Why does he stare at me if he already has a girlfriend?

It sounds like he isn’t as crazy about his girlfriend as he may let on. I’d guess he’s looking for a new one. Like you.
He may stay in his current relationship because it is convenient and socially acceptable for the time being.

He might also just enough the flirting and being noticed. In any case, if I were you I wouldn’t go beyond that as long as he’s in a relationship (assuming it’s a monogamous relationship), and just enjoy the attention.

Though then again, you might also want to limit your interactions with him to the most superficial, as it can be difficult to keep the current distance if you don’t – for him as well.

Probably just sizing you up before he jumps ship.

@ARE_you_kidding_me Is probably right. He doesn’t want to leave a sure thing with the GF he now has without having a replacement lined up first. If not you, it will be someone else. His mind is made up, now it is just a matter of time.

He may well be running the flag up the pole to see if the cat wants to lick it.

He lacks loyalty and personal conviction. Pretending to be one way when your feelings are elsewhere is a form of dishonestly. If he can’t live honestly between thought and deed he isnt worthy of your honest affections. Ignore him until he grows the fuck up.

You can expect that he will do to you exactly what he’s doing to her now. He is looking to have some need fulfilled. He thought she could do it but found she couldn’t. You won’t either. He is looking for an external fix to an internal problem. Wookin’ pa nub in da wong pwaces, in other words.

Agreed, it’s a shitty and insecure thing to do. Most guys won’t wait to have the next lady lined up. They’ll just leave and be alone for a while. It’s been my experience that women are more apt to string a guy along while they look around. Evolutionary reasons are obvious.

Why do you think that you need to wait for him to do whatever it is you think he maybe might want to do? (It’s a rhetorical question; I’m not expecting a response.)

If you like him, well, you’ve already stated that he’s not married. The hell with his other relationship; declare your intent, make your move to claim him and insist that he shuck off the other girl, pronto and definitively. And if you do that and find him treating you the way he’s treating the other girl now, then shuck him off yourself just as forthrightly.

Be fully at cause over your relationships. All of them. Don’t wait to be the effect of his or anyone else’s possible-maybe-hesitant-sort-of-but-sort-of-not-limited-intention and affection. That’s no way to live! Take the reins, girl.

But if he skulks around you and pretends that he doesn’t have a girlfriend that he really does have; if he acts like she doesn’t exist when she’s not right there on his arm; if he isn’t forthright and honest in all his dealings with her and with you, then he’s no prize to begin with. In that case I would suggest that you take up a whip, instead and drive him away for good (figuratively).

But my real answer is that anyone who asks the question that you have asked, for the reason that you have asked it, is not really ready for a boyfriend-girlfriend committed relationship in the first place. By all means, date, flirt, enjoy boys’ company – many boys and in parallel, you’re far too immature to commit (and I’m not being critical here, just real) – and do not commit until you have no need to ask such questions.

Staring like that doesn’t necessarily mean more than he finds you attractive. I won’t lie, I am extremely happy in my relationship, but I always check out other women. Not because I’m trying to find someone else, but because it just happens. Check this quiz out.

Wow. What an ego boost you are! He can have his girl, his ego, and you also! Pretty crowded in the restaurant booth. Not to mention the face-plant you will receive out of the blue from the GF when, not if, someone relishes to see a throw-down between you both. I can guarantee you that if you get to be that new squeeze, you will have one of two things occur. You become the new reason he can carry on his needed chase for the next person, or he mopes back to current GF to whine that he should never have left her in the first place.
Stop staring at the Moon, or you’ll fall in the midden. Out of all around you- he’s the one?
Open your eyes m’dear, look all around you. ‘Diamonds’ don’t grow in a garden now do they?

Well, if he tries to avoid the topic “girlfriend” in your presence there will be more to it than just checking out other girls. However, the responsibility to break up if he does not feel confident in his relationship is his, you are doing right to keep the distance.

You are 20 years old and still in college so you and I assume he have a lot of years ahead of you before you settle down. Since you seem to like this guy, my question would be how much do you like him. If he were to leave his current GF for you do you see yourself having a lot of fun with him? Are you really attracted to him because the person for you does not come around often. He has dropped a lot of hints your way and not sure if you have given him signals that you would be open to possibly a date or even a cup of coffee sometime. If you have not shown him a flicker of interest then he may have given up.

I met a girl at my college swimming pool and we kept running into each other almost every day and we chatted up a storm. Finally after a month I asked her out and she blurts out FINALLY you asked me out! She was beginning to think I was gay because I had not asked her out sooner as had all but given up on me asking her out. So based on my own experience he simply may think you are not interested in him. So him not coming out and asking you out may have a bit to do with him having a GF and a bit thinking you may not be interested in him. I am just saying if you really think he may be a lot of fun to be with, take that chance and have some fun while you are young and free to do so.