(NSFW ) What changes to my body should I worry about as I get older?

Brian Posehn has a comedy special called The Fartist and he jokes about this topic. He mentions that no one ever tells you that you’ll have a leaky dick when you get older. It’s a funny moment during his routine.

Old injuries will come back to haunt you.

You will start to forget, um, thingies, um, what was that word?, doohickies, um, whatchamacallits and other stuff. Oh, and peoples names.

Your ears and nose will grow bigger but your pecker won’t.

Urinary and fecal incontinence, dementia, brittle bones, all sorts of cancer, bad eye sight, aching joints, random bouts of necrosis, and spontaneous cases of exitus.

Sorry for not being funny. Just want you to know that you can avoid the funny and serious bummers that typically happen to old folks.

Please note: I’m not a medical doctor.

You can look at what has become of so many old people and get an idea of what can happen to the aging body. The truth is no one knows what will be your old age result. Nothing is for certain in this life. But it is fairly certain that if you abuse your body by years of just letting yourself go (get fat, lazy, eat wrong and do drugs, tobacco and alcohol) then you’ll wind up sick, weak and miserable. However take a look at the life of Jack LaLanne who make it to 96 lean fit and strong.

You can increase your chances of making it to elderly stages of life and still be healthy and relatively strong by taking good care of your body and brain. How? It’s not easy but it is simple and you can do it!

1. Eat a healthy diet. Lay off the booze, tobacco and other drugs.
2. Exercise regularly and vigorously (if ok’d by a doctor to do so).
3. Get adequate sleep.

If you take charge of and responsibility for your own health when you’re young (and make healthy living your life-style) then you will have a chance to make it to old age like Jack LaLanne. Remember that doctors or the government can not make you healthy. That’s your job. Good luck!