What do you want Fluther to be?

Lordy, I am dull. I want Fluther to be still here. I get modded probably about an average amount, and I am not so arrogant as to think I am entitled to have my deathless prose enshrined here. I like the set-up. I like that it’s a moderated site so it’s still (most of the time anyway) civil. I have been on more heavily moderated sites, which is really not a problem for me, as I don’t take my participation on these sites too seriously, and I have been places with little to no moderation…for about 5 minutes.

In spite of those calling for blood because they are not being obeyed in their wishes, I find it to be balanced here. I have made friends in real life because of Fluther, and more that I will likely never meet in person, but still care deeply for.

I would like there to be more mods so the workload wouldn’t be so hard, but it’s such a horrid job that I can’t imagine doing it without ripping my hair out.

This is someone else’s house, and they allow me to come visit. I don’t believe We should have any say in the governance. They don’t owe us anything.

Because I am on my way out the door to do errands, I will give my short answer, and then come back later.

I wish it were more like it was when I joined in 2010. Auggie was a paid lead Moderator. She was, and always will be the person I look to, to see that things are not only done fairly, but compassionately.

I quite like it as it is. It has been an effective question and answer site for me and I have had many very helpful responses. I have also been able to express my views on a wide range of subjects and get feedback from people whose opinions I respect. I feel I know a few people on this site quite well but I have interacted with no one outside Fluther itself.

The moderation defines Fluther and ensures standards are maintained which is a thankless task at times but it is necessary. I don’t see any need to change the rules; they apply equally to everyone, they are fair and I believe they are fairly applied.

When they result in someone being banned however, I think that person should be given a second chance. We can’t afford to lose contributors especially the regular ones who we know as a kind of online acquaintances or friends.

I wish people would remember that even when Auggie was moderator, there were complaints about the moderation. I can’t remember a time there haven’t been complaints, and while I’ve had some gaps along the way, I’ve been here since 2009. Someone’s always unhappy, and sometimes that “someone” is going to be you.

Speaking of Auggie, I wish people would remember that back when she was a moderator, she would remind us take the explanations from users who have been suspended or banned, or users who think they know what’s going on because of word of mouth, with a grain of salt.

I wish people would stop assuming that they would do things differently and somehow inherently better than the people who are in the position to know more about what’s going on, and who have been tasked with making difficult calls based on that knowledge.

I wish people would remember that the ban that’s caught everyone’s attention was made after several second chances. It didn’t come out of nowhere.

And I wish people would realize that the mods were operating discreetly and respectfully when they didn’t suddenly broadcast it had happened, or lay out a laundry list of the reasons for all to see. As normal users of the site, it’s neither our job nor our burden to wade through that information.

I want to thank our mods for everything they do. They were well-respected members long before they became mods. They didn’t suddenly change just because they were given the mod cloak. I value the work they do for this community.

I hope that answers the question.

As a site, how about what we have now.

I would like to get paid. Other than that I’m happy now. It is good practice here for when I finally get the motivation to start my own YouTube channel. I think that there is enough demand to start a free/ or paid clinic.

I have the site I want for the most part elsewhere.

Fluther has been the place I’ve come to get away from the political hurly-burly elsewhere. I love the hurly-burly most of the time but sometimes the quiet, somewhat stagnant, tidal pool here is a nice respite.

It certainly isn’t a true q and a site. Perhaps it was at the beginning but it seems pretty much a social hang-out now, with a q and a cover story.

I like the somewhat fussy attention to grammar/spelling. The formatting is a bit old-school but not too annoyingly so.

I like that moderated posts are noted. It shows that work is being done by mods. I’d like to believe that modded posts are used only to remove spam and the like, but I understand it has evolved to include much more (that I personally think is not their place).

I do NOT like that moderators speak to members (by pm) about other members. I found it very disturbing to see the evidence of that on FB the other day. On the site I mod/admin at, that would be enough to get the moderator removed. The knowledge (and evidence I discovered) that moderators can and do read pm’s is also disturbing. For all the impression of this being an antimicassar of a site, respect and privacy are not as valued as I’d hoped and expected.

So what do I want? I want the moderators to moderate spam, leave discussion alone.
I want them to respect all of their members, to treat them as equals, to fully respect all members’ privacy.

