Has your body ever done something you thought was odd?

I have to pee every 15 minutes.

I would check that out with a doctor. It is potentially serious.

Fibromyalgia, ectopic pregnancy, sensitivity to sunlight.

Sorry.. And this is pretty gross and involves masturbation. Scroll down fast if you don’t want the horrible details.

When I was fifteen I was rearranging my bedroom. I was living in the attic above the garage in my sisters house. So there were all these little nooks and the ceiling was was sloped.

——- AGAIN.. Stop reading if you are squeamish——-

So I was trying to shoehorn my mattress into this little nook and I did something wrong. I thought I just pulled my groin again. I had done that a few months before when I was snowboarding.

——- AGAIN.. Stop reading if you are squeamish——-

So I was in a fair amount of pain and thought nothing of it. I went to bed and wasn’t worried.

——- AGAIN.. Stop reading if you are squeamish——-

I was fifteen and getting ready for school. So clearly I masturbated in the shower. And lets just say there was a Jackson Pollock finish except it was blood… So much blood. A good half a cup.

I never went to the doctor for this. But there was blood in my urine too for a few days.

You were warned.

For nearly all my life I had a skipping heartbeat, that would only beat normally during exercise. During rest my heart would beat 29 times a minute. That really freaked out nurses when I was giving blood. They all looked at me in amazement, and asked if I exercised a lot.

@JP, I’m so confused as to what you did – you were moving a mattress or you were masturbating or you were moving a mattress while masturbating or perhaps you were trying to use one of those nooks and crannies while masturbating…??? Regardless, you did yourself an injury which led to bleeding in the shower! I’m glad it (whatever the hell ‘it’ is) has healed.

A couple weeks ago I woke up and as I got out of bed (about 3:30 a.m.), both my arms and my right leg were tingling with that pins and needles sensation you get when you lay on your arm and it goes to sleep and then tingles when it starts to wake up. I didn’t think anything about it except the sensation didn’t go away until about 1:30 in the afternoon. Yes, mentioned it to the doctor and he said talk like that bought me an MRI. Just waiting to do that.

@seawulf575 Always best to get these things checked out. I hope all is well. Keep us posted.

@seawulf575, I am wishing the best outcome for you. It sounds serious. I hope it isn’t. I am glad you took quick action and spoke with your doctor.

I’ll just start with the least weird things and slowly escalate as my answer continues.

- I sneeze in the sun. I thought everybody did until my ex accused me of making it up. Then I learned that only about 17% of people do.

- One day I was feeling fine but when I peed my piss looked like Pepsi. Went to the ER. It was old blood. That’s how I found out about my first kidney stone! It didn’t start hurting until after that.

- I’ve passed a few stones, some too big to pass naturally which were pulverized, some that were very small and didn’t disrupt my life too much. Just one that was in the sweet spot of small enough to pass on my own but big enough to cause major pain. I still very fondly remember the moment that it exited my ureter. The ureter gets more and more narrow as it approaches the bladder, so the most painful part is right before the very end of the process. At this point, I guess the stone was so tightly wedged in there that it was blocking the fluid flow because I distinctly remember this moment when I felt a little pop! and suddenly this wave of piss flowed into my bladder. And the pain was just gone. It was the weirdest goddamn feeling.

- Sometimes my farts come out of my vagina. This is because I have a chronic rectovaginal fistula. I’ve had it for 5 years and it will probably never heal. I basically don’t care about it anymore, but it was a pretty big “oh shit” moment the first time it happened as you might imagine. It doesn’t cause me any problems, but I have the occasional vaginafart.

After my prostate biopsy my ejaculate looked like black tar – like something from Aliens.

This is normal after a prostate biopsy. But it sure looks scary!

I occasionally experience a weird sensation throughout my nervous system. It starts in my spine and then radiates outward almost in waves. It is like a shock.

I have finally decided that it is my body reliving the impact of a fall from a deck 20 feet onto concrete when I was an infant. It cracked my skull. I had no words.

I once thought about voting for Nixon.

(OK, it was only for ten seconds, but still….)

@johnpowell That story wasn’t nearly as disgusting as billed. I am somewhat disappointed, and want my money back.

(What ??.....I wasn’t charged ??......I’m sorry, never mind….).

