What do I tell people when they ask how I injured my foot?
Asked by
Poser (
7808
)
August 15th, 2008
Sure, I could tell them the truth; I like some of the reactions I get when I tell people I was in a motorcycle accident. But I get bored easily and like to create my own fun. I need ideas on odd ways one might injure their foot.
So far, I’ve come up with, “I got stepped on by a Budweiser Clydesdale,” “My ex-wife ran over it with a car,” and, “I was doing Karate in the garage…” (a la Stepbrothers). I need some new ideas. I never realized how many people are curious when they see a stranger on crutches, and how redundant it can feel telling the story over and over again.
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27 Answers
An over-excited chihuahua did it when it was humping your big toe?
just say “freak submarine accident”
actually, tell them a 20 would refresh your memory.
You stepped on a firecracker?
Killed a man with your big toe?
Accidentally dropped the 400 lb weight you were lifting on it?
Mixed martial arts accident… You should see what happened to the other guy though…
Sex experiment gone wrong….
Dropped a shampoo bottle on it. No, the regular size. No, it was half empty. No, I’ve never broken any other bones before. No, my bones aren’t particularly brittle. No, you should just be careful with shampoo tomorrow. That’s all I’m saying.
(I did that. True story.)
Either that or tragic air guitar accident.
You stuck your toe in the wheel at 60 mph, to see what it would feel like.
A rung on the ladder broke, and while you broke your fall by grabbing onto a tree limb, you still twisted your ankle on landing.
You tripped on a train track while rescuing a cute little poodle that was frozen in place.
In conducting a high-energy physics experiment, you forgot to check your steel-toed boots at the door. Boy did you labmates laugh when they saw you hanging upside down from the acceleron by your foot.
You were going for the world record in lifting free weights, but dropped the bar, and didn’t move your foot in time.
You’re shilling for a shyster, and you have to make it look good if you want a really good settlement.
You tripped over an elephant?
You were on a wild and adventurous safari in the Brazilian Amazon Rain Forest and a massive hippopotamus chased you away from your group and into a quicksand hole. Before you realized that your current predicament was about to get much worse, you had firmly embedded your foot in the sucking hole of doom. After many hours of intense struggling, your safari guide finally was able to find and yank you out, almost severing your foot off in the process.
How about “I accidentally stepped on a railroad spike and ended up one-quarter crucified”?
That actually happened to my father when he was a boy. You can still see the entrance and exit points on his foot.
My answer anytime anyone asks me how I did anything to injure myself is “bar fight”
You were saving puppies from a burning building and you tripped on one of them on the way out?
You escaped from having been staked out on a fire ant colony.
You dangled your foot over the edge of the canoe and piranhas got you.
Brown recluse spider in your boot.
Stepped on a rattlesnake and a college coed sucked out the venom.
Your growing a second head on your ankle and it hurts.
”.....last month I injured my hand. One annoying guy was so obtuse and nosey he asked me how I did it…..and that is how my foot was injured…..”
by injuring the person who asked the question. It really was very clear in my head when I was typing it. I swear
Or….I was in the middle of a really great post on Fluther. My wireless high speed died. I dove for the ethernet cable, tripped over the dog and injured my foot.
No?
Tell them you were born that way. It will embarrass them and shut them up fast.
I agree with breedmitch (great answer!). And after you say that, start crying. :D
Tyson took it for another ear but before you could land your signature upper-cut, he bit off your big toe. Luckily, after Tyson blacked out (from your bare hands, of course), you were able to pry it out of his mouth and get it surgically reattached; hence the thick cast on your foot.
tell them you were experimenting with plutonium in a top secret military base when you got attacked by a bunch of chickens made out of month old French bread.
You were dropped kicked out of a treehouse and landed on a motorcycle engine. That actually happened to my husband when he was 6, only it was his head that broke the fall.
Hop-scotch contest got too intense.
I don’t know if i can speak for anyone else but I could tell the same story a hundred times and not get bored, If i tell a fake story it’s just not fun.
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