Why do some people seem to be unable to hear inflections in other's voices?

Because they are less attentive or too much involved with what they are doing?

I don’t know, but guesses include:

* Some children attempt to summon their mom by calling “mom”, sometimes with exaggerated tones that moms may start to tune out, to have a moment to themselves and because otherwise they’d be rushing from child to child being asked to bring them food or just competing with each other for mom’s attention. I don’t know if that’s the case, but some moms may develop a thick filter against giving “mom!” much attention.

* In Rick’s case, it might just be that guys tend to have less sensitive non-literal/verbal communication skills, and females are much more sensitive and subtle and also more expectant that others will get and respond to such cues.

* And regardless of gender or parental experiences, some people are no doubt just tuned to different types of communication and to specific cues. (For example, it’s not the case here (unless Rick is foreign) but different cultural groups can have very different voice inflections and meanings for them.)

Just guessing, though.

@Dutchess_III – As per your earlier post Rick is having difficulty in hearing lately if I’m not wrong. That might add up to the issue as well.

I know people who hear too much meaning in tone. I don’t know how many times I have been misread because of my tone.
Funny enough the one who is usually accurate about what I mean in my tone is my son. And he sucks at everyone else. 99 percent of the time, he miss reads other people except me. My daughter is great with inflections from other people but can miss what my tone infers when it’s directed at her. When not directed at her, she is usually on point.
I think most people become accustom to certain inflections that tend to come their way from certain individuals and become conditioned to either ignore or read to much into them when it is directed at them.

I don’t know why. But perhaps it’s related in some way similar to why some people can’t understand humor.

What bugs me is how some people put reflection in their voice when it isn’t appropriate. For example making their voice tone go up at the end of sentences like they’re asking a question but not.

Also people sometimes use facial expressions that are the opposite ot their verbal communication. Like a smiling face generating angry words. Weird.

These are some good answers guys. Yes, I can tell you Mom was very deep into herself. I know now that she suffered from depression. That may have been it.

@gondwanalon, I think some of that conflicting signals can be chalked up to passive / aggressive behavior.

@imrainmaker I’m thinking of two specific times I was on the phone with Rick. One was when he was 60 miles away, and I was in the house, being hit by a tornado. I was sitting on the top step of our cellar, ready to jump. The electricity had gone out, the house was taking a beating, and I was terrified. I called Rick, telling him I was being hit by a tornado. He said he’s been watching the weather channel, and there was nothing happening down here. He was so fucking condescending, like I was being a silly girl, freaking out over nothing, which is NOT like me at all. I couldn’t believe he couldn’t hear it in my voice. I hung up on him.
5 minutes later it passed, and the phone rang. It was Rick. He said, “Val! The weather channel says multiple tornadoes touching down in (my town.)”
I screamed, “NO SHIT!” and hung up on him.

There was another incident where I was close to panicking. I was in the front yard with the twins, and I called him for help. He was working, in the house. I asked him to come here and help me! Apparently he couldn’t hear the panic in my voice because it was a solid 5 minutes before he got to me.

So I don’t think his hearing was the issue. Plus both of those were a few years ago, when his hearing was better.

On the other hand, I was at my computer the other day when Rick said, “Val. Come here.” Something in his voice caused me to react instantly. He was in the kitchen looking out the window. I looked, and the neighbor’s yard was on fire. The wind was blowing really hard. It could spread out of control in an instant. He asked if he should call the police and I’m like, “Hell yes!”