I just feel bad for the doctors and nurses that have to clean up after this mess.
I’m going to flashback to 1997. I was working at a movie theater as an usher. We mostly hid and ate stolen nachos. But when we weren’t doing that we had to clean theaters.
So it was a normal Monday morning. It should have been slow, I should have done nearly nothing my entire shift. You see, normally schools would send us their schedule so we could have the appropriate staff on hand. But this Monday slipped through the cracks. Every school in the county had a in-service day.. And I was alone cleaning a 8 screen 2.5K seat theater.
Instantly everything went horribly wrong. One person selling tickets. I know how to sell tickets too. I will help. Now those people want popcorn and sodas, I need to help tearing tickets too. Finally, relief, time for Cinnabon and Sbarros.
Then all the movies got out. And we had things planned so it went in bunches so we could schedule breaks. Every seven minutes a movie would get out and we could get in there and clean the place. Seven minutes was actually a lot of time if you have four people in there cleaning and it was a normal day.
But this was not a normal day. School was out and kids are messy little fuckers.
So I was alone, on a day with really messy people and I was losing my shit. And to top it off nobody, nobody would come in to help us out. We called the entire staff list and everyone had an excuse because they knew they would be in the shit too. Time and a half wouldn’t entice them either.
So in the end I take off the stupid vest and bowtie and my shirt and I am running around theaters topless with a leaf blower and covered in sweat erotic. We used leaf blowers to blow all the popcorn and lids and stray candy to the screen and then we would sweep it all up.
There was no sweeping on this day. Everything was just blown to the front and the mice had a party. Seriously, theaters are rat heavens. Popcorn gets behind the screen and in the subs and in the curtians and we had rat poison everywhere. We would find dead ones in the hallways and we would pretend like it was trash and not a big deal. At least a few dead rats a day. Nibble on that.
Were we at 100% theater capacity? No, only about 95%. But 100% is worst case. So when you say it is all good until you hit 100% ICU what you are saying is there will be a lot more dead rats in the hallways and the employees at the hospitals will really dread being at work and will be burned out and you are going to be their pile of popcorn that we just just don’t have enough time to put you in the dumpster or make sure that ventilator is working exactly right.
But masks are for pussies, so whatever.
