Do you ever avoid a particular place because of one bad experience?
Asked by
Mariah (
25883)
October 18th, 2016
I have to adjust my usual (walking) commute to the train station for the next month because the city is doing some construction. This morning I made my adjusted commute, which led me down a narrow pedestrian walkway between a concrete wall and a chainlink fence. I came upon a group of drunk dudes who got in my face, threw an empty bottle at me, and just generally scared the shit out of me. This evening I found a different route to take home. I’m not sure if I’m being ridiculous by avoiding the other route just because of what happened this morning. I know this kind of thing is how agoraphobia starts.
General stories from your life, or specific advice related to my situation, are both welcome.
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11 Answers
No, you are not being ridiculous. You would be ridiculous if you didn’t change your route. What if the bottle had hit you in the head? People in the kind of shape you described would just think you must like getting cat calls or you wouldn’t keep going by them and possibly be even more aggressive.
Keep safe Mariah!
I don’t see your decision as ridiculous. You may have been hurt. It’s just saving your own skin and avoiding danger. Nothing wrong with that.
I get that. I just wasn’t sure if it was silly to associate that particular place with rowdy drunk dudes. If I knew they were going to be there every morning then of course I’d avoid it. But, like, should I just avoid every location in the city where something bad has ever happened to me? I’m probably over thinking it lol.
Thanks guys.
Arbys and Burger King after I got sick. Never been back since.
I don’t think you’re over-thinking it. I would avoid the path.
Sure. I don’t make the same mistake twice.
I, personally, wouldn’t take the route with the drunk dudes ever again. There is nowhere to run, the way you described it.
The only time I’ve avoided a place was after I had this disastrous affair with this incredibly beautiful woman. Who was married. She was in her early thirties and owned a little antique shop, and I was about twenty. The shop was our rendezvous. She broke it off after a year and I thought I was going to die. It was the only time in my life I ever seriously thought about killing myself. I avoided passing that shop at all cost even long after she moved away with her husband. Everytime I saw the place I’d tear up and nearly lose it. I was extremely miserable for a long time.
I would avoid the route with the drunks, unless it usually is a route full of many pedestrians. If you’re fairly isolated on that path in general then I think you’re smart to avoid it.
I think you’re being smart, @Mariah. I do the same. If I had a bad experience, I might reconsider the location, the route, whatever. I also wouldn’t want to relive the experience mentally by being in the same place again.
Yes, and I continue to avoid it because the situation at that location remains the same.
I can’t remember changing my route because of an experience, but I don’t think you’re being ridiculous. Sounds like you are being very sensible to me.
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