In the weeks since this siege elapsed do you have moments of frustration over how ignoble it feels when your life amounts to little more than hiding from death?

LOL.. Now all you fuckers know what cancer is like.

It is a permanent cloud. Always there waiting to pop back up. You fear the next CT scan in two months. It is really difficult to enjoy your time since you just sit there waiting for bad news. You just sit there stewing, waiting, and you don’t really give a fuck moving forward with your life because, it might be for naught. So you watch tv and eat hash browns.

I’m starting to feel a smidge of resentment, yes.

@johnpowell Moms scans came back clear again yesterday. I get it.

Nope. I don’t have those moments. But then, like @johnpowell , I’ve done the cancer thing, which is an infinitely more unpleasant way to “hide from death”. There isn’t time or energy left to do anything else.
If you are frustrated by thumb twiddling, do something else.

NO. I don’t feel that my life has become ignoble. Frustrating and scary at times but I want to hold on to it. And I am connecting with people in new ways.

What I really, really don’t want is to get a bad case of Covid-19 and dies in pain and alone.

I’ve been actively avoiding death since being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes at 25 years of age. ;)
That made me rethink the whole death thing . That and a conversation I had with my dad.
Even with that hanging over my head, I could still die from something completely different. I hope
Then when your friends & family members die from different things, it’s another reminder of how quickly (or slowly) one can go and the different ways they accomplish that.
Control? Not as much as we’d like to think

This question seems enormously over stated. I’m not hiding from death but merely avoiding illness. It’s an inconvenience not a saber rattling death sentence.

Frankly, I love it.
Already two weeks of not having to rush in the morning to get to work, and no annoying co-workers driving me up the wall.

Nah, far from it!
I’m thinking of becoming a recording rap singer.
My first song will be Gittin down wiv mah stay at homies

@ragingloli Sadly, I’m with loli. I know how desperate and scared people are but I have been getting things done around the house and enjoying social distance from people. I’m shocked at how ok I am with it. Work finally sent us home but on call and I’m really enjoying the back yard and good weather. I love not having to go to kids birthday parties or have social gatherings at the house. It’s refreshing but I feel a little guilty for feeling this way.

I just love the lack of traffic on the roads. I’m back in the Bay now and I’ve never seen the freeways so clear. It’s bliss.

Otherwise I’m just growing bored not being able to properly work. And I hate Zoom with a passion. No particular fear of death here. Of course I don’t want to get it and am taking proper precautions to avoid getting it, but thoughts of disease don’t consume my every waking moment.

So what else is new? Life is a gauntlet of death. When one gets that notion into one’s head, life can be easier to take.

I got a little pissed off this morning when I went to the dump and they don’t accept cash or checks at this time! I asked if I could have a bill sent to me and they said “You don’t have an account.” How can I set up and account? “You can’t.” Credit or debit cards ONLY!
Wow. What a time we have come to when businesses don’t accept cold, hard, legal tender!

I’m not hiding from death. I’m taking care of the things I can take care of and trying not to fret about the things I can’t (the Serenity Prayer, always the Serenity Prayer). It may seem odd, but this is far less stress than I had living with an active addict or two. If that was a 10—and it was at least a 10—I’d say this is more like a 3.

When you add them together, of course—well, I’m dealing with it. Had some experience. I’ve also had a father, a husband, and a son go through cancer (two survived), so that’s not alien to me either.

Since childhood I’ve always been happy staying in, not having to go anywhere, not having to be on time for anything, and being free to read, draw, listen to music, and all that. Right now I don’t even have noisy neighbors or barking dogs nearby, and that’s almost enough to make me wonder if there’s a divinity in my corner. (Nahhh…)

So although I’m unhappy about this situation and the threat it poses to the nation and the world, to the community, and especially to loved ones, the experience of it so far has been only mild inconvenience at the grocery store.

And a whole lot of extra soap and water.

My days, including before the “siege” caused so many a new view of my circumstances, are involved with moving forward.
I am in a cocoon, and feeling safer than most right now.

I am nearing publication, and I am excited for that. I’m wishing I could move it up, so I could urge bored people to buy my books.

@Patty_Melt How exciting, I can’t wait!

@Patty_Melt Very cool. What kind of books have you written?

One is an expanded telling of Cinderella, but mostly from Charming’s angle. It is like a five course meal compared to the entrée versions told so far. It is more grown up than sewing mice.
My current work in progress is an adventure in the era before the mass extinction of the dinosaurs.
I have a number of shorts involving the migration of humans to North America, and subsequent periods pre European invasion.
There are the first two of a trilogy which involve dimension pilgrimage, and some unusual clones.
There are a few synopses gathering dust in a flash drive corner waiting development.

Yes, I am female, but I am just not the romance novel type. :-)

The only time I worry is when I’m at work. I’m enjoying my time at home. I have a deck and backyard. I live two blocks from a lake that I can walk to. I visited a state park yesterday. I cuddle with my cats and binge tv when it rains. I’m good.

@Jonsblond Me too. I feel safe and cozy at home and have enough to do most days. And if I have a lazy day – so what?

As if there was ever anything more to my life.

@stanleybmanly What’s the big difference for you that now you find your life ignoble and boring?

My life is more or less unchanged, slightly more stressful, mainly due to the stress of others. The aspect of awareness of mortal risk is slightly increased but no different for me than it always was.

I have always known that people don’t live forever. Nor should they. I personally am out and about every day, delivering to grocery and convenience stores. And I really have no fear of the virus. If I get it, I get it. If it’s my time to die, it’s my time. Worrying about it only robs me of enjoyment life offers.

I’m not hiding. I normally don’t get out much anyway.

Not hiding from death. Merely slowing the onslaught on our medical infrastructure.

Exactly.

A better and more fitting view.

I’m limiting my news consumption and social media use. Being bombarded with all the doom and gloom is hard on anyone but especially those of us who have anxiety and depression. It has helped me find peace during this shit storm.

I’m trying to avoid it too @Jonsblond. I’m not above sharing the jokes, though. One of my friends got oh so angry with people sharing the jokes. She’s yelling, DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND HOW SERIOUS THIS IS?? Take a chill pill woman, before you give yourself an aneurysm. Freaking out and stressing out doesn’t help a damn thing.

@Patty_Melt That sounds very cool, especially the Cinderella one. I’d read them all. You inspired me to get some work done on my second novel (a complicated mystery about two college-age guys who get caught up in a web of conspiracy). I wrote 3000 words today, including a sex scene. Fun stuff. :)