What are your favorite come back lines?

“Did you think that one up by yourself?”
“Is a frog’s ass watertight?”
“Who died and made you boss?”
“The jury’s still out on that one.”
“I’ll have to get back to you on that.”
“Why? Does it matter?”
“Fuck if I know!”
“What does the book say?”
“Who asked you?”
“Who rattled your cage/chain?”
“Does your head hurt?”

“Oh, thanks for sharing. I’ll take it under advisement!”

Best ever answer to any unwelcome comment. It’s polite, and they were acknowledged, yet I didn’t have to give any ground. It’s awesome.

The oldie but goody, “I knwo you are but what am I?”

Edit: “know”

My ex-boss was talking to a colleague of his.
“You can’t wait to piss on my grave, can you?”
My ex-boss replied “Not at all. When I got out of the army, I promised myself I would never stand in line again.”

When I was very small, my dad would call me a smart ass.
Every time I would come back with, “I would much rather be a smart ass, than a dumbass like you.”
I knew I was going to be backhanded, but I felt it had to be said.
I never added what a prick he was for talking like that to a child.

I see two. ^^ Anybody else?

A comeback to the line, There is no “I” in team is, Yes, but there is a “me” in team.