Do you judge a person by their "hand shake? "(Details )

Do such things matter to you?

Absolutely!

It is one of those moments that transcends political correctness, ideology, and the general bullshit. It matters.

In some cases, yes. I met a distinguished professor and shook his hand. It was like a wet fish. His handshake was so weak and pathetic. I wondered “is he so disinterested in me?”, but he did the same to someone else. So I can only presume that’s how he shakes hands. It did affect how I viewed him.

I extended my hand to a different man to shake hands and he said “I don’t shake hands with women”. Damn right I judged the sexist pig for his behaviour. It was in a professional setting.

I’d also judge a man who tried to crush my hand or flip my hand over to show how dominant he is. Such behaviour is a demonstration of what a dick that person is.

Beyond these types of things, not so much.

My ex brother in law would respond to na extended hand by grabbing only the fingers, not interlocking the thumb interstice. Freaked me out and I never trusted him.

I am okay with differences in strength, but the hand shake has to be complete and engaged, even if not very strong.

Certainly not, I have every sympathy for sufferers of Parkinson’s & would never judge them.

I couldn’t care less.

@Mrgrimm888 – Can you identify trouble makers by handshake entering the venue?

My late uncle, an old school master salesman, taught me early in my life that when meeting another man, you clasp his hand with a firm grip and look him straight in the eyes—it’s a sign of respect. I never forgot that and since have always used another man’s grip as at least one measurement of his worth.

I’m in America. This applies to America.

I prefer not to shake hands, but in some situations it’s almost a must.

One situation is meeting someone in a business situation. Almost all men know how to shake hands well. Too many women suck at it. I don’t judge it, but its too bad the person’s parents, an aunt or uncle, someone, even a high school teacher, didn’t teach them an appropriate firm hand shake. How did they get to adulthood without someone telling you how to shake hands?

This is another skill I feel should be added to the Home Ec curriculum when they finally bring it back. It would be during the week of etiquette.

Edit: As I think about it, the last handshake I had was in Verizon store. A very busy horizon store. The salesperson extended his hand to shake, and I was pissed about it. I’m sure my handshake was weaker than usual in that instance.

The last time this same sort of situation happened to me was years ago at enterprise tent a car at an airport. I wrote a comment online to customer service.

I disagree…a handshake is a courtesy (if you are a true gentleman) given to someone you just met. You know jack squat about this person and that handshake is a litmus test that will tell you whether you are dealing with a mover and shaker and someone who is pleased to make your acquaintance or just an uninterested limp wristed shaker.

@Pachy understands the concept.

I judge a person by how they treat others. To do so over a handshake is silly.

I’m going to add, when I was a manager and interviewed people, a weak handshake was a negative. It was part of the first impression. I didn’t not hire someone because of it, but if I was in a business that shaking hand with clients was part of the job, no way I would have someone in my company who couldn’t shake hands well.

@zenvelo Ewww. Why? Why did he shake hands like that? Yuck. Did you ever ask him? Or, ask your sister? Was it your sister’s husband?

@imrainmaker . Sometimes, sure. If someone tries to hurt my hand,by squeezing as hard as they can they’re probably a dick,and feel the need to prove themselves. Insecurity can lead to fights.

Some mock me. They say things like “oh, so your the guy that’s gonna throw me out if I misbehave?” And then they give me a sarcastic hand shake.

Or if someone won’t look me in the eye ,I may suspect that they are on something, or trying to hide something.

Some offer a handshake to get close enough to sucker punch me,or pull a knife with their free hand.

Some offer it because they were thrown out a previous night,and they want to ensure me they’ll behave. Which isn’t smart because I usually don’t remember all the people I’ve tossed. When they bring it to my attention, obviously I will see them as a potential problem.

I’d say half or more of the men I remove try and shake hands once we’re outside. Some regret their behavior and want a form of forgiveness. Others see it as a small victory as they leave. Others are trying to regain my trust so I’ll let them back in to the venue. (Which never happens…)

Some try and shake my hand every time they walk by. Which makes me suspicious of them.

It’s an interesting thing, a hand shake…

@jonsblond, just for the record, I would never let a hand shake, eirher a firm or a limp one, be the sole criterion for how I judge a man. It merely gives a first impression.

^That’s the idea. That’s what the thread is about. First impressions. The hand shake is a variable in the first impression equation, not the answer.

Indeed though, as many have mentioned, it is important,and telling.

Of course not. That would be retarded.

@MrGrimm888 I agree wholeheartedly with you. First impressions are everything and to go back to the handshake…almost without fail I already know what I need or want to know about that person who I am about to shake their hand. I am referring to people I have not met before and usually have already had some sort of introduction to. By that moment when the handshake greeting has been initiated, just before our hands even touch I already know as much as I need or wanted to know about that person in terms of character, intent, trustworthiness, whether they are reliable, kind, empathetic.

Again…first impressions are everything and just think of anyone when you first met them and how you felt about them at that first moment you crossed paths what your first impression was.

There is a good book called Blink that did a ton of research on the incredible cognitive process that our brains are capable of and how in the blink of an eye we already know all we need to know pretty much in any situation. Some will call this intuition, gut feeling and here in the case of a handshake I call it first impressions. Almost always all 3 are telling and precise barometers for the moment we are in.

There are also so many other pieces of information that come with the act of that handshake…eye contact, strength of the handshake, vocal intonation, personal space that are all valuable non-verbal cues as to not only how you perceive that person but also how they perceive you.

It’s doesn’t leave a first impression for me. It means nothing to me. It’s not important.

(My opinion)

@jonsblond I completely respect your opinion. I own a business and whether it be a customer or a prospective new supplier…that first impression/handshake has influence on how I start to do business with them…women included. I have to do this day in and day out. Again first impressions are important, but I am a fair person and will always give anyone a chance to prove my first perception wrong.

Can’t I give an opinion without others debating what I have to say?

@jonsblond Not a great place to voice an opinion without being open to other opinions. BTW I believe you voiced your opinion to my comments….lets be fair about the moment. Happy New year.

I GA’d you @jonsblond . I also agree with @Cruiser too.

These interactions tell us a plethora of information about a person, before we even speak.

I also understand the ones here who don’t place value on it. That’s useful to the thread.

There was no intended “right” answer to this question.

I was just wondering about others, in regards to what role the introduction hand to hand interaction plays in their perception of the person they just met.

I voiced MY opinion without any influence. I answered the OP and no one else. If I disagree with someone specifically and want to engage you should know after 8 years I’m not afraid to call them out.

just tired of being told I’m wrong. I get that often here.