How did the traditions of bowing, shaking hands, kissing hands, and other greetings start and end?
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JLeslie (
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April 6th, 2019
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I once read that a man is not supposed to extend their hand first for a handshake, but rather wait for a woman to extend hers. The passage also mentioned that at work in modern day this doesn’t necessarily apply.
Some cultures have rules about touching a woman, or men and women touching in general. This includes what most would consider to be completely platonic like when first meeting.
Many Asian cultures have a custom of bowing. How did that develop? I’ve seen Arab men kissing when they meet. It’s interesting within Asia how different those two things are. I realize we are talking about countries very far apart though.
I’m interested in facts about how these various ways of greeting developed, or how they changed over time. I also welcome opinions on the topic.
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20 Answers
Bowing, at least, goes back to biblical and pre-biblical days as a sign of respect and trust. If you bowed to a person you meet, it meant that you had no evil intent (i.e. to stab or kill him) and that you trusted him not to attack you either.
I don’t know about handshakes and kissing, although I imagine that both had to do with showing that you were harmless / no threat to the other party.
Kissing originated in your primate years, where your monkey-like ancestors transferred pathogens along with antibodies to their offspring, to train and strengthen their immune system.
So, the next time you see a random antivaxxer kid, give it a sloppy smooch.
The handshake, in a similar vein, was to show that you were not holding a weapon.
Obviously you still could have something concealed, so it was probably a symbolic gesture.
It was started by Satan worshippers as a way to spread germs!!!
Hey now, Satan worshippers are the good guys.
@Dutchess_III I think the handshake was probably invented before the understanding of germs. Some cultures understood being “clean” as a way to control illness transmission before other cultures. Like the Spanish who settled in Florida had very good standards in the 1500’s for surgeries.
Have you ever had a man kiss your hand? It’s not so much the germs for me as it is the ick factor of some guy I don’t know pressing his lips on a part of me, even just my hand.
I was told that Asians don’t shake hands because 20% a part of the population has sweaty palms . I don’t know if its true or not. I heard it from a Buddhist monk who visited Jasper 10 years ago. I don’t know if he was joking or not.
I was joking @JLeslie. From start to finish. I shook hands with 3 people today.and held hands with 3 grody children without the least bit of concern.
I currently have one of the worst stomach flus of my life. I haven’t had a stomach flu in over 30 years.
I keep begging God to make me better. Last year I avoided it when it went around.
It’s so bad.
I hope my husband doesn’t get it.
I made a nest on the bathroom floor. I fell asleep there 3 times today.
A man does not actually kiss a woman’s hand. He holds the hand as if he were going to kiss it but his lips do not actually touch the skin. Strictly symbolic. Not many know that, so it is fortunate that the practice has fallen out of favor. Maybe because women did not appreciate getting their hands slobbered on.
Mexican men HUG each other!
Arab men SMELL each other!
@SmartAZTgats interesting about the kids of the hand. Ever time a man did it to me, he really did kiss my hand. Maybe in 50 years it has happened to me 5 times, and not recently.
My husband is Mexican and he thinks it’s so weird that my Midwest friends hug when they greet each other. It’s uncomfortable to him. That’s just men and women, not two men. With his dad he kisses and hugs, but it’s his dad.
One of my sons by another mother kissed my hand just before he walked out of my life. He’s Mexican.
The good news is you will be immune now to the virus that caused your flu this year @JLeslie.
@Dutchess_III One of the very few upsides. Next year it will probably be a different strain. It’s so bad. Dangerously bad. I considered getting an IV.
Well just keep yourself hydrated. 7 Up and saltines. Also, if you’re up to it, the BRAT diet. Bananas Rice Apples Toast. Do you have someone to tend to you?
Keep getting flu shots from now on so you don’t have to worry about it next year.
@smartaz I don’t think that Arab men smell each other ritualistically. Do you have a link to an article? Do you know this firsthand?
@joeschmo If you read travelogues you will occasionally run across a warning that men in the middle east (maybe not all Arabs) SMELL each other. It is considered a friendly thing to do. They also consider it good manners to belch and fart while eating. It is considered a compliment to the cook.
Why do you ask for a source? We’re not discussing science here.
Do you really think that modern Arabs behave thus?
Belching and farting to compliment the chef?
I’m just quoting stuff I have stumbled across a long time ago.
A long time ago you stumbled upon something. Not have stumbled upon.
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