I want a bf but for real I'm not that pretty.help me!

Trolling doesn’t help.

Sweetie, the first step is to be a little more positive about yourself. And any boyfriend “for real” who only wants to date you for your looks is not who you want to be dating. As trite as it may sound…

thx les that was helpful

If this a serious question then here is my serious answer:

Be more confident, and be yourself. Don’t try and be someone you are not. Be outgoing and kind, and one day you may find the one.

@Kirstein; in your profile, you said that you were “an expert in everything.” Perhaps you could answer your own question and let the rest of us deal with the mature issues of frizzers and dead bodies under swimming pools.

what ever gail and my name is kirsten not kirstein!

Yep, another case of the “Z”

Edit: Kirsten;

and I changed my profile!

Find someone else just as ugly or uglier and you will find love.

You may not feel you are pretty, bu you can be attractive. Take some time and trouble maximizing your physical appearance. Smile a lot. Be a positive presence when you are in groups and around people. Display a good sense of humor and be a good sport.

Look for kindness, brains, a sense of humor in guys.

thx marina

your no help buster

Sometimes you need to lower your standards.

what ever your still no help

First of all, how old are you?

I really don’t think your going to find a answer that will land a boyfriend.

But try two things
1. Be yourself
2. Stop looking. It will happen when you least expect it.

16

Okay, learn to create sentences that make sense and maybe then you’ll get serious answers. Responding with “what ever” doesn’t make your answer more likely to be answered.

Come on now!

ok I’ll try

Oooh ooh, date a Theater kid! They stand apart from normal weirdos and creepos because they usually have a sense of humor, and don’t have any weird hobbies. I mean, there are lots of cool oddballs out there, but they might actually have a pipe bomb in their basement. Theater kids are cool, and may have lower standards. Pick one up by joining Stage Crew at your high school.

Just make sure you get a straight one :D

thank you trumi

Some AV nerd in Nebraska is gonna owe me big time!

^ Hahaha, Indeed.

beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You should really beholding yourself a little better than that. I think some of the things that make people look the best have nothing to do with their physical characteristics but their attitude and confidence. In the end, Les hit it on the head. Anyone who sees only how you look isn’t worth it.

just relax and figure out who you are and what type of person you want around, don’t forget 2 stay positive and SMILE : ) ... like the kool-aid

I’m available…..

lets see a picture ^^

Guys, she said 16.

Indy is like 83. lol

haha not like I’m interested, I just want to see a picture of the girl who said she isn’t pretty.

@randommrdan- Beauty is skin, haven’t you been following the thread?

Btw, I’m only 17, crunch, just a tad off.

Yeah, just a tad.

I didn’t say I want to get to know the girl, just want to see a picture.

Crunch, do I really come off as a 83-year-old??

Oh yes, back to the topic at hand, what’s your sign girl? I’m a Pisces….

@Indy

If it’s not skin then what’s going for her here on Fluther? She doesn’t seem interesting nor intelligent.

Everyone else has been focusing on accenting your personality traits, but clearly you’re concerned with your appearance. Obviously, there is much more to attraction than appearance, but it’s certainly a legitimate aspect, and I don’t think that it’s helpful for others to try to make you feel better by downplaying appearance to the point that it simply “doesn’t matter.” That’s not how attraction works in our society.

However, a face is just a face. Short of plastic surgery, you’ve got the face you’re born with. But it can start to appear more attractive if you’re more confident with your body. You can change your body. Try a healthy diet and a work out plan. Imagine the fittest body with a not-so-pretty face—guys are still going to be attracted. Even the biggest “butherface” can score a cute and nice boyfriend. If you work on feeling comfortable with your body, the rest will come! Good luck getting hot!

@kirsten1345 – Hun I think that we all think we’re not pretty or good looking at some time in our lives. I’m hoping that nobody has been mean enough to tell you that you aren’t that pretty. Please don’t let anyone convince you that you aren’t pretty. There is someone out there who will and/or does think you are gorgeous already, I promise.

Guys can be clueless when it comes to girls. I’m 40, and the men around my age are still clueless!! I’m betting there is already at least one guy (or maybe more) out there who thinks you are fabulous and is too shy to ask you out. As the others have said, be yourself, don’t pretend to be anything other than that. Be the best you that you can be, because in the end, that is what will attract someone special to you.

Hmmm. My daughter will be your age in 4 years. Do you have any idea how scary that is for a parent? To have a daughter out there, wanting to enter the world of dating, and she has no experience? She’s discovering everything for the first time; the highs when someone you like likes you back. The devastation when they stop liking you.

When you both are totally into each other, you think you’re in love, and it’ll last forever, and you can’t imagine being happier. It is the most desirable thing in the world, it seems to me. I wanted to be in love more than anything when I was your age. Actually, for me, that desire never went away.

