I tell you a little story.
I teach models and actors how to present for camera. I don’t teach acting. I teach presence, how (and when) to project confidence, sadness, strength, humility, etc… for the camera. I’ve taught this for forty years, and one night, it saved my life.
I was alone, late at night, in a bad part of town, fueling my car at a gas station. Looking around, I noticed a herd of young men slowly approaching me. There were at least ten of them, and they walked lurching as if stalking prey. They came from multiple directions. I was surrounded, and they were closing in with the look of death in their eyes. I was about to get jacked hard.
First, show no fear. Become fearsomely fearless. Throw a chagrin at the crowd and do a little disco dance, as if I’m the happiest man alive.
Second, scan for the leader. He’s the one somewhere in the middle rear, nicer dressed than the others, shorter, older, and the others will be glancing over to him. He only looks at me. Very easy to identify. I make eye contact and never let go, throwing a big smile at his face.
In the midst of their approach, I stopped fueling and walked straight up to the leader saying grandiosely, “WHAT’S UP Oh My God How You Doin’ Man!!!... I didn’t know you guys would be down here tonight! Fucking awesome dude… How are you??? Killin’ it for sure”. Walking straight through the crowd until I was standing side by side the leader.
Understand what happened in that moment. The boys, all of them, immediately thought that I knew their main man. It was like turning off ten robots simultaneously. They were so let down that they dissolved, dispersed, and left me standing alone with the dude… Who, had a completely perplexed look on his face… half trying to figure out where, and why, his boys diluted to… and also searching the farthest reaches of his mind trying to figure out if he did, in fact, know me. He had to know me. We must have been good friends. Only a known good friend would approach him with such joy and confidence at our reunion.
It’s brain science. I literally pinged the files in his brain that recognized how a good friend in his best moment would approach him. He (as we all do) had reference files in his head that couldn’t help but kick in and force him to BELIEVE that we were old chums. We’d probably committed some wicked crime together in the past…
He understood, there was absolutely no way for him to call out to the others and say “Hey come back. Let’s get this guy”. It was over. And he respected that. He respected the play I had just put on him. And as I walked away, getting into my car, he gave me the biggest smile and nodded his head.
Walk like a smiling giant and rule the world my friends.