Social Question

JeSuisRickSpringfield's avatar

How attached are you to your name?

Asked by JeSuisRickSpringfield (8561points) January 31st, 2017

Does your name fit you really well, or does it not fit you at all? Or maybe it’s just so familiar that you couldn’t imagine having a different one regardless of how well it fits you? How would you feel if you had to change your name, never to be called by your old one again?

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32 Answers

kritiper's avatar

I hate my first name, always have. Like my parents didn’t put any thought into it.

Mimishu1995's avatar

Just something that people can recognize me. I have no special feeling for my name really.

Sneki95's avatar

I love my name. I love it a lot. .
When I was supposed to be named, the godfather wrote several names, and my parents had to pick one. Fortunately, they chose the only non cringy one in the bunch.
I love my name, it means “the woman of snow” (Snow White). As someone very enthusiastic about snow, winter, and the colour white, I find my name very fitting for me, and surely am glad to be given such an elegant name.
It’s not a usual name, not many girls here are named Snow White, which makes it standing out a bit among all those Mariyas, Mayas, Draganas and Militsas (those are everywhere). I’m far away from prettiest of them all and I don’t have seven dwarves, but I still like my name, and find it fitting. (I do have dark hair, though, that’s something)

I thought about making up another name for myself, but I’d never actually do it. Maybe I’d make up an pseudonym, but I’d definitely not change my name. Nomen ist omen, after all.
I think there is a lot in a name. A name should be meaningful, something that represents you. I surely see my name, and many other names I hear, to be very descriptive and have a lot of meaning attached to them.

Call_Me_Jay's avatar

What I like is that, as far as I know, I am the only person on Earth with my name.

I look for people professionally, given a name and a past address. I have some search tools better than Google, and I have not found another person with my name.

When I want to find a particular Patrick Murphy or Maria Gomez, that’s difficult. There are hundreds of each in my city alone. I may never find the right one. I make calls, I knock on doors, I talk to a lot of wrong Patricks and Marias.

Somebody looking for me? Yeah, you got the right guy, I’m me. What took you so long?

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

I like my name. However, because I live in Australia EVERYONE shortens it. I’m so used to this now I even introduce myself using the shortened version. My husband uses the shortened version although I have said that I like my name and I’d like him to use my full name and not just when he’s trying to suggest he’s telling me off (jokingly). If I put my initials on something at work, very often someone will say ‘who’s that?’ because they think of me in terms of the shortened version of my name (which starts with a different letter). Makes me a bit cranky – just in case you didn’t notice.

Cruiser's avatar

I am quite content with Cruiser but since that fateful day in 2007 when I chose the name Cruiser to tear across the nubile frontier of the internet, I have been torn between the commitment I made to Cruiser with a “C” or equal desire to be Cruiser with a “K”...I have not had a good nights sleep since making that commitment to Cruiser with a C. Therein lies an equal draw to simply take the name of Steve…or Mork.

Patty_Melt's avatar

Whatever. If they change my name to Fred, that’s fine, so long as my checks cash and I get all my mail okay.

flutherother's avatar

My first name is very common and my surname is very rare. I wouldn’t want to change my name to something meaningless to me.

Seek's avatar

I’m named after a song about murdering a hooker, and no one spells it right except @johnpowell.

I’ve never really liked it.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

@flutherother LOL. Like a mantra?

I like both my real life name and my Fluther name very much. My first name is an unusual noble title, my middle name is after someone whom I admire a lot, as did my father, and my last name is possibly the most common surname in the English speaking world. It’s a nice mix and describes my behaviour and personality quite well. But I must admit, I had to grow into it.

I wouldn’t change a thing.

ucme's avatar

Imagine answering this if your name was May Bond…

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

^^Or Apollonia McGillicuddy.

Pachy's avatar

As a kid I hated my name. Surrounded by Bobs, Johns, Jims, Joneses, Smiths, Andersons, my German Jewish name, sounded to my young insecure ears terribly ethnic and other-ish.

