If you are invited to an adult birthday party do you expect to give a gift?

Specifically designating it a “Birthday Party” will definitely trigger gift-giving, unless one specifies “No Gifts”. There will still be gifts, but not as many.

I always take a gift to a birthday party unless told not to.

ETA: “Adult birthday party” sounds so naughty! ;-)

Grown up birthday party?

I think it’s my responsibility to give a gift, unless the person in question specifically said not to do so (which is rare, as it’s not the custom here). If anything, what I don’t understand is why some people don’t give gifts when they attend someone else’s party. The host of the party waste resources so that you can enjoy yourself there, doesn’t it cross people’s mind that it’s only natural to pay them back?

Embrace the gifts that have been given to you. Don’t feel guilty about it. You deserve it. Don’t think that you’ve misled people by naming it “birthday party”, what more important is that your guests enjoyed themselves and you have put your efforts to bring that in to reality.

Yes. It doesn’t have to be much.

Usually something small unless “no gift” is specified. Sometimes just a bottle of wine.

No, I usually will bring something, but I never feel obligated. My social circle does “adult birthday parties” regularly, though, so it’s an unspoken understanding. Most people bring cards, sometimes a small gift like a bottle of wine or liquor, and some closer/friends family bring more significant gifts. Mostly cards, though.

Happy birthday! It’s a beautiful thing to celebrate a year of your life with the people you love, I’m sure they wouldn’t bring something if they didn’t want to celebrate you.

I would expect myself to give a gift.

Do you have pictures of the lighting?

No, not really. The most recent adult birthday parties I was invited to I was expected to bring food, but not an actual gift.

I usually (always?) bring something. Bottle of wine, Lottery tickets – if I know the recipient buys them. chocolates,... something.

I would, yes. Besides a card, I would try to take something small that somehow relates to our friendship. If there’s nothing I can think of like that, then something consumable other than alcohol.

Chocolate. Can never go wrong with chocolate.

WE would probably bring a bottle of wine.

Do they make chocolate wine?

Yeah they do, but I have never tried it.^^^^^

Wonder if people realize how often they bring wine to a nonalcoholic household.

Anybody else remember when a carton of cigarettes was considered a good gift?

@Jeruba I’m usually aware of which of my friends drink and which do not and would not be likely to make that mistake.

I gave grape juice to my son and his wife when they got married. It’s in a bottle that looks like a wine bottle.

Good grief yes, absolutely, it would be considered highly ignorant not to.

Thanks for your answers.

I don’t drink wine. I find it odd that people give wine regularly unless they know for sure the person drinks wine on some sort of regular basis. I find it odd considering alcoholism is not that uncommon. I’m not an alcoholic, I simply don’t drink the stuff. I usually regift wine given to me to, which ironically (or hypocritically) makes me one of the people bringing wine to a party sometimes. I try to only give wine to people who I know drink wine, but I’m not always perfect on that.

Chocolates, unfortunately, are probably as deadly for me as wine is for an alcoholic, but I do enjoy them. I just really don’t need a whole box.

Where I live I had assumed it would be much like what @Anef_is_Enuf and some others wrote, since most parties are no gift, and potluck, and they happen regularly here. Some people bring a small gift, especially if they are particularly close friends, many bring nothing but contribute to the potluck food.

Some of my gifts were $50 gift cards, which I think is a lot of money for something like this. Some gifts easily valued over $50. Some people gave me cash in a card, which isn’t actually very odd, because I teach zumba here, and it’s all volunteer so sometimes people give money, but usually they put in a few dollars, sometimes $20, and put it all together as a group gift. Truth be told I would have preferred that, because it costs me almost $500 a year to teach zumba, and I question why I do it sometimes. I probably should sub at a place where I can get paid so it at least would pay the licensing fees. The invitees were some from zumba, some from folk dancing (I don’t teach folk dancing) and some other friends and neighbors. The people who gave me cash gave me $20 or $40. Again, I think it’s a lot.

It was very nice of everyone. I’m very appreciative they all went to the trouble even if it’s a regift from Christmas (lol) but I know some items are not regifts, because they are specific to me, and obviously cash is directly out of someone’s pocket.

They have created some more work for me though. Now, I have to organize myself and write all the thank yous.

@Jeruba A carton of cigarettes is a perfect gift when visiting the home of a native American. Take some fruit for the wife and hard candy for the children and old folks.

Just tell people to stop with the damn presents already @JLeslie. Just tell them you don’t want them and you don’t appreciate them.

^^I do appreciate them.