I know that logically you get away from a toxic person, but is it possible that some women are just too powerful to resist?

No. It is the obsessed person that is giving away their power.
Nobody has the “power” to control you unless you allow it.

Nope, women are not “just too powerful to resist” – some men are too insecure to set appropriate boundaries. The result is dysfunction..

Is this more fantasizing about the married jogger mom? Or more wishing you could get back with the ex wife who treated you like dirt?

You need a hobby or an activity. Go find a meet up group with single men and women with a interest in something you like to do.

@zenvelo it’s more about the ex again.
I just want to have make up sex with her without actually having to be back in that relationship.
She just really tastes good and smells good and I lose it.
She’s a force of nature and it’s kinda like people who chase storms because they’re so beautiful to look at but the the tornado turns on you and leaves you dead in a field somewhere.
My ex wife is my tornado.

Ah! What a poetic view on the perils around resisting the “call of the siren”. It’s the timeless struggle with desire wrestling your good sense. I have a great deal of jealous admiration for those capable of satiating their requirements for such people and somehow avoiding the fangs. But there really are experts. Train yourself. Develop the discipline to recognize the line and never cross it.

I know I am.

“but is it possible that some women are just too powerful to resist?”

No.

It may be hard to believe, but you actually do have more self-control than a dog, the only question is whether or not you choose to exercise it.

It sounds like you have a pheromone problem. The sense of smell is a powerful force in our lives.

@Patty_Melt I do love pheromones, but I never knew it could be a problem.
That’s interesting.
I wonder what causes that over reaction to the smell of a woman.
I thought it was just natural to kiss her neck and nuzzle my face in her hair and bite her earlobes and kiss her whole face and kiss and lick everywhere else on her body.
Now that I think about it maybe I am addicted to women’s pheromones.
Even when I see the woman jogging I think about how good she must smell.
Hmm…Maybe I am a dog or something?

With the taste of your lips i’m on a ride…;-}

You are obsessed with this woman. Seriously, I think you should consider talking with a therapist to try to find out why you can’t get past this. You have already told us that this woman cheated on you and treated you very badly. She doesn’t care about you. Please don’t use sex as payback, or simply to satisfy your horniness. Get a grip man!

This woman, although she is a terrible match for you, is still the mother of your child. Have some respect for your child, for her, and some self respect for yourself.

Get yourself some help, maybe with a divorced men’s group, a therapist or whatever. Take some time to get yourself together. Don’t even consider dating anyone new right now, either. In my opinion, any poor woman who comes into your sphere is going to have to compete with the ghost of your ex wife, or else, you will be so desperate, that you will cling onto anyone new, even if they aren’t the right person either.

Your most important job right now is that of a father. How do you think all of this obsessiveness would look to him? Is this the way you want your son to behave around women when he grows up?

I feel bad for you, but you are creating your own drama.

I know.
I’m gonna ramble on if you don’t mind.
Sometimes I don’t know if idealistic relationships exist?
Like if my ex wife was in front of me and I kiss her well, that’s about as real as it gets, but what she does behind my back is out of my control and out of my sight and mind.
I got to a weird place at one point where I told myself that I only care how someone treat’s me when they’re with me otherwise I don’t give a shit what they do when they are away.
I think either that is a sad defense mechanism that I created to cope with the fact that I knew I was being cheated on or it’s fucking genius and more realistic than thinking that I will ever find a partner that’s faithful.
I am totally confused about people and the scary thing is I don’t really think anyone honestly has relationships and love figured out.
People cheat A LOT of people cheat, but I didn’t.
I’m also delusional though, I think movie love is how real life should be and I get mad at the world when it doesn’t work like the movies (True love, happily ever after, totally devoted to each other kinda stuff) and in reality maybe I’m the fucked up one who tries to hard and doesn’t cheat and would die for my wife and it’s all in my head.
It doesn’t exist like that for her or anyone else and anyone who think’s they know about life and that they have a good marriage just hasn’t been fucked over YET or has no idea of the cheating that’s happening to them.
My marriage has left me confused with major trust issues and I just think I’m having a bad day.
Maybe if I get a different job and meet new people I can find someone special???
Marriage on the other hand I don’t even know what to say about that anymore.
I was warned by people not to get married, but I just thought they were bitter assholes.
Anyway I’m trying, but having a kid together makes it impossible to get away from her, she’s texting me as I type this.
I know she’s bad news and I also know that she is human and has some good qualities like everyone.
Yes, I want to sleep with her, but will I?
I don’t know, but if she comes onto me I can’t help it because I am addicted to her body.
I need space from her so bad.

No,ideal relationships do not exist. “Movie love/relationships” are certainly not reality. Maybe you do need to take a break from your ex. I know you have a child together, but perhaps a small break would help everyone all around. Your child is going to get confused with all that you have going on here. They are going to grow up not having a clue how to interact with the opposite sex.
And yes….please get some professional help.

My ex wife didn’t respect me.
My son may have some issues from watching me struggle with this relationship or he may grow up with a greater understanding than most.
I try to never lie to my son and sometimes I think that him seeing the truth about his mother and father’s marriage is just that the truth.
I’m the one who grew up with a distorted view.
I thought women were absolutely perfect creatures totally innocent, caring, loving reliable, honest and beautiful.
I went into my relationship with that mindset and ended up the mess you see today.
I just tell him that he should learn from our relationship and try to find a partner that he can communicate well with, who will compromise and who is good to him and not to just chase after the prettiest girls like I did because unfortunately some of those one’s are used to attention and getting their way and also every other guy is chasing after those same pretty girls.
I just want him to look at a woman’s character, personality, heart etc. before their beauty and really get to know them first and become friends and see how honest and loyal they are and what they’re like when they drink and what their views are about relationships and marriage.
I want him to be smarter than me if he’s going to get married.
I don’t want him to feel the pain and humiliation I have from this relationship.
I also tell him that I was meant to be with his mom so we could make him and that he’s the best thing that ever happened to us.
He knows the thing’s his mom did and why I can’t be with her and I also told him that it’s ok if he loves his mom too.
He’s very smart and he get’s everything and I think it will show him the reality of relationships and that he should be somewhat cautious because it can really hurt if your head is always in the clouds like your dad’s was.
I just want him to be truely happy and to have the respect in his relationships that I never had.