Once out in the world I pretty much got over that—there were so many other things to feel insecure about—but I have to admit even now I wince a little whenever I hear my name spoken aloud.

I mean, don’t YOU think Adolph Hiltzerman is a pretty heavy load for a kid to carry in Texas? ;-)

elbanditoroso's avatar

Which name? My legal name is long and official sounding. By nickname is short and what I used most of the time. And there’s a second nickname that was used mostly when I was a kid.

Example: (and this is NOT my real name)

Long name: Mattathias
Nickname 1: Matt (used most of the time)
Nickname 2: Matty (used when I was a kid and occasionally by my parents)

So I have three names that I answer to. Mostly out of habit. If someone wanted to start calling me by another name, sobeit.

thorninmud's avatar

I have been in the position of changing my name. The ordination process in Buddhism involves taking on a new name (I went through this about 7 years ago). This is done precisely because one’s name is such a powerful point of attachment, something around which one builds a kind of “brand” over time, and that brand becomes a source of concern and alienation. Taking on a new name is a way of divesting from that brand, so to speak.

The challenge, of course, then becomes not just transferring all of one’s attachments to this new name—not turning it, too, into a brand.

zenvelo's avatar

I generally like my name; not overwhelmingly so, though. My middle name is odd (my grandmother’s maiden name) and there are too many “R” sounds jammed in the middle when I use my first and last name. But I do like my name.

Unofficial_Member's avatar

Name is just name. They’re really just words. I don’t understand people that got angry/find it unacceptable when other people call their names in different variation. Like for example, someone named Steven can be pronounced as “Ste-ven” but in other culture/accent such a name can also be pronounced as “Ste-van”. I guess some people are too fanatic toward their own names. I, myself, have name that can be pronounced differently and I actually like how my name can be pronounced in more than one way (I could easily recognize those who pronounced my name in different/other way). I enjoy variation in name pronounciation and can easily learn to associate such variation to myself.

Pachy's avatar

Adolph Hiltzerman—not REALLY my name, but you knew that, right?

Mariah's avatar

I have an extraordinarily common name, Rachel. In high school I had one class that was literally one third Rachels. Also in high school I accidentally kind of trained myself to stop responding to my name because one of the really popular girls was named Rachel and whenever I heard it said it was usually aimed at her. So…..I just find my name kind of boring and not very fitting. I do find the nickname Rae kind of cute though (and even moreso Ray which I know is the male spelling but….idk it’s like a little ray of sunshine!!) but nobody calls me that and it’d be weird to ask people to start. Especially for my family since they called me that when I was very little but not since I’ve grown up.

elbanditoroso's avatar

@Mariah – for whatever it’s worth, I have always liked the name Rachel… too bad there were so many of them.

Hawaii_Jake's avatar

I like my name very much. I’m named after both grandfathers.

I have 3 children, and I took naming them very seriously. I like old family names and old names in general. Naming is important. It marks a person; it travels with them for a lifetime. It must have the right balance of strength and light. It must shine firmly.

I grew up in the South, so we all have 3 names: 2 given ones and then the family name.

Soubresaut's avatar

My name has always felt like it fits me.

My first name is one that has many different spelling variations—even when I meet someone with my name, we almost invariably spell it differently. (I run into people more often with my name now; they’re all younger than me.) My first name is spelled… I guess in a way that runs atypical to spelling conventions. Online forms used to (almost invariably) save it wrong—but they’re getting better. I used to be vehement about my spelling. Now I find it somewhat amusing to see what strangers do. (Not people I know, though—I still want them to spell my name correctly.) My first name also has at least 5 ways to shorten it into a nickname—5 that I go by or have gone by, anyway—and so I’m really good at responding to sounds that sound like pieces of my name.

My last name is unusual and sounds different than it’s spelled. I actually didn’t know this for years, and by the time I found out about the mispronunciation plight experienced by my paternal side of the family, I didn’t really care. I think I was also so burned out by fixing the spelling of my first name for so long.

My middle name is pretty and it stands alone well—my parents wanted to make it a back up, in case I wound up not liking my first name. As I was getting ready to go to college, I planned on using my middle name just for a change, but I didn’t wind up doing it; I grew up around many people who went by names that were different from their legal first name, and so I’d seen how many times they had to correct people in a school setting, where procedural stuff goes by the name on the registrar—and I didn’t want to be the person who first corrected the spelling of my first name, then corrected the pronunciation of my last name, and then told them “but I go by the name in the middle anyway.” (I’ve since realized that most people mispronounce my middle name the first time they read it, too, so that would have been yet another step in the process.)

All of that said (sorry for so much!) I am rather fond of my name, but I think I’d be fine with changing it… I’d want to be able to pick what I’d be called instead, or at least have veto powers—I’d want to like hearing the new name all the time.

PS: my first, middle, and last names are either all forenames or all surnames. I think that’s kind of fun.

tinyfaery's avatar

When I was growing up very few people had my name, but now, I hear it all the time. I guess my name fits me. I’ve never not liked it, but I usually do not give it much thought.

ragingloli's avatar

Names are for friends, so I do not need one.

Pachy's avatar

@Mariah… and further for what it’s worth, I agree wholeheartedly with @elbanditoroso. I’ve always loved the name Rachel. To me, there’s absolutely NOTHING common about it. Just goes to show how others see us very differently from how we see ourselves.

cinnamonk's avatar

I like my name. Attached to it? I guess, it’s the only name I’ve ever been called and I have no nicknames.

I know only one other Rachel, @Mariah, so I wouldn’t say it’s extraordinarily common. On the other hand, I have known many people with the same name as me, though they usually have an “h” at the end.

Coloma's avatar

I like my name alright, but wouldn’t say I am attached to it. It’s my name, for better or for worse. haha

marinelife's avatar

I like my first name, but then I chose it. When I was in my 40s, I had it legally changed. I know that it fits me much better than the name I was given at birth, which was a compromise for my parents, one of whom wanted to name me Sandra and the other one Gwendolyn.

Pachy's avatar

@Coloma, I say for better.

Mariah's avatar

@AnonymousAccount8 Sometimes I wonder if maybe it was mostly my local area where Rachel ran so rampant. It was a religious area, and I know that at least one of the Rachels in high school was named so for that reason. In college I didn’t know so many Rachels, and at both of my workplaces since college I’ve been the only Rachel. I think I got my name at just the very start of it being a popular name, so it’s mostly people my age and younger who have it. My mom says Rachel was not a common name yet at the time of my birth.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

Names wax and wane. My daughter’s name was not popular when I chose it, but I was talking to a salesperson who has the same name the other day and she said there were four other girls with her name in her class at school. For the record, I think Rachel is a pretty name and I considered naming my second child Rachel. Then I heard a song with a different name and went with that.

My father chose my name. When I was a child he would steadfastly insist that people did not shorten my name. He named me xxx and that’s what he wanted people to call me. As a teenager I hated his insistence my friends use my full name. I think I almost defiantly chose to use the shortened version. However, now, as I said above, I really like my full name. It’s my name.

I should say too, I had to legally change my name to my own name. After my first marriage disintegrated I wanted to return to my maiden name, but despite having all the paperwork that showed I really was originally xxx xxx xxx, I had to legally change my name to my maiden name. So I chose and paid for this name. So yes, I’m attached to it.

Espiritus_Corvus's avatar

@Mariah I also agree with @elbanditoroso, @Pachy and others here concerning your given name, Rachel. I spent my formative years in the South and went to Catholic schools. There were not many Rachels in those environments and it has always seemed a beautiful, exotic name to me.

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