I want members to grab hold of an opportunity to hang on to a nice, quiet site. Ask questions, provide answers, discuss things, deal with disagreements as adults on their own – without complaining to moderators. Strong opinions, strongly worded should be given the same respect as all others. Disagreements should not be feared/avoided.

Don’t look for things to complain about. Respect each other. Count to 10.

On days you’re feeling emotionally delicate, don’t go on-line.

I have no problem with the way it is, currently. As I’ve pointed out before. I don’t need every debate to turn into a verbal blood bath of name calling. I think people can still make a their point without getting nasty and making things personal. It’s why I don’t really want it to become about social interaction and why I don’t give my personal information. I think PM allows for some personal interaction without it becoming a place of US against Them.

If I could change one thing. I would would like a vote to come up about whether someone should be dismissed from Fluther before it happening. Maybe like a small Fluther court that the Administrators pick and the offenses are laid out, and how many times they have been warned. First two warning are PM messages and instruction of the rules they broke. The 3rd a mentor is applied. Someone who may have their same views but not the need to be nasty to make their point. If that doesn’t work.then a small court of peers. The reason is because the person may have been attacked first in the thread and the person gets to explain how and why they felt they were defending themselves. If found innocent they get one last chance. After that, they get booted.

We all have our biases even if we think we don’t . And I have seen some good people booted who mean well but may be over zealous in their defense, Sometimes they aren’t even defending themselves but someone else. Yes it’s just easier to report them to the mods then not have a knee jerk reaction, but we all have those days where we just want to knock a bully. It’s human nature and although not the best way to react; it just a harder on some days not to react.

Along with those initial warnings there could be a list made of suggestions for how to handle difficult situations and maybe a list of reminders for people to remember when writing.

I have on occasion offended people without giving thought that someone on here may have a situation that I object too and they find offensive. And there will be people on here who make no apologies for their beliefs that I find offensive.

Say someone who believes that religion is for idiots, fools and for those looking to use their faith to take advantage of people. No doubt there are idiots in fools and those who take advantage that call themselves religious as there are in those who do not believe. I can take the hit but I use to fight it a lot. But it took time for me to realize that sometimes those making those comments come from a hurt past and someones belief or being in a religion is how they feel they were hurt.

There are people who are either young or old, who need guidance in how to get their point across without kicking their demons onto someone else.

It was with the help of some people on fluther, who would sometimes clue me into someones pain, that made me see how jotting down an angry response to someone with personal issues (that I wasn’t aware of) solves nothing. But it shouldn’t mean they get away with being a douche, no matter their issue. I can still rate their response as unhelpful, and needs to be reviewed. We can’t control every aspect of other peoples behavior but we can always choose how we will respond. As an adult, or as a douche.

But one thing remains clear. I didn’t create Fluther. Fluther is not mine to change. So I will go with what the creators are doing for now. It’s still pretty good.

Honestly, I come here to socialize, debate, and occasionally get answers for questions. If we became a soulless quora I would leave because it wouldn’t be fun for me anymore.

I like knowing the users here. And I like to be known. That’s the draw.

I like being able to pop into a social question like “how are you really” and say I’m in the ER again and get support. I like that I don’t have to type out ten paragraphs of backstory because people already know it.

I like to hear others’ personal news and understand the progress it represents to them because I know their backstory.

I like to bounce thoughts and ideas about my personal life off of people whose judgment I already know to be good, in a place where I feel safe because nobody from real life is here and if a troll shows up they’ll get modded.

I think this place is fine as it is except for the occasional petty and shitty behavior. I think some of us have way too much history with each other and things come to a head sometimes. That’s okay as long as we can get through it and keep coexisting relatively peacefully.

I would be sad, but not broken, to see this website go. It’s kinda special. It’s a rare type of internet community.

I really like it the way it is. Pleasing all of the people, all of the time is impossible. Perfection is unachievable. For what it is, this site is great…

If I didn’t have tentacles, I’d give it two thumbs up:)

This is a good Q, @Hawaii_Jake, thank you.

I’d like each lurve mansion to be converted to a Fluther Palace Of Pancakes, and drive those greedy merchants of mediocrity, IHOP out of business! ;-p

I’m going to sell all my lurve, so that I can build an FPOP down here in LA, CA. ;-D

Will nekkid pancakes be on the menu?