Sister doesn't seem to care much if I may not make it to her wedding?

Wait for her to finalize the date before you get upset. Maybe it won’t be when you’re thinking it will be.

She said “IF it’s on Labor Day weekend.” That means she’s not sure when it will be.

I’d wait and see also.

Maybe she felt like she was letting you off the hook. That she didn’t want you to feel any guilt if you chose to go to the other wedding, and she didn’t stop to think it might hurt your feelings.

My guess is your parents will tell her not to do it the same date if she doesn’t figure it out on her own.

I also guess that she and her fiancé don’t care if some people can’t make it, because they know that’s a huge risk when it’s a destination wedding anyway. Maybe she looks at it more like an elopement?

A friend of mine just got married suddenly, and the son she is closest with couldn’t make it, and I’m shocked she did when he was unable to attend. She said she could never come up with a date that satisfied everyone, so she stopped trying. Still, it’s shocking to me. They just got married at the courthouse with her one son present and I don’t know who else. It was last minute decided a few days before it was done.

I would want to be at my sister’s wedding, but as long as it didn’t upset her if I didn’t go I wouldn’t be very worried.

I really hope she doesn’t choose the same weekend. I think she should be considerate of the dates.

She might be putting out feelers, just to see who would be willing to miss her wedding.

Lots of people are doing planned elopements these days. It is much less expensive, and still quite nice.

I would suggest a heart to heart talk, just the two of you, to find out what are her true wishes.

Let her know that you are hurt by your conflicted feelings.

Well, it is a year from now so I guess there’s no point in worrying about it until then because anything can happen. If I had to, my bf and I would go our separate ways and attend each sister’s wedding separately although I would be sad I missed out on his sister’s.

Have you made it clear that you would choose to attend her wedding without your bf instead of his sister’s? Maybe she thought you meant you would go to your bf’s sister’s wedding instead and was upset so lashing out back to you to make you feel bad. Let her know you would definitely go to her wedding first and foremost, and ask her to keep you updated as early as possible so you can let your bf’s sister know you can no longer come if you need to.

Maybe it just isn’t that big of a deal to her. Or maybe she was just wanting to reassure you so you won’t feel bad. It’s better than her getting all upset or laying a guilt trip on you. Whether people came to my wedding(s) or not wasn’t a big deal for me either.
Funny how weddings have a way of making people upset. In this case you’re the one upset because your sister isn’t upset.