We are taught to not punish the children in our care, but to reward good behaviour. Don’t get me wrong, there are still tactics we have to use in some of the most trying cases. A child will have them and their chair removed from the table at meal time if they persist in doing something they have already been told not to. If they harm another child, they have to listen to us tell them it was a bad choice and that they made the other child cry while making eye contact and then apologise. The most improvement comes when we praise the same kids when we catch them doing something good. I’ve seen huge changes in a child’s ability to socialise and play with their peers using these techniques. They respond to positive reinforcement. Every time we have to intervene in conflict or chide a child, we have to work even harder to build those kids up with positive reinforcement.

No body improves their natural behaviour by being punished all the time. This has been proven in study after study, not just with children but in work environments with adults too. It builds confidence, self esteem, empathy, friendships. These all build up a person’s ability to improve their executive function so they can drive their lives themselves and not be constantly told what to do or be picked back up after they take a nosedive so hard that they’ve lost their jobs, their relationships. their cars….

Being taught self-awareness is also a big help, especially for those with personalities and thought processes that are hard-wired and where empathy and executive function come less automatic, like autistic people, DS, sociopathy, borderline personality disorders. They have to be taught self awareness in addition to build executive function and the earlier that starts with someone with, say, autism (when possible) the more tools they will build to help them deal with the challenges in life.

Self-imposed punishments are more meaningful than externally imposed ones – and that goes across the board, for physical strength as well as mental ability and even penmanship/

But @cazzie makes a good point. Moderation.

Removal of reward is probably the only effective punishment for punishment sake.
If there is a system whereby an individual earns (to them) valuable rewards to reinforce positive behavior, then those rewards can be denied to punish poor behavior.

If you’re a scrawny or obese person, push-ups don’t make you stronger. They humiliate you and make you even more resentful of physical exercise.

Writing lines on the blackboard, when I was a kid, had nothing to do with penmanship, and everything to do with prolonged humiliation in front of your peers. The reserved kids got even more reserved, the show-offs enjoyed the attention.

The only punishments that really make you stronger are those that mesh with your personality.
If someone is meting out punishment to help a person grow, they’ll choose something that causes self reflection or personal challenge.
If someone is trying to break your spirit, they’ll choose punishments designed to make you fail.

For some reason I think of John McCain. POW subjected to horrific torture including breaking his bones over and over in the same places. When 99% of us would have given in or been driven mad, he grew stronger.

The punishments that make us stronger are those that challenge our individual strengths.