But, I thought I was ugly. I thought no girl would be interested in me. Ever. I was lonelier than you can possibly imagine. Or maybe you can imagine.

High school can be hell for a lot of people. The advice others have given is good, but it might not help. Sometimes, you just have to survive high school, and move on. When you’ve been to collge, or gotten a job, and gotten to be friends with people, your boyfriend will appear, ugly, or not.

If I could go back and tell myself some piece of advice from what I know now, I think I’d tell me to try not to freak out about it so much. I’d tell me that eventually, things would work out. In fact, being slow to join the relationship world was a good thing, hard as it was, anxious as I was, it made me go slow, and learn to understand people, and women, better.

Like Tantigirl said, I’m still clueless, and I’m 52. I’ve been married 17 years, and I didn’t know that my wife loved me!

Don’t sell yourself short. Don’t get desperate. Believe that eventually you will be happy. Don’t feel like you have to do this now, or else you’ll be a failure. It may be very frustrating, but it will happen. Just hang out now. Make friends. Hang with a group. Eventually, one or more of the boys in the group will figure out that there’s more to you, and they’ll want to spend more time with you. Just the two of you.

One more thing. Working hard at learning really will pay off. But it will take at least a decade. Keep at it. Become educated.

So many suckers took the bait on this one.

Ugly girl: post proof, a pic of you holding up a sign with fluther on it. If you were serious, we’d need to look at fashion, behavior, confidence and so on.

Attention whores on the Internet? Not news, kids. Get real.

Harsh, lovelace. The kid promised to try.

Promised to put a sentence together.

My name’s not Lovelace, and that’s no kid.

Whatever. It’s peanut butter jelly time.

yeaaaahhh http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8MDNFaGfT4

Almost every experience I’ve had dealing with young women has taught me that they never see themselves as they are seen by the rest of the world. Even my current 23 year old girlfriend (who is absolutely gorgeous) thinks that she is, at best, of average attractiveness. She is a smart and observant person in every other area of her life, except when it comes to looking in the mirror. She is the rule, not the exception, in my experience.

Understand, Kirsten, that 16 is much younger than you think it is. You have years and years of dating and, if you decide, marriage ahead of you. For now, do yourself and your future boyfriends/husband a favor and learn to develop a proper self image. Your attitude about yourself is the primary trait with which men will fall in love. It will be much more attractive than your face (which, again, if my experiences are any indication, is probably not as unattractive as you believe).

@Lovelocke – If this isn’t real, well, our posting answers hurt nobody, it may help someone else who reads this though. It is possible that this person really wants help here, and it is also possible that we are being taken for suckers. So what?

Listen sweetie;
I have seen women who at first glance were butt ugly and thought, how in the world did SHE get a guy like that?
I also was not the prettiest kid, (chubby and lots of zits) so I studied these not so hot girls to figure out their secret.
Secret 1: Their self value was not based on their appearance. They focused on their attributes
Secret 2: They were genuinely concerned with the welfare of others.
Secret 3: They were exceptional listeners. They ACTIVELY listened to other people, not needing to talk to much but asking questions and genuinely wanting to hear the others response
Secret 4: They had a life mission. They were passionate about something and worked hard to make the world a better place.
Secret 5: They respected people, didn’t bad mouth, and didn’t gossip.
Secret 6: They still knew how to flirt. Flirting is an art and the best flirters are very subtle. My sister, (The master flirter) doesn’t even know she is flirting. She flirts so much that even GIRLS fall head over heels for her! Her flirting pretty much encompasses everything I have already said. The only added thing is a meaningful touch. When she meets someone she shakes hands sincerely, with both hands. If someone is telling her something heartfelt, she will place her hand on their shoulder. She uses peoples name in conversation. Everyone who knows my sister raves about her beauty. Funny thing is, people who I just show a picture of her to don’t get what I mean. Her beauty comes from her genuine desire to understand and be compassionate for others.

One more thing about flirting:
Look them in the eye

oh man, is that the truth.

I feel used

indy318; Used?

I think Indy wasn’t looked in the eye while he was being seduced.

Hopefully she was kind , and Genuinely interested in him and who he was! Sincerity is the best quality of any flirter!

Crunchaweezy;
I just watched that video! what a crack-up. I feel like I have just been let in on a segment of pop culture that my advanced age has deprived me of!

As others have said, don’t be in too much of a rush. You are 16 and that is still very young. Live and learn how to be the person you want to be without relying on a boyfriend or any other person to define who or what you are. I know so so so many girls who were amazingly sweet and kind and couldn’t get the time of day in Highschool, but five to ten years later they have grown to be breathtakingly beautiful. A lot of the beauty is the way they take care of themselves and the way they feel about themselves confidently. You have a lot of life in front of you, don’t rush into something at your age that could affect the rest of your life in bad ways. Relax, Breath, Learn, Grow, Mature, Blossom. You will look back at your youth and laugh.