What are your thoughts on "helicopter parenting" vs "free-range parenting"?

I think a combination of both is good at an early age. A balance of both never hurt anyone when used correctly.

I like the way that I was raised: with a strong moral code and rules about behavior, but the ability to play outside on my own, walk to the nearby candy store in packs, etc.

I’m a pretty laid back parent. There are a few things I insist that my daughter do (daily shower, tennis lessons), and other than that, most things are up to her. If she is doing something that doesn’t thrill me, for example she recently started playing video games, I’ll limit it, but I’m not strict about anything, typically.

I was from a free ranged childhood. I had a tv in my bedroom and was allowed to stay up all night since I was 12 and I skipped 88 days of school in grade 7. I turned out ok. School was just a place to go to give your parents a day off from parenting.. As long as I didn’t cause trouble I was free to do as I pleased. I got a high school diploma, (Which was all that was required of me). I even made it to a university and passed the first year of liberal arts. I was 6’5” and could b.s. my way into video arcades all day by saying that I was a college student. The moustache helped.

I grew up basically latch-key, and so were most of my friends. Once I hit 11 years old I was home without my parents after school. My sister was only 8 or 9. She hated it. Too young.

My parents didn’t put pressure on us to get good grades. We were basically trusted by our parents, and trustworthy. Overall, we were good kids.

My sister feels she was a little neglected and would have been better off with more structure and expectations. I think a little more structure regarding schoolwork might have been good for me, but what would have been even better for my learning is school starting at 9:30 instead of the crack of dawn. I’m dead serious. Also, too much pressure and I would have been very very miserable.

Overall, I much prefer having a parent who leans towards letting their kids have more freedom than being a hovering parent. Although, I think it’s extremely important the parent is available.

I think very strict parents with harsh punishment for children is a bad thing. So many of those kids go wild when out of the sight of their parents. But punishment is really a different topic than being a helicopter I guess.

I think childhood should be fun and time to absorb all the information possible. I think the biggest influence on how kids will turn out as adults is the example set by their parents. There are exceptions, but mostly that’s what I think.

Hooray for free-range-you and your free-range-wife! I’m often troubled when I watch overly-protective parents hover around their children, managing every situation and dictating every thought.

I have been lucky enough to have children and grandchildren who preferred the home surroundings so much, they weren’t interested in the so-called Free-Range”.

My concern is that free range advocates use that as an excuse to neglect their children.

My children are encouraged to be free range but they don’t seem very interested. The older one had a problem with a bully so didn’t like going out in the village. We used to go camping a lot and she had a lot of freedom on the campsites to play and make friends. The younger one is a nervous type so has to be encouraged to speak to people. It feels a long way away before she will be ready to go out by herself. So as a consequence I make her do things she wouldn’t do by herself. The older one is more independent now.

I like to think that I’m an adaptive sort of parent. I think a lot about what is best for them and try to balance my parenting towards what they need. This might be emptying the dishwasher or other chores as well as going places or having dancing lessons

I wish I could be more free range than I am. The neighborhood isn’t safe to let my kid wander. People drive like maniacs and the number of registered kiddie-fiddlers is way too high.

One of my kids lives 3,000 miles to the east of me and the other 3,000 to the west. Did I give them enough room to roam or did they need to go that far to escape my orbit? I don’t know, I don’t know…..

@Seek: “I wish I could be more free range than I am. The neighborhood isn’t safe to let my kid wander. People drive like maniacs and the number of registered kiddie-fiddlers is way too high.”

Good point. It’s certainly a luxury – one that I do not take for granted.