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aeterna's avatar

A friend slept with someone elses boyfriend. the girlfriend confronts my friend via email asking what happened between her and her boyfriend? should my friend reply or ignore the girl?

Asked by aeterna (66points) August 12th, 2008

like is it really up to my friend to explain to the girlfriend what happened or shouldnt the boyfriend do that?

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17 Answers

jlm11f's avatar

friend should tell girl that she slept with her boyfriend. if friend was able to be a slut and sleep with him, she should also be able to take the responsibility of said sleeping and own up. if she is too chicken to face her, then she should have thought about that pre-sleeping incident. plus, email should make the telling her part easier. expect bf to be mad at friend for telling. then hopefully gf can ditch the bf.

Randy's avatar

BINGO! Took the words right outta my mouth. Ive realized that some people will never get it.

Rickisgirl's avatar

I think she should own up to what she’s done and tell the girl she slept with her boyfriend. She should also apologize!

It could be that the girl wants to hear your friend’s version of the events, as he (the boyfriend) may have lied to her. Your friend needs to do the right thing so this girl can see what a dog her boyfriend is. Isn’t that what your friend would want if the tables were turned and she was the one who was cheated on?

wundayatta's avatar

GF should have asked BF, not friend, unless GF is friends with friend. Friend owes GF nothing (again, unless friends with GF). What if friend actually didn’t sleep with BF, but is merely being accused of it by insecure GF? Naw. GF made a mistake even asking. Big mistake. Shouldn’t expect to get a truthful answer.

I think the other advice you’ve been getting is wishful thinking, and totally unrealistic. No one goes around announcing who they slept with to strangers. It’s just silly. Unless times are so different now, and people brag. If that’s the case, then people are mean, and everyone deserves what they get. Yuck! Whatever happened to privacy?

tinyfaery's avatar

Did your friend know this guy had a girlfriend? If so, then she has to accept the consequences, and own up to her actions. She is under no obligation to tell the girlfriend, but she should not be shocked about being confronted. If she didn’t know, then the problem is not her’s, it’s the guys. I’ve never understood why women take out their anger on the woman in these scenarios. It’s ultimately the fault of the guy in the relationship, not the girl he cheated with

aeterna's avatar

@everyone, i told her to confront the girl. things seem to be okay. thank you.

jlm11f's avatar

@tiny – i think the guy is a lot more to blame than the asker’s friend. but the Q was about the friend (as opposed to the bf) which is why i discussed her. Also, I did assume that the friend knew the boy had a gf. if she did not, then the case is totally different of course. but that’s what i was let on to believe. and using that assumption, even though guy is a jerk, the girl knowing he has a gf, is no saint either.

tinyfaery's avatar

@PnL I agree, if the girl who he cheated with knew the guy had a girlfriend, both parties are culpable. Is all of this his girlfriend, my best friend, her boyfriend stuff confusing you too?

jlm11f's avatar

@tiny – you won’t believe how many more complicated stories i get to hear thanks to my full of drama friends…this was actually easy to understand. though i admit that the way i wrote my answer was in part making fun of the bf/gf/bff situation. but only in part

ninjaxmarc's avatar

in either case sounds like drama.

mzgator's avatar

If you are “big and bad” enough to do something so sleezy and hateful to a friend, you need to be “big and bad” enough to take your medicine. There are plenty enough guys to sleep with other than your friends boyfriend.

Carla's avatar

I’m assuming that since the GF has the Friends email address, they know each other. As others have said she needs to own up to her actions. I would also question what kind of friend she really is.

flameboi's avatar

reply, say “it just happened, I’m sorry”

scamp's avatar

I agree with the others. She needs to own up to what she did, and apologize. She needs to think about how she would feel if the shoe was on the other foot.

Knotmyday's avatar

My friend teamed up with someone else’s boyfriend, and they stole two hundred bucks from his girlfriend. The girlfriend found out, and sent an email to my friend asking what happened to her money. Should my friend talk to her, or ignore her and go buy a pair of shoes?

scamp's avatar

If she buys shoes, karma will see to it that she gets some awkward heels and she will probably break her ankle! Good one Knotmyday!!

areyoukiddingme's avatar

i really dont have an answer but..my friend slept with this guy knowing he has a girlfriend and she still trying to sleep with him..and the guy is all like oh i dnt want to break up with my gf then he doesnt want to break up with her..basically my friend is going for what ever he says..karma is a ish and it will bite her..she says she take the gf feelings into consideration but thats a lie all she thinking bout is the sex..

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