If you're critical of the education system, how do/did you get your children through it?

At first I homeschooled. Then after that they ended up going to private schools.

In some places there are grassroots organizations that work together to hold the school board accountable. PM me for details if you’re interested.

That’s a VERY good question. But a suitable answer on how things evolved would require an essay for which I haven’t the patience.

I’m going to guess that you don’t really mean critical. If I’m not critical of the school my kid is attending, regardless of the kind of school it is, then I’m not paying attention. I will guess you mean something like, if you’ve given up on the school system, or if you feel despair over sending your kid, something like that.

Both myself and my ex-wife are satisfactorily literate and numerate and capable of critical thinking, despite both being victims of the public school system. We long ago concluded that as long as you’re in a reasonably safe environment with a modicum of educational resources, the quality of the teaching is not all that important compared to your own motivation to learn. We both grew up in houses full of books, and we learned to read by sitting in the laps of our parents or older siblings while they read to us.

Although I haven’t done any double-blind studies, I sense that for most kids, parental attitude toward education is very important. Among my daughter’s peers, the motivated kids were the ones with motivated parents; the kids who enjoyed learning were the ones whose parents enjoyed learning. The kids who hated school were the ones whose parents were indifferent toward learning.

And I think it matters most during the kid’s earliest years. I learned to read in the laps of my mother and sisters, before my mother married a far right-wing type who equated education with empty-headed self-importance and snobbery, and delivered long speeches at the dinner table about how teachers are all idiots. But he had no effect on my love of reading and learning.

Although my wife and I could have afforded private school for our kid, we sent her to public school so she could learn the vital lesson of getting along with many different kinds of people, and in particular, to learn the culture of her own generation—she’ll be spending a lot of time with them.

She did well in school, substandard though it was, and now she’s doing well at university. I’m sure genetics play a factor, but I’m convinced the main thing is the example and attitude of the parents. Of course, I would be convinced, because then I can claim some credit. Although I’m sure home-schooling has its advantages, I think your kid can get a good education even in public school, given an education-positive environment at home. Especially books. Especially making good associations with reading by doing it with them in your lap and at bedtime. Peace

I was very intrusive in my kid’s education. They attended public schools and I made it a point of introducing myself to the school office and the teachers. I asked my kids to tell me about their classes and what they were learning. I paid attention to how much homework they were getting and if they were getting it done. I intervened on behalf of the school when my kids weren’t meeting my expectations and I intervened on behalf of the kids when the school wasn’t. I made my kids’ educations a priority in my life, even though I was a single parent.

I was interested and active in their education. If I felt they were teaching something but the kids weren’t understanding, I didn’t go bitch. I sat down with the kids and we’d review until they DID understand.
In 2nd and 3rd grade, one evening a week was spent on the front porch with my son learning spelling words.

I’m back into teaching after so long again. Things are pretty different! It was a 5th grade class and the lesson was on my most favorite subject of all, human history, including evolution. Everytime I mentioned something happening 20,000 years ago, this one kid would pipe up and say “I believe the earth was created 8,000 years ago and there is nothing you can say that will change my mind!”
I was, “OK.”
If evolution was mentioned, the same kid ”I don’t believe in evolution!”
“OK.”
I’ve never experienced such…militancy before!

I had strong feelings about schools when I was still attending them.
When it was time to educate my kids, I started myself, before they were public school age, and I continued to teach them in the areas I felt schools were lacking as they attended school.
My daughter is a senior in high school this year, and she is so motivated I half expect her school to go into orbit at any time.
I have done the best I could with my limited resources.
I truely believe the entire education system in the US needs to be restructured from the foundation up, but I have waited half a century for what still shows no sign of happening.

@Dutchess_III there is really a difference between a kid that is frustrated that the teacher can’t answer their questions, and one that refuses to learn.

Though they look similar at first, the former has a strong desire to learn and is willing to change when they are convinced. When the kid refuses to change even in the face of solid evidence, you know they only come to validate their ego.

Schools have serious flaw, but sometimes it’s the kids who cause troubles that aren’t there in the first place.

@Mimishu1995, can you give me an example of what types of questions students ask that teachers can’t answer?

@Dutchess_III I have given your question some thought. And it’s not really that teachers are unable to answer, but more like they can’t make themselves convincing enough. Say a student asks “why do you say the Earth is more than 200000 years old? My mom always says it’s only 8000 years old”. A good teacher may say “look at this website/research paper/whatever-I-have-to-convince-you. Here’s the evidence…” And a bad teacher is like “that’s what they taught me and your mom can go to hell she’s uneducated!” And you know the problem is the kid when after being showed evidence they’re like “I don’t believe you! I know it’s 8000 years old and you are conspiring to tear me down!”

@Mimishu1995 You only gave two examples of how to handle such a situation, and neither is unacceptable. Both require a teacher to directly undermine the parent’s authority as well as argue directly with the child. Not only is it wrong, we don’t have time for that.

I faced this exact situation in a 5th grade class room last week. I was teaching the students the origin of humans, and every time something in pre history was mentioned, for example, the first indigenous people to arrive in North America came 20,000 years ago, this one kid would yell out, “My dad believes the earth is only 6,000 years old, and that is what I believe too!”
I most certainly did NOT not try to convince this child his dad was WRONG. I didn’t waste time pulling out “proof” just for him. I had 18 other kids I was teaching. But I got some licks in here and there, just for him. :)

While I agree that it isn’t worth the time to argue with one kid while you have an entire classroom to tend for, it becomes a problem when the kid disregard everything you say and it starts to influence the whole class. I’ve met two kids like that. One was taught an incorrect pronunciation and uses it as a proof that I’m an uneducated asshole and gets her friends against me on later lessons. The other wasn’t taught anything wrong, he just assumes things on his own and just refuses to listen to anything else, and his friends believe him unconditionally. You just can’t ignore that kind of shit when other kids start to believe you are wrong and stop taking you seriously just because one kid with a conspiracy theory manages to convince their friends better than a teacher. Kids bond better with their friends than teachers and they are easier to be influenced by each other. And the conspiracy theories of “that teacher either knows nothing or is trying to suppress our freedom” are always pleasing to the ears.

But I can see that the kids that do that kind of things are usually already have attitude problems that they project onto their knowledge. So it’s less about proving anyone right or wrong, it’s more about letting the kids know I deserve some respect too. It’s like with a disruptive kid. You ignore them and the class may think you tolerate that kind of behavior and start to copy one by one until no one takes you seriously anymore.

Ok.

God. I taught 18 3 year olds yesterday. I HURT so back, and my throat hurts and I have a weird cough and a massive headache. This one girl in the AM class wouldn’t stop crying and screaming for the entire 31/2 hours. I had 2–4 aids at different times and that’s just how she is.
Another kid, also in the AM class, just turned 3 two weeks ago. For intents he is 2 years old! He and screamer girl bounce off of each other.
It was a nightmare.

The afternoon class was a thousand times better, though. Still meant a lot of bending and kneeling and sitting on the floor and getting up.

Thanks, all. Food for thought.