Why did he ignore the dare?
So my friend had a little party outing today, and we went to dinner and then bowling. On our way to bowling we invited our friend who is two years younger, and he joined us there. After, I mentioned them coming over to watch a movie, and everyone agreed. Once we got to my house, someone came up with the idea of playing truth or dare. Now, first of all, my friend likes this kid very much. So, one, I keep my distance because he can get touchy, and, two, I don’t like him at all ( in that way), so naturally if he does get touchy, I walk away to send a message. Anyway, back to truth or dare, I get one to kiss the person to my left on the cheek. As it happens, it turns out to be him, and I hesitated, thinking that “why not, what does a kiss on the cheek matter?” I then proceeded to say, ” it’s up to (guy’s name).” He was on his phone at the time before the question was asked and my friend mentioned he probably didn’t hear it. He then answered back that he did, and then said nothing. We just moved on to another question after that. I don’t know what it is, but I sort of feel awkward and somewhat insecure. It’s frustrating me to no end. He wasn’t awkward with me and talked to me the rest of the night, but he was also really distracted on his phone. What do you guys think he meant by just skipping over the dare? ( Also, he kept suggesting to play “dirty” truth or dare, so that also lead me to make my decision, as I deduced he was in favor of the dare).
Observing members:
0
Composing members:
0
27 Answers
Sounds to me like you might partly be upset because, even though you didn’t like him, he rejected you. The fact he wanted to play dirty TOD suggests he may just have wanted to get laid or see naked girls. (Never far from our/men’s minds.) Thas why the kiss wasn’t interesting to him.
I’m the future, perhaps try and avoid playing games that could have you kissing (or worse ) someone you have no interest in leading on. Kissing him or something like that must have crossed your mind as a possibility, if not a forgone conclusion. There’s only one reason straight guys would play TOD. It probably will lead to something sexual….
I don’t have enough information to offer more than this speculative answer I’m afraid.
In addition, if you hang out with guys who try and touch you or other inappropriate behavior, don’t hang out with them.Carry mace at all times, and DON’T TRUST guys until you really know them. Often we’ll say whatever we think will get us in your pants….
@stanleybmanly: Looks like from OP’s other responses she is a senior in high school.
Yeah. How old? Did I unintentionally speak to a minor? I assumed (perhaps falsely) that this site was adults only…
I think there are teens on Fluther. I was just looking in the rules and I don’t see anything about a certain age, but I thought it was 13 or something like that.
@jca thanks. I don’t pay enough attention and as a result get abruptly slammed at moments with the realization that young, and I mean REALLY young people can hang out here. Overall, I’m pretty sure that this is a very good thing, but it can be startling at times.
Well , I wouldn’t have spoken to her AT ALL. I couldn’t find a way to delete my response. I formally retract all of my statements in regards to this question and to this questions ‘asker.’ I assumed that I was talking to someone of a legal age. Stupid of me…
I disagree. Where’s the harm in your advice? From what I see the validity of your answer has nothing to do with the age of the participants.
@MrGrimm888 -Relax! Your answer was appropriate for the situation, no matter what her age.
I feel I over stepped. My advice was meant for a female whom was older than 18. Really 21. I don’t feel I have the right to speak to a minor about subjects I broached.
You didn’t broach the subject, she did with her question. I can understand using caution in giving boy-girl advice. As a member of the collective you have a right to answer any question posed, regardless of the age of the asking Jelly.
Your advice applies whether she was 16 or 26 or 56.
I appreciate your advice tedibear.
Again. Thank you all. I had nothing but good intentions…
Unless you’re on parole for dealing with minors, I see no harm in your advice or reason why you should fret.
Jca. No. Nothing like that. Just a paranoid pessimist. Plus I might not want my daughter taking ‘my’ advice. I’m highly opinionated, but I stick to talking to people old enough to have there own opinions. I’d feel at home talking to my 14 yr old nephew, but if his parents had a different way they wanted him to deal with things I would want him to follow their advice. A stranger’s words shouldn’t have the weight of a parent or legal guardian’s…Assuming she can talk to them ( and it sucks if she cant) she needs to talk with them.
The parole thing wouldn’t matter either. Even horrible people are capable of good advice. The obverse is also true. Very good people renowned for their soundness can have lapses in judgement.
@MrGrimm888: Maybe she feels if she tells her parents she might be lectured about boys or maybe she wasn’t supposed to be at that location in the first place. My mother was that way – a lecture which made me pick and choose what I told her. Maybe she didn’t view it as a lecture, maybe she viewed it as “guidance and advice” but I viewed it as a lecture.
Yeah. I get that jca. But maybe she needs a lecture. But not from us. We don’t know her. Her parents or whomever might be more receptive than she thinks. Either way. You have to be honest with SOMEONE in your life. This girl needs a TRUE friend, or her closest relative. If she has neither, I bet she could find a friend or maybe she has one already. Like the friend she says likes the guy. IDK…
I dislike Truth or Dare immensely. Its entire purpose is to make people uncomfortable and embarrass them for doing things they wouldn’t normally consent to do anyway. I once found myself in a game of Truth or Dare one of the few times I was ever invited to a (small) party, and was ridiculed for months after that party because I wouldn’t run laps around the neighborhood without a shirt on. I was thirteen and a late bloomer, though I don’t know whether I would have been more comfortable had my status as the “eighth grade ironing board” not been so well established.
A kiss is a form of physical affection that is to be given to people you want to give it to, who want to receive it. That’s true whether it’s a deep, passionate kiss to a lover or a chaste kiss on the back of the hand to a stranger at the Renaissance Festival. It should never be the forfeit in a stupid game.
Guys, relax, I’m 18. That’s not what you call a minor.
Also, I’m plenty old enough to have my own opinion. I was simply seeking advice from an outside, unbiased source. You have all given me wonderful answers, and that is that. I see no reason why there is any concern with my age. Regardless of that fact, I am a human being, and if you think that I don’t have the qualifications to form my “own” opinions, then you stand immensely mistaken. You say you “stick to talking to people old enough to have there own opinions”. How could you assume such without even knowing my state of intellect or knowledge of the world and society? The degradation of teenagers and their abilities astounds me. I was at my OWN house with MY PARENTS permission. I simply was seeking a quick bit of advice. My friends all know him, and I would not prefer them to know my feelings on the matter, as they would surely tell him. This matter is also highly futile, so I see no need to talk with my parents about it. I was just looking for different perspectives.
@PixieGirl98 – No worries, this was a bit of a tempest in a teacup. @MrGrimm888 is new to the site as well and wasn’t aware of our rules. For what it’s worth, we allow anyone over 13 to participate here. Some websites are specifically adults-only and more punitive than ours. I can understand him wanting to cover his bases.
Either way, I hope both of you have enjoyed your foray into the Fluther, and come back and play with us more! We love adding new Jellies to the collective.
If you don’t like him that way, why do you care? Let it go.
Pixiegirl, I intended no disrespect. I perhaps could have articulated my feelings more clearly. I should have said old enough to legally have opinions that I, could legally discuss with you.
As far as knowing your state of intellect, I just know that teenagers don’t really ‘know’ NEAR as much as they think they do. There is no substitute for having to survive many years on this planet. Most young adults know lots of facts, like the capital of Brazil. But that doesn’t mean they know anything about Brazil. Living there or even visiting makes you far wiser. I’m sure this comment will make you feel as if I’m being dismissive of your intelligence ( that’s how I would’ve taken it at your age.) But I guess I’m just trying to remind you that you have a long way to go in life before you can look behind you. Talking and debating with people, like on this site is a good start. Go, and explore this world, safely please. If you survive 18 more years, you’ll know exactly why your words and opinions were not given enough credit sometimes. Plus ( to really anger you) your brain isn’t fully developed yet.
That being said, I do ‘value’ your opinion and look forward to speaking on other matters with you. As long as I won’t get in trouble for it. Hopefully you are 18. I’m going to pretend you are for my comfort level.
I am sorry if I have offended you. Peace and love.
@MrGrimm888 I appreciate your clarification, but all I desire is to be treated as an equal, despite my being much younger than many of you. You say that talking on this site or even speaking on more matters with you is what will make me a more experienced person (or at least get me on track), yet you question whether I should be on it at all? I have no plan of deceiving you on my age, and I am as old as I say I am. Also, I don’t know if it matters or will do any good, but I have worked at a hospital since I was 16, volunteering, and I have seen and experienced many horrible things. I am also a girl, and I’m sure not even you can personally attest to the cautions we must take to be seen as people (even in this day and age). As a person, you have no idea what I have experienced. Age may bring experience, but not always maturity and wisdom. Thank you for your civility and your help. Good day now.
Answer this question 
This question is in the General Section. Responses must be helpful and on-topic.
Composing members:
0
