Does having a low libido preclude relationships?

I have a quite low libido. It was a problem in my first sexual relationship and was the main reason I ultimately broke things off with that guy. Having sex with him began to feel like a chore because he wanted it so much more than I did.

I am now in a healthy 4-year-long relationship with a different man. He has never said anything about having low libido himself, but I think he either has low libido or just doesn’t consider frequent sex to be a high priority, because we’re currently having sex about once a month and he isn’t complaining. And it’s not that he’s trying to initiate more often and I’m turning him down; it’s just that one or the other of us only initiates about once or twice a month.

It’s great. I don’t feel smothered, we’re madly in love, it’s just not a super sexual relationship. It’s working just fine.

You just have to find a compatible partner. It might make it harder to find the right person, but it certainly doesn’t preclude relationships altogether.

Not at all. My current husband and I are a perfect match. Neither of us is interested in coitus.

Loves does NOT equal sex!!! When I was going through menopause, in one day I went from needing to have sex 3–4 times a day to saying “don’t even think about it“every time he looked at me. For him it was a big deal & he pretty much demanded that I go on HRT just so HE could be sexually satisfied. His mouth kept saying “I love you & I just want you to be healthy”. In my mind, his actions said “I don’t care if you die just as long as you die during sex so I have time to find a new partner before I need it again”. We ended up breaking up because all info I had at the time said HRT would NOT be safe for me & he did NOT care!!!

I met another man & we fell in love. I worried myself into a frenzy worrying about how he would react when I explained that I had lost ALL desire for sex. We took our time building our relationship & when the day finally came, I nervously explained my problem to him. He laughed & said “that’s fine, I have ED”. After that we hugged & snuggled a lot which was even MORE satisfying than the sex I’d had in the past. When you’re truly “in love” sex is NOT the most important part of the relationship!!!

My point…this guy truly loves you & although he might like to have sex every now & then, he seems to be happy just loving you. IF he hasn’t complained in 4 years, he’s really not concerned with it. He’s happy sharing your love!!!

Nope but it is helpful if you find someone who is sexually compatible with you so someone who also has a low libido.

Like @janbb it’s the compatibility you need to worry about.

One friends husband has very low libido and it runs in his family. His wife is very healthy and sexual, so it’s verged on divorce discussions a few times or even an open marriage. From her pov, going without for almost a decade wit few more decades of marriage ahead, seems intolerable.

Viagra is covered by my insurance so I am good to go if needed. But generally I am cool if I rub one out in the morning. So if my partner didn’t want sex not a huge issue. But if action is required I can perform with some pill shaped assistance.

I should add that your taxes pays around 95% of my healthcare cost. Thanks for the healthy erection!!

A lot of the answers seem to come from an older generation.

But I am young, unmarried and I was just wondering why I cannot have a guy fall in love with me for the right reasons, me. I wonder this as I see couples out and about, and watch Netflix.

I am fine alone. But I feel I am missing out on a vital part of human-ness — togetherness and love.

I am afraid I will grow old with no one to relate to.

I have always been this way. In college, I slept with guys because that was what they wanted, and I believed they would love me into the hereafter. When I woke up to reality (lol), most guys who would initiate with me just wanted sex.

I am very attractive and intelligent, so I get a lot of attention. But as I go through my life, I am realizing I am much happier alone.

Sigh. I just… want love. If I cannot have it, that is fine too. Thank you all!

Why are you thinking that the age of the poster matters? Just wondering.

It depends. Males have a stronger sex drive than females because males are (basically) sexually driven whereas females are (basically) security driven. If it wasn’t for sex, men would probably not get involved with women and if it wasn’t for the security men can provide for women, women probably wouldn’t get involved with men.

@janbb as I read beyond the first poster, I could not relate with the posters.

With age comes maturity. I find it sad that the kids now days see no validity to the older generations opinions. Until you live it, you have NO experience with which to form a valid opinion. I find it interesting that the ONLY responses were people who actually had experience & the non experienced didn’t understand the responses.

So, to try & rephrase what I was saying in simpler terms, YES, it is possible to find somebody to love you JUST FOR YOU; but you have to be patient until you meet them!!!

First of all, you do NOT need somebody else to make you happy. Take control of your own life & make your own happiness. It’s NOT that difficult. STOP focusing on what you don’t have & realize what you DO have!!!

I had the same feelings about love as you do when I was about 23.
One day I realized that I might never find the love I desired and that I had better get accustomed to the idea and just accept it. I have seen others who couldn’t seem to grasp this notion and they have suffered mightily for not seeing things the way I have.
It’s a tough pill to swallow and I think it takes quite a commitment to see it the way I did, but it has helped me be a lot over the years.
If it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t.
Move on…

Ok, here’s the deal. A low library is uh…
A low life is like a… Hey, is that a possum?

You just find a partner with a low libido and —problem solved.