Are you (if male) a "next-to-her," or an "across-from her?" If you are female, which kind is your man?

My husband and I are “across” types. Many reasons, including being able to look at each other while we talk. When I see a couple sitting next to each other in a booth, I always imagine they are in the throes of a new, intense love.

Either that, or he is publicly exhibiting his dominance and control over her, while proclaiming to the entire population of the planet that, “I am afraid she will escape!”

I must respectfully admit that I think such dudes are control freaks, and that if I was a female and dating a guy like that, I’d make sure that we didn’t have another date, after that one.

When we manage to get a four person booth, but it’s just us, we’re next-to-each-other types. And we always feel like we’re getting away with something! Usually, though, we’re across-from-each-other, especially if we aren’t alone. Our antics are bad enough without sitting side by side…

we’ve been dating for less than a year, we’re allowed to be all over each other still

@augustlan: you’re not wrong.

To my way of thinking, when a couple sits on the same side (with the man on the “exit side,” that he is subconsciously displaying his “ownership” of the female, and sending a message of some kind that, “She belongs to ME, and you better not come near her, because I BITE!”

I just don’t believe that a man should “own” a woman.

Across…no matter who it is…I like looking at the person with whom I am having a conversation with. Plus, I want to eat my meal with elbow room. There is another place and time to hold my hand or cuddle with me, than at the dinner/lunch/breakfast table.
I am there for one purpose… to eat.

One vote in my column! Thanks for responding, Woody!

I agree with Sarapnsc, I will always sit across from my date/girlfriend. I think it would be weird if I were to sit right next to her, especially if no one was with us.

With that said though, I will say that….if I had a friend with us and we’re out to lunch, my friend would probably sit across from us, and she would be next to me.

I prefer “across-from” men. Like you said, I like the personal space, and frankly it’s kind of annoying to have to “turn your neck” the whole time to talk. Face to face is a lot easier (while eating too!) to manage and keep a conversation going. Unless of course…you aren’t in the restaurant to “talk and eat”...and if that’s the case, may I suggest getting a room ;)

next, you can touch

across, unless we’re both watching the game or something…

If my woman and I are with another couple, we sometimes sit next to each other, but on occasion, we have sat across from each other, sitting next to the other person’s mate/date, with the gentleman on the outside.

But normally, I prefer to have the four of seated at a table with four chairs, rather than in a booth, unless the booth is very large, as is the case at OUTBACK Restaurants

I want him across from me. My footsie skills are better, and slightly more subtle, in that direction.

Aha!

And while you are “playing footsie,” are you plotting & planning?

If not, why not? (WEG)

Of course I’m plotting and planning! I’m a girl. It’s what we do best. :)

Agreed! Guys, write that down, and commit it to memory.

Yeah, like you can remember anything once we bust out the feminine wiles!

By the way, what does WEG means?

WEG = “Wicked Evil Grin”

(I thought you females knew everything!)

We know everything important. Like that look we give you from across the table where it looks like we think you’re the greatest thing since the appetizers hit the table. Yeah, we’re pretty good at that look.

Oh carp! Did I just give away a secret?

[Removed by me, because it no longer applies.]

No, I actually meant to say carp instead of crap. (It’s an askville thing, but I am not trying to drag askville into this discussion!!!)

Thanks for the explanation.

Excuse me, but I need to leave, to take a carp…

My boyfriend is a “next to” kinda guy. We’re in a long distance relationship that rarely permits us to see each other, so, when the opportunity arises, we never take our hands off each other… and this is the way I like it. @JackAdams, I completely agree with the fact that the guy should never control the girl or even try to, but mine isn’t like that at all. He’s probably the least controlling male alive, lol. But he really likes to be near me ALL the time, and if he wants to put his hand on my leg while we wait for our food, then, IMO, he’s more than welcome to. :) As far as “comfort” is concerned, I like the “across” situations, but considering how our dates only come around once every month-month and a half, I’m willing to sacrifice that to be a little closer to him for a little longer; however, if we’re in a very elegant restaurant, we sit “across” for the mere fact that it exudes and proper and mannerly vibe to coincide with the theme of the restaurant.

wow, responding to the question has really made me miss him :’(

I am an across-from-her guy

@Sloane2024: I hope the day arrives when the 2 of you will be together, all of the time, IF that is what the 2 of you both wish.

Happiness always…

We’re both? Depends on our mood(s).
(Or rather, we’re all three. Sometimes, it’s next-to with guy inside.)

No way.

No man would EVER sit, where he could not “escape.”

No man with issues would ever sit where he couldn’t escape. Real men however, are quite comfortable with the inside of the booth.

Nope.

The man hasn’t been born, yet, who would ever sit on the inside of a booth.

But, feel free to publicly name one (and provide his contact information) so all of us can verify it.

JackA: Dude, you forget to take into account that the inside seat may provide a better view of the television.

@ Jack Adams: Awww!! Thank you very very much. It should only be 2 more years before seeing each other on a regular basis will become a common occurrence, but thank you for the hopeful comments! :) He also usually asks me which end of the booth I would prefer to sit on- inside or out. :)

across from her so i can look into her eyes. “next to her” is for bed.

Charlie: Don’t you want to look into her eyes in bed too? Next to her? Damn! That is one hell of a Peyronie you’re sporting.

I really dislike the sitting next to me, it makes me have to put my purse on the floor.

@Nimis: You had written, “Dude, you forget to take into account that the inside seat may provide a better view of the television.”

You are absolutely right!

I should be ashamed for not thinking of that!

I stand corrected and humbled, before your superior wisdom!

Long live the holders of the remote!

I start off across from my date and then after food I move to sit next to them. And we eat dessert together, all snuggled, hehe.

ANeedle: You are disgustingly cute. Thank you. Sorry.

@nimis, I hope you thought about that thank you first. ;)

And the FINAL SCORE is:

Across-Froms: 12

Next-Tos: 4

The above totals include those who said, essentially, “sometimes one way, sometimes the other.”

Thanks for answering my Q, everyone!