A few years ago I was given an awful test where they stuck a needle in my arm and pumped electricity into my muscle. Gawd it was awful. It was like the thing they did in the Right Stuff movie, but slightly less intense. To this day, that muscle will start dancing for no reason occasionally. I mean, you can see it squirm and jump, and my arm is totally still.

When I eat cheddar cheese the back of my throat gets tingly (not an allergy, just a weird sensation that comes only when eating straight cheddar cheese).

The back of my neck gets the “chills” feeling whenever I have a haircut.

I’ve gone blind in my right eye twice. Each episode lasted for about twenty minutes, then my sight slowly came back. I was diagnosed with ocular migraines. I get several visual disturbances every month but the blindness is what really scared me.

I lived through 12 years of atrial fibrillation and other heart arhythmias, two episodes of pulmonary embolism (PE) and congestive heart failure. I’m now taking no medications, my heart is beating strong as an ox and I’m competing in world class canoe competitions (in my age group).

My last cardiologist told me to call him if I ever need a heart doctor in the future. My family practice doctor is totally confused. I tried to explain to him how I came back so strong. It’s a long and convoluted story so he just let it go.

Man, I had to read through all of this before I came up with something. @jonsblond prompted this memory.

I was a stay at home Mom. One day while I was doing the dishes, or whatever, my vision started closing in on me. It just kept closing in, getting darker and darker. I thought I was going blind.
I went into the playroom where my babies were playing and sat on a chair and just watched them. I memorized their beautiful faces, how they were sitting, everything I could. I figured if I was going blind I wanted my last memory to be of my children.
I also kind of dispassionately realized there were bright, flashing, neon geometrical shapes in the dark areas around my eyes. They were all primary colors, and they were strict triangles and rectangles and things like that. Hard and straight lined.
Just as it started to close completely it paused, and then slowly faded back until I could see normally again.
Strangest damn thing that has ever happened to me. I asked the doc about it the next time I was in and he asked if I had a migraine afterward. I said “No.” He said that is the kind of thing that usually precedes a migraine, so I don’t know what the hell it was.

When I was athletic my body surprised me sometimes with the things it was capable of doing that I didn’t think it could.

Getting pregnant and producing babies.

That IS quite amazing, isn’t it. Sort of freaky if you dwell on it when you’re pregnant!

Yes, thanks to my horrible Implanon birth control, I’ve had a heavy period for more than two months with no signs of slowing down. Thankfully, I finally said “enough is enough” have a doctor appt. to have it removed next week. CAN’T WAIT.

Many times.

I’ve had several minute trance like states. I’d stand up, loose consciousness for a split second, and when I come to my sences, I have no clear memory of anything before that. Like I entered the room for the very first time, even if it’s my own house. A very weird micro amnesia.

There’s another one, when I was a kid. Just when I was about to fall asleep, I’d feel like my body has started to rise up and float above the bed. I’d open my eyes and feel like I’d been thrown on the bed, and my heart would beat loudly. I’ve lost that ability now.

Besides that, my muscles, all over the body, often “dance” like described above too, and I also sneeze for no reason all the time. Sometimes, I suddenly get super cold and start shivering for a second and then it stops.

Once, I was lying on my bed, looking at the phone. When I got up, I couldn’t see through my left eye at all for a few minutes. I was lying on the left side, though.

Oh, and I peed green once. Felt like an alien.

Not the body this time, but the mind, I think. I’m thinking of something and go to act on it. Walk through a door and forget what I was doing. Walk back through the door and remember and then complete the journey. In the worst cases, I blank out again the second time through the door. This never happened until I had kids, so I think it has something to do with them. I term it “Acute Parental Senility”.

When we walk into a kitchen and forget why we went there, why do we think looking in the fridge will help us remember?

@Sneki2 Your “trances” are reminiscent of how some of my epileptic friends describe their seizures. Might be good to track them and mention to your doctor.

A couple of times a year since I was a kid I’ve been able to only see half of everything. The left side of the visual field is clear, normal, and the right is dark and full of floaters. It lasts about a half hour to an hour and is followed by a headache that lasts about an hour. I had an MRI about 25 years ago that showed nothing. The only things I can’t do well when these occur is read and drive. I just pull over, close my eyes and wait for it to clear. It’s a minor inconvenience.

@Espiritus_Corvus Look up “Ocular Migraine”.