Dating advice?

How interested are you in her? If not extremely, and you’re trying to work on yourself, keep trying to work on yourself.

Now or “later in life”, you never “keep her into” you. You don’t control other people. You think of them as having their own choices, attractions, and turnoffs, and you think about what sort of woman (beyond “hella cute”) you really want to have what kind of relationship with, and what sort of man you think they’d want to be in that kind of relationship, and then you do your best to be a good example of that kind of man. With that clear in your mind, you communicate with her, making inquisitive invitations and seeing whether she is open to them or not. If not, you realize that means she is not a woman like you want who is interested in you, and so you keep trying to be a good example and look for other interested women whom you are very interested in.

(“Each other” is two words. So is “to hang out”. A “hangout” is a place. Similarly, “to hook up” is two words, a verb phrase. A “hookup” is an event (a noun), or a place to plug something in.)

I don’t really know. Like I said, I think she’s cute and I did enjoy the little vibe we had. But then again I know the second I start get feelings for someone I get too into them, and it goes downhill for me. Even when it’s supposed to be a casual thing I end up falling for them.

I think I’m just gonna let it go. I don’t want to go through this again. I don’t how or why I keep putting myself in this situation. I shouldn’t have been doing all that a few nights ago, im pretty sure she’ll go on about her life, so I should too.

First of all, be a friend and nothing more. If she wants to be more than friends, she’ll let you know. Maybe she was just checking you out. Maybe she really isn’t ready for you. Or your friends. Be cool and give it some time. She may do a background check (of sorts) on you and maybe she’ll get back to you.

Kind of sounds like you come off kind of desperate.

You may have got too hot too quick and scared her. Or you got goofy when you smoked ha!

Is her roomate a girl or guy? You never know, maybe dhe’s working on herself too. I’d hit her up as a friend and just see if she’s receptive.

So this women “just met” you and invites a total stranger and HIS friends to her place?
I would wonder if she did this all of the time?

One day she will pick up a “serial killer” and put everyone lives in danger possibly.

Never mind what SHE was doing but think on YOUR actions of ‘just going along with” whatever that she suggested.

The fact that she invited you and your friends to her place and then acted disinterested, seems possible that she could be helping her room mate socialize in a party setting to find a boyfriend.

In any case she was observing you and your friends interact naturally.

I would put safety first, and next time be more vigilant in regards to safety, as one never knows what one is getting into when going to a strangers place.

Also sounds like a ‘cat and mouse” game where she entices then draw back hoping that you would get more interested and the chase is on.

If not into these games , drop her quick and YOU observe her at the bar for the next while to see if she is doing that to others, if so it can’t be good, so be careful.

Hell pal, just cut the Sigmund Freud crap, call her and ask her out. If she agrees take her out to a nice restaurant or movie or something, and see what, if anything, develops. It might work out it might not. But like my Old Pappy used to say, just run that up the flag pole and see who salutes. If you don’t try, you’ll never know the difference.

Well thanks. I have tried to reach out and well I don’t think it’s gonna work. I was going to ask her out but she takes forever to respond and that means either A she’s busy, B she’s not interested, or C both. And I feel like it’s more of answer C. So I’m just going go bowling with my roommates that night. I don’t why I’m acting like this, it’s just a girl I met at the bar. No need to get all caught up and start liking her like that. Just a one night thing. I just going to go back to working on myself again.

Well don’t get all negative, we have all been shot down from time to time. You’ll find a good gal one day, just keep you chin up and hang in there.

@steelers13 Were you wearing a Steelers jersey that night, because that could explain it. hahaha! (Just kidding! #Chiefsfan)

Yeah I guess I will one day, it just seems like I got the worst luck at this stuff. Like I suck at a lot of things and I hate giving up or quiting on something when I want to get better but this stuff is just something else.

And @KNOWITALL I wasn’t wearing my jersey out, I probably wouldn’t be in this position if I did hahaha! Maybe I’ll bring my good luck jersey out next time! hahaha!

@steelers13 Well just remember, everything happens in it’s own time. Maybe continue to work on being the best YOU, you can be, to make yourself a good partner.

Do you know how to take care of yourself, like cooking and laundry?
Do you have a nice, calm temper?
Do you rely on drugs/alcohol to get through the day or reduce stress?
Do you have the ability to earn an income to take a lady out on occasion?
Are you mature enough to recognize love if it happens to show up tomorrow?
Do you enjoy showing affection or know how to do so?
Are you selfish?

There is a lot you can do now to prepare yourself, and I say that as a 40-something married to a guy who wasn’t quite prepared because his parents marriage(s) were so disasterous.

*Well hopefully it’s not a Raiders jersey…nobody likes that team